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It is still necessary to distinguish the source. Children are small, mentally and intellectually immature, and are easily influenced by the outside world. Children who grow up in the sound of beating and scolding will generally appear more withdrawn and taciturn.
But as he grows older, schooled, he will also have his own circle. Perhaps reticent at home or in front of acquaintances, and having a tendency to be brutal in an unfamiliar environment. To educate children, the traditional way is to produce filial piety under the stick, but it is more about persuasion education.
Today's children are precocious, and they can understand whatever you say. It's just about exercising their executive skills!! Wishing you a happy and happy family!!
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It depends on the situation, if she has siblings, and they are in the same upbringing, the older one will be self-reliant, and the younger one will be inferior.
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Compare low self-esteem ......When I grew up, I felt that everything I did was wrong, and my personality would be weird, and there was an example of this around me. To teach children correctly, it is better to get back the child's self-confidence as soon as possible.
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It will be affected, and if it goes on like this for a long time, the child may be more extreme, withdrawn, and even violent in the future. The life of parents is very important to the growth of children, so try to give him more love and touch, and sometimes you can try to let go of your parental identity and enter the world of children. Grow up with him.
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They are also prone to violence when they grow up, especially children who are often beaten by their mothers.
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Why did you beat and scold him?
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If a child is often beaten and scolded by his parents when he is young, he may have great flaws in his personality and may behave strangely. Such children have suffered a lot of damage to their minds and bodies, so when they grow up, they will have very extreme phenomena, and they are likely to be particularly demanding of themselves and become particularly self-disciplined, but there are more children whose personalities will become particularly rebellious, and their temper will become particularly irritable, and the whole person will become particularly withdrawn, especially inferior, and will be particularly insecure when getting along with others. <>
1. Children will become withdrawn
If a child is often beaten and scolded by his parents when he is young, he may become very withdrawn and have low self-esteem. Because parents are very important to their children, if parents often beat and scold their children, they directly deprive their children of their sense of security, and children are very afraid in their hearts, and they are always afraid that they will do something wrong and make their parents unhappy. Therefore, such children will often habitually deny themselves at work or in life, dare not try a new thing easily, dare not move forward when encountering difficulties, and it is difficult to establish a sense of trust and security when getting along with others, so things may not go too smoothly.
Second, the personality will become particularly irritable
Parents hit their children when they were young, and at this time the children had no power to fight back and parry, and could only accumulate the resentment in their hearts. But resentment is not eliminated, and when the child grows up to have a rebellious psychology or the ability to rebel, he will begin to do things against his parents, and when he encounters something unpleasant, he will be angry, he likes to disagree with his parents, he likes to talk back to his parents, his temper will become particularly irritable, and his personality will be particularly rebellious. <>
3. Be demanding of yourself
There are also a small number of children who are often beaten and scolded by their parents when they are young, and may become obsessive-compulsive disorder, and will sincerely thank their parents for scolding, and feel that this kind of education will make them better, feel that they have a lot of bad habits, and can reflect on their mistakes in time in the beating and scolding of their parents, correct their shortcomings, and will not do it again next time. Therefore, it is not impossible for such a child to grow up to be particularly demanding of himself and become a particularly self-disciplined person.
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It may make children have an inferiority complex, be afraid of doing things, and be unwilling to face new things, resulting in a relationship between parents and children that is not particularly good, resulting in a rebellious mentality, resulting in certain problems in learning.
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Later, these children will leave a shadow in their hearts, and the relationship with their parents is not very good, it is easy to give birth to a rebellious mentality, and when socializing with other people, their self-esteem is particularly strong.
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Later, he becomes very rebellious and may go astray, or his emotions become very irritable, and the child's mentality is not right, and there will always be various sayings.
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The original meaning of "filial piety under the stick" is to ask adults to discipline children strictly. This sentence has always been used as a mantra for adults to educate their children, but in fact, this sentence is actually wrong, and this kind of education is an irreparable harm to children. In fact, even in ancient times, there were a series of family laws for parents to educate their children, and children would only be educated with sticks after they violated the family law.
