Are there any jokes, the funnier the better, it s better to give low laughs, don t laugh badly!

Today, the school needs to fill out the family situation questionnaire, and one of my roommates fills in the mother's **. Surreptitiously filled in the father** column: Find my mother if you have something!

There are few bald hairs, but there are not many hairs, and they have to be taken care of when they grow. On this day, after balding at the hair salon, he asked the barber, "How much, please?"

Barber: "Ten dollars." "Bald in a hurry:

Other people have six dollars for haircuts, why should they charge me ten yuan? The barber smiled: "Scarcity is expensive!"

Once a friend brought her three-year-old daughter to my house to play, and the old man played games on the Internet, and the daughter was curious and came up to me and asked, "Uncle, what are you doing?" "Husband:

I'm playing a game! Does your mom fight? "Daughter:

No, she'll hit me. ”

The highest level of sleep.

When I was in high school, the Chinese teacher saw that the girl in front of me was sleepy, so he called her a question. She stood up without saying a word, and stood for two minutes, the class dead silent. The teacher said helplessly

Sit down. I saw that the woman sat down and lay down on the table and fell asleep immediately. At the end of class, the girl turned around sleepily and said to me

Just now I dreamed that the teacher called me a question. ”

A new young man from the company, brought a lunch box in the morning, happily said that he caught a mouse, I asked how to put the lunch box in the box without getting killed, he said that there was a cat next door to the office, let the cat scare it to death.

The exam teacher handed out the papers, and the girl behind took one more and shouted: "Teacher, I have it, I have it!" As a result, the boy sitting next to him said, "It's mine, it's mine!" ”…Hahaha!!

1. There is a student who is about to graduate from his senior year, but he still has no job and no girlfriend. So, he went to fortune telling.

You, ah, will be one.

The version is directly impoverished.

poured, until the age of forty ......“

The student's eyes lit up and he thought that there was a turning point, so he asked, "And then?" "Then you get used to it......“

2. A friend goes to fortune telling, and after the fortune teller touches the bones, faces, and counts the eight characters, he says, you fall in love at the age of 20, get married at the age of 25, give birth to children at the age of 30, and have a prosperous and peaceful family in your life.

This person was first shocked and then angry, and said: I am five years old Chinese New Year's Eve today, a doctor, a bachelor, and a man in love.

When he heard this, he pondered for a while and said, "Young man, knowledge changes fate. ”

Monday, February 30 Sunny.

Today, the sun didn't come out for a day, which was really bad, and my father bought back two goldfish, kept them in the water tank and drowned one. I'm sad.

Teacher's comment: Let me be even more sad, I live so big, I have never met 30 in February! You're so blessed to have met! And I've never seen a sunny day without the sun. I've never seen a drowned goldfish.

"Wife, Liu Xiang's race will start soon, you see that the contestants are ready to squat and start, let me finish watching it, let's do a good job? No, no, people want it now! The man had no choice but to turn off the TV and have a big fight with his wife.

After finishing the work, the man slowly turned on the TV, and then the TV commentator shouted excitedly: "Liu Xiang sprint!" Win!

Champion! 12.97 seconds!

Do you know what color Spider-Man is?

Red, wrong! It's white.

I don't believe you read the English of spider man: spider man (the one who is white).

Steamed buns and rice get married. The crowd was puzzled and asked why. Baozi: I went to the rice cooker to take a sauna that day, and I came across the rice that had just come out of the bath, ** that was white, that one was good, and it ended up sticking. If you like it, please listen.

Do you know how the slippery chicken came about? A chicken slides down the slope, and this is the story of the slippery chicken.

Go to Mi Reading Network to find it, a lot.

Funny hot jokes Huitian Listening Books *** Reading Jokes There are a lot of them on it.

Thank you for having a Chinese translation.

Hello I wasn't asleep when a group"wake up, sir!" "i wasn't asleep," the man answered. "not asleep

1. Speaking counts.

Man: "My dear, if you agree to marry me, you can meet any conditions." ”

Woman: "Does talking count?" ”

Man: "Of course it counts!" ”

Woman: "That's good! Please help me find a boyfriend who is stronger than you! ”

2 A woman is very ugly, she can't get married, and she hopes to be trafficked. finally made his dream come true, but he couldn't sell it for half a month. The kidnapper sent it back, she resolutely did not get out of the car, and the kidnapper gritted his teeth and stomped his feet: go, don't get the car.

3. There is a book called "The Pig Is Thinking".

4Once, as a man walked along the road, he saw a pile of things that looked like poop, so he squatted down and sniffed them, and it looked like poop; He picked it with his hand, and it felt like poop; He put it in his mouth again, and sure enough, it was poop. So he exclaimed, "It's good I didn't step on it."

The father fainted on the spot when he checked his son's English textbook!

A father was checking his son's English textbook and saw an extremely terrifying page: yes is dead. Nice milk dies.

Bus dad died.

Mouth mom died.

Girls brother died.

was I dead.

cheese－

Angry! does

All dead.