Why do so many mothers stop working after their children go to kindergarten?

I guess there are two possibilities for the identity of the questioner, one is a married woman with no children, and the other is a married man with children, the former has not experienced it, and the latter does not understand it very well.

Based on this premise, I will mainly explain from the following three aspects:

Taking care of a child takes a lot of time and effort

Whether it is a public kindergarten or a private kindergarten, the time to pick up and drop off children is roughly half past seven in the morning and 16 in the afternoon, which is properly bumped into the work time. Due to the young age of the child, cross-infection is more common in kindergartens, and most of the class will be implicated if a child is recruited. A girlfriend once complained to me that since my child went to kindergarten, he had to go to the children's hospital every month to report.

In addition, all kinds of parent-child homework in kindergarten, parental talent PK, and various interest classes all take up a lot of time and energy. A friend of mine, with 2 children at home, each child signed up for 3 interest classes, and my mother simply made an excel** to facilitate pick-up and drop-off management.

I feel that my children are more important than my career

When is it best for working women to have children? There is no standard answer to this question. However, after the child goes to kindergarten, the mother has to spend more time and energy to accompany and educate, and the time to devote to the career will be relatively less, which is an unavoidable fact.

With the postponement of childbearing age, mothers who go to kindergarten to pick up and drop off their children are roughly between 30-36 years old, typical post-80s, who have worked for several years, have little seniority, and are oscillating between career and family. On the one hand, I look forward to the promotion breakthrough of the position, and on the other hand, I look forward to having more time to take care of my family. However, you can't have it both ways.

If you feel that your career is important, you must accept the brutal growth of your child, and if you feel that your child is important, you must return to your family and temporarily give up your career ambitions. <>

The powerlessness of the elderly in the family

After the opening of the two-child policy, many 421 became 422, with four elderly people and one or two children. If the elderly do not have the same concept of parenting as the young parents, which leads to a disharmony in the family atmosphere, or the elderly are unable to help take care of their grandchildren due to physical health problems, it is also the helplessness of some working mothers.

In short, there is no right or wrong for working mothers to choose to return to the family. Any choice is a mixed bag, and it's not the choice that matters, but what to do after the choice.

Finally, I'm going to give two little ones to stay-at-home momsRecommendations, resignation with a baby is not a flood beast, from another perspective may be a rare value-added period.

1.Stop the busy pace, review and adjust yourself, rethink your future life, set a small goal for three years, and a big goal for five years, because life needs dreams.

2.Make yourself better, exercise more, and improve your external image; Read more books to improve your connotation. After all, any child likes to see a mother who loves life; Any husband also likes to see a wife who can live.

Hope mine, helped.

According to my observations, my mother's absence from work is mainly caused by these reasons:

1.There is no support from elders

Usually, after the child goes to kindergarten, he does not need to be accompanied by his mother all the time. Mothers just need to send their children to and from school on time. Many families leave this task to their elders who have retired.

However, there are some family elders who are not around, or the elders are not willing to take on these things. At the same time, the mother's working hours do not allow her to pick up and drop off the children, and the mother can only choose not to work.

2.The job does not pay well

Some mothers have a high income themselves, and their elders refuse to help pick up and drop off their children, so they spend money to hire a nanny to pick up and drop off their children. There are mothers whose salary is not much different from what they pay to their nannies. From an economic point of view, they feel that it is better to hire a nanny than to take care of the children themselves, which is more reassuring.

3.Don't want to go to work

Some mothers are unhappy at work, can't find a sense of personal fulfillment, or don't want to go to work in the first place, and don't want to participate in social competition. It just so happened that there was a child to take care of at home, and the mothers simply chose to return to the family to take care of the child.

4.The family is financially well-off

Some mothers have good financial conditions at home, and the whole family thinks that her income from work is negligible. At the same time, the family hopes that she will not focus on her work and will devote herself to raising her children. As for making money, just leave it to the man.

Under this expectation, the mother was forced to choose to return to the family in impatience. <>

5.I want to spend time with my children

Some mothers don't go to work, it's purely an active choice. She enjoys spending time with her children. She hopes to give her children enough company when they are young, and when they grow up, she will come out to work and participate in society.