But now with the progress of society, there is no such thing as family law at all, and it is entirely because of the support of parents to educate children, which is actually very unfair to children. In educating children, it does not mean that you can't beat or scold, but you should use the right method, not blindly beat and scold.
The filial piety under the stick reflects the stick type of tutoring, which is a way to educate children by means of violent corporal punishment, which is the opposite of the honey type tutoring. In some families, parents' arrogance towards their children leads to their children's weak psychological tolerance, and some even lose their basic ability to survive. In this context, the traditional "stick education" has risen, and the strict education model of "wolf parents and tiger mothers" has been sought after.
In China, this is a relatively common and recognized way of education in both urban and rural areas.
The survey shows that on the question of how to view the phenomenon of parents hitting their children, some people think that it is necessary to punish and scare them slightly, and some people think that they should hit when they should be beaten to make children remember for a long time. The only one who thinks that educating children can not take the way of beating.
More parents believe that corporal punishment should vary from person to person, from "matter" to "matter", and from "age", and advocate that punishment should be appropriate, on the premise of not harming the child's physical health, and replacing beating and scolding with labor has become a more acceptable punishment method for children.
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Teach children to replace brutality with reason.
The advantage of communication: when the child makes a mistake, parents must inform the child that it is wrong, if the child does not know, it should be more detailed, the child understands, so that the child is really aware of his mistakes, so that the child can get something from it, and can also avoid making mistakes in the future.
Don't pass the pressure on your children: some parents may have some emotional fluctuations because of their work, if the child accidentally angers the parents at this time, parents may use beating and scolding the child to vent their emotions, which is also very harmful to the child, so what parents have to do is to learn to control their emotions, don't bring their emotions to the family, don't look at this small change, there will be great results.
Punish the child appropriately.
If the child makes a mistake and the parents want the child to bear the responsibility for the mistakes they have made, they can tell the child in other ways of punishment, such as if the child makes a mistake, you can deduct the child's pocket money for a period of time, or let the child think about it, or let the child do housework instead of being beaten, etc., and educate the child just to let the child recognize his mistakes.
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1. Consult your parents about everything, including major life events, and worry that your parents will be angry about their choices!
2. The personality type has also become irritable, emotionally unstable, sometimes good and sometimes bad, which is not conducive to interpersonal communication!
3. Broken jars, pessimistic on key things, unconfident, always feel inferior to others, because their parents have not recognized their own people, will it be good?
4. Extreme personality formation, long-term beating and scolding, may fight back, beat parents, contradict leaders, be withdrawn, do not know how to establish feelings between people, affect their marriage, friendship, career development, etc.!
Therefore, it is recommended that parents all over the world have more patience, after all, they are still children. Many parents require their children to grow up according to their own plans, but they don't know that children are natural, and various requirements will affect the play of children's nature.
A child is a minor, and in the eyes of adults, he may not be satisfied with adults in many aspects. However, what dissatisfies adults is precisely what they should be like as minors, and they should be guided and tolerated.
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First: the child will become grumpy.
Many parents either take care of their children alone, or they hand over their children to the elderly at home, and they usually can't control their temper because of their children's mistakes, yelling at their children, or can't help but hit their children.
It is not difficult to understand why children are always so irritable and always love to lose their temper. Because you gave the child an example, when I'm upset, when I'm depressed, I want to vent by yelling.
Parents are the best teachers for their children, and in the way you deal with problems in life, children will imitate your behavior and tone of voice on a one-to-one basis.
Therefore, if the child at home is short-tempered and likes to lose his temper, parents should not always think about how to change the child, but learn to control their emotions and change the child's family upbringing environment, which is fundamental.
Second: the child will become inferior, timid, and cowardly.
