How to persuade children to learn to manage sick parents?

The child is like a little bird, you have been in charge of him, he will never fly by himself, you have to let him build up the wind and rain by himself, and when his wings are hard, he can fly by himself, you have been watching from the side, he is not in any danger, he himself does not want to change, he does not want to force his rights, so there is no benefit to the child's future, you have to let go when you should let go, there are such examples around you, junior high school and high school have been watching, because they are all going home, parents are forced to do homework and watch homework, The grades are not bad, but when he is in the third year of high school, he is going to live in the school, and his grades have plummeted, because he can't study himself, and his parents forced him to study, and now he feels free when he suddenly leaves home, and then it is conceivable that the results of the college entrance examination are not very good.

Once, when I visited my home, I found that the parents of a classmate were very fond of supervising their children's studies. As long as the child has time, parents will tell him to study and do not give the child time to rest at all.

That time I found out the problem, so I had a good chat with his parents, and then said to him: as a parent, you must give the child a certain space, you can't always let it be so busy, you have to let him have time to play, he can get in touch with the society, if you always control him, he is like a bird in a cage, he will never grow up, he will never be able to fly.

In short, it instilled in him a truth, managing children for a long time will only have a bad impact on the child, and even produce a rebellious mentality, which will have the opposite effect.

I think this kind of parents must see a psychiatrist, or when they were young, maybe because of their poor academic performance, their parents were very strict with themselves, and the kind of harm brought to them by the original family developed into their children when they formed a family. Don't let children learn for the sake of learning, let children learn in happiness, which is more conducive to the healthy development of children's physical and mental health.

For such parents, I think their approach is indeed inconsiderate, because learning is dependent on the child's own initiative to pay, rather than being oppressed by their own learning, otherwise for their children, there will not be much benefit, but disgust with learning.

Because I have such a friend around me, his family is a teacher, so I put a lot of pressure on him, so that every time he is in school, he doesn't play with other people, but studies silently by himself.

This is a case of over-interfering in children's learning and growth, which is actually very common in life. The most important thing is to make parents realize that they can't accompany their children for a lifetime, and more should cultivate their children's ability to be independent, let them grow up freely, and play a guiding role by themselves.

I think it's useless