The reason why mothers don't go to work is a choice made based on their own family situation. I thought there was no comparison. It is up to each person to make the most suitable choice according to their own situation.

Many people don't understand the choice of stay-at-home mothers, why they don't return to the workplace after giving birth, but feel at home as a stay-at-home mother. In fact, there are two reasons:

OneThere are no elderly people to help watch the children. Some are because the physical condition of the elderly does not allow, and some are due to some other reasons that the elderly are unable to help take care of the children, in this case, mothers can only resign and take care of the children at home.

Some people say that it is good to wait for the child to go to kindergarten, at least there will be time to go to work during the day. The reality is that children leave school at 4 p.m., and it is definitely not possible if there is no one to pick them up. In addition, children who have just entered kindergarten will inevitably get sick at the end of three days, and no unit will be willing to hire a mother who often takes time off and is absent-minded to work.

IIThere is a generation gap with the parenting concept of the elderly, so they quit their jobs to take care of their children.

I have a friend who is considered an elite in the workplace, and after giving birth, he also plans to ask the elderly to help, but after getting along, he finds that the elderly's parenting concept is very backward, and it will inevitably cause contradictions and conflicts. So, I simply quit my job and became a stay-at-home mother. <>

After their children go to kindergarten, many parents will enroll their children in some interest classes, hoping that their children can be well-rounded and versatile. Therefore, the idea that children can be more relaxed after entering kindergarten is actually not correct. And when the child enters primary school, parents have to be even busier.

Elementary school ends earlier than kindergarten, and there are two afternoons a week when classes are closed. In addition to accompanying interest classes, I also have to tutor my children's homework and so on.

You seem to think that those mothers are lazy and unwilling to go to work, in fact, there is no way to go to work, after the child goes to kindergarten, you will find that there are really too many things.

After the baby goes to kindergarten, there are really many things in the school, and it really needs a parent to stay at home and be ready to obey the call of the kindergarten at any time.

Children go to school at 8 o'clock in the morning and leave school at 4:30 in the afternoon, so there are a few companies that give you to go to work after 8 o'clock, and then give you to leave work at 4 o'clock in the afternoon, right?

There are often events in the school, such as parent-teacher conferences, which may be held once a month, sometimes twice a month. Coupled with the performances in the school, children need to prepare for the show, parents also need to prepare the show, and they also need to find time to visit the school.

In school, there is either a holiday today, or tomorrow the parents go to school early, and there is something to say, the child pees his pants, or he is sick and has to be taken home quickly.

And the baby who goes to school is often sick, the child may often wait at home, and the baby does not go to school on Saturdays and Sundays, and the parents have to stay at home.

Where can you find a company where you can go to school at any time and ask for leave at any time? There are so many emergencies in kindergarten.

We often say that children go to kindergarten, that is, parents themselves go to kindergarten again.

Many mothers don't go to work after their children go to kindergarten in order to take better care of their children. There is another reason why. When the children were young, they did not go to work to take care of the children, and now they are derailed from society, and it is difficult to integrate into the working life.

They may have made some changes in their jobs during this time at home, especially for those who do fashion magazines. During the time they were with their babies, they did not pay attention to fashion information, so that they became closed and did not have access to new information and could not keep up with the pace of the market. <>

Although children have more time to spend in kindergarten, they are used to the life of husband and child at home. Maybe they find this kind of life more comfortable, and they are more comfortable at home without the pressure of competition in the workplace. They lack that ability to compete, they don't have motivation if they don't have pressure.

And most of the people who ask them not to go to work are the husbands, who enjoy the time when the off-duty wife has already cooked the meal at home, so they are reluctant to let his wife go out to work.

In general, the mother should start working after the child goes to kindergarten, or the mother will not work in the field after the child goes to kindergarten. But no matter which one it is, mothers still choose to go to work.

Although young people nowadays want to be full-time wives, most family situations do not allow it, and the financial pressure is too great now, and if you let your father work alone, the pressure is too great.

In addition, mothers are also paying more and more attention to their own development, and in order to have a common language between two people, be in the same class, and live a more satisfying life, they will also choose to go out to work.

But when the child is getting older, the child's education becomes the most important thing for the family. At this time, it is generally the mothers who choose to pay, give up their original jobs, return to their hometowns, and start over.

Just to be by the child's side, so that the child can experience what maternal love is, so as not to be by the child's side, and the child will not have a bad impact.

And the older the child, sometimes the grandparents' education methods may not be able to keep up, which will make the child develop some bad habits. If parents are by their children's side, their children may be better to their children, and for this reason, mothers will also choose to go home to work and stay with their children.

Because after the children go to school, they need to pick up and drop off the children to and from school, and they also need to communicate and communicate with the teachers, which requires too long daytime hours and is too inconvenient to go to work.

For every family, children are the treasure in the palm of our hands, and when the child goes to kindergarten, there must be a person among the parents to pick up and drop off their children to and from school, and the kindergarten curriculum is actually very speechless, the time to send children to school, basically has missed the time to go to work, and the time to pick up the child from school, if you go to work, there is no work at all.

After the child goes to kindergarten, parents need to communicate and communicate with the kindergarten teacher frequently, and the kindergarten often holds various activities, parents must not participate in the kindergarten for a long time, often participate in kindergarten activities, it means that if you go to work, you must often ask for leave, no company will allow employees to do this.

In addition to these things, all that remains is the hateful homework with the child. Kindergartens often assign all kinds of manual homework, and for children, these things must need the help of parents, if you go to work, how can you have the energy to accompany your children to do homework every day after work.

In fact, after the child goes to kindergarten, many mothers don't want to go to work, but no company will allow such people to work, come late and leave early every day, and often ask for leave, and they may not have the spirit during the day.

I don't know if I haven't experienced it, it's not easy to take a child now, wake up every morning, I have to be busy washing up the child, and then make breakfast or take her downstairs to the breakfast shop for breakfast, send the school bus at about eight o'clock, start to clean up all kinds of things at home, and go downstairs at about four o'clock in the afternoon to wait for the kindergarten car to pick up people, if you don't take the car, you have to go to the kindergarten to pick up.

If there is no elderly person in the family who is willing to help bring it, the mother can only give up going to work to take care of the children at home, the family wants to live, and someone has to go to work, after all, the father is still a minority, most men are not very good at taking care of children, or let them be responsible for making money, and the mother is better at handling housework and children at home.

When it comes to primary school, especially from the first grade to the third grade, it is even more troublesome, sent to school at eight o'clock, picked up at more than eleven o'clock, sent over at two o'clock, picked up at four o'clock, there is no school bus anymore, and do not worry about the children going by themselves, a day of light pick-up, there is no time.

Many mothers who give birth enjoy 4 months of maternity leave, some of them return to their original jobs after maternity leave, and some mothers resign directly to take care of their babies at home. Some women who stay at home with babies wait for their children to go to kindergarten and then go out to work, while others continue to work as full-time housewives at home after their children go to kindergarten.

There are several reasons why women who are usually working as full-time housewives even when their children are in kindergarten.

First, there is no elderly person in the family to help share the burden

Now the current situation in China, there are still more elderly people who help take care of children. After all, we still have a more traditional large family living model. Many elderly people live with their children and have little to do when they retire.

Naturally, he took on the task of taking care of his grandchildren. However, it is not the duty of the elderly to take care of their children, so as children, we should be grateful for the help of our parents. A small number of parents do not have time to take care of their children, some are taking care of other children's children, time conflicts, some have their own business after retirement, and some are even older.

So some women have to sacrifice their jobs to stay at home and take care of their children full-time.

2. Loss of ability to work

During the period of taking care of children at home, some mothers have completely occupied their time with their children, and have not arranged time for themselves to study and improve themselves, and after two or three years of full-time care of their children at home, they have completely derailed from their original jobs, so they will encounter many difficulties when looking for a job. I just found a job, and the salary was more than 2,000 and too little, so I simply continued to be a housewife. The husband becomes the main source of income for the family**.

Therefore, when the child goes to kindergarten and wants to continue to work, women must not waste their original work skills during the period of taking care of the baby, and must continue to learn and enrich themselves. In order not to be eliminated when returning to the workplace.

If you really choose to take the baby full-time, then please don't give up your dreams, give up your hobbies, and allocate your time reasonably, so that you can choose whether to be a housewife, rather than being forced to be a housewife.