Children who are often beaten and scolded by their parents will become timid and cautious, and have no ego, because they are always in fear and do not know when they have done something wrong, and their parents' fists will fall on them;
I don't know if I will attract a lecture from my parents because of something wrong.
So, they are especially cautious and especially timid.
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A child who has been frequently beaten and scolded by his parents since he was a child will grow up to have a more extreme personality, and it is also possible that he will educate his children or others in the same way after he gets married.
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The child has a very low self-esteem, and doing things is to shake hands and be timid, because since he was a child, he didn't know what to do right or wrong in the beating and scolding of his parents, and he developed the idea that the child did not have this ability.
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When I was a child, I was beaten many times, some children will understand, and some children will hold grudges when they grow up. Both sexes.
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Children who grow up in such families will first become very inferior and timid. Don't dare to have your own thoughts. Be a man of the world.
Because his self-esteem has been seriously frustrated since he was a child, he has no self-existence. The second is such a child, who is not creative, because he has always lived according to the wishes of others and followed the rules. In the end, I don't know what happiness is, I don't love others, and I don't know what it is like for others to love me.
Because he grew up in a loveless family. There is no sense of well-being.
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When this kind of child grows up, he will desperately want to escape from his original family, but the impact on him, but when he wants to escape in the early stage, he has become the same as his parents when he was a child, which is the biggest sorrow of the original family, and he has been manipulated by this influence of the original family all his life.
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Children will become extreme and inferior in their hearts, easy to be timid in doing things, and easy to be unnatural when dealing with others, either very inferior, or excessively extreme, so I still hope that everyone can give children a healthy and happy childhood.
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Children who have been frequently beaten and scolded by their parents since childhood. When you grow up, you will have a shadow in your heart. It is not good for the healthy development of the child.
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When they grow up, they will have violent tendencies like this, and they feel that they are inferior to something, and children who don't feel the love of their parents will not feel the love of the world.
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Low self-esteem, in addition to the personality is easy to be irritable, the child is likely to imitate the behavior of his parents, and it is possible that this person is irritable and irritable.
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People's personalities are different, and the path of life when they grow up is also different, but it is still necessary to educate children to be rational.
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You may become introverted and introverted, and suddenly become manic after being triggered by something.
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Generally, such children are more traumatized and psychologically abnormal when they grow up.
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When you grow up, you will become inferior, timid, and extreme.
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When you grow up, you will have low self-esteem, violent tendencies, and fear of marriage.
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When you grow up, you will be very short-tempered. Not easy to get along with.
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There will be violent tendencies in the heart, and there will be more and more inferiority complexes.
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It can be cowardly, it can be violent
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It is true that there is no psychological problem, but this does not mean that there is no problem with rough beating and scolding education, and it is undeniable that each child has different characteristics. There may indeed be children who are more solid, thick-skinned, and have bigger hearts. Often beaten and scolded and still alive, mentally healthy, positive.
However, this is only a part of the children, and it is possible that they have not been negatively affected by the scolding. This does not mean that scolding education will not have a negative impact on all children, and it does not mean that scolding education is correct. And even if this part of the healthy child only sees that he has been beaten and scolded, we do not see that in addition to the beating and scolding education, he may have also received other ways of education from the upbringing members (such as gentle, encouraging).
For example, the care from grandparents and grandmothers, such as the influence and support from the external environment. When such children grow up, they generally do not easily use beating and scolding education. Because his heart is positive and sunny, and Shan Liang is gentle and powerful.
There are more ways and means for them to educate their children than just scolding. It was very good to be able to ensure good health in that era, who would care if you had psychological problems? Moreover, psychological problems are often not easy to detect unless they are particularly severe.
It is not like a physical problem that can be seen by the naked eye or an instrument, as long as it has no appearance, or the person himself does not admit it, it will not cause people to notice it at all.
In addition, people who are often beaten and harassed are likely to become perpetrators of violence. When he was weak, he was bullied, but once he had absolute power, he bullied others in the same way.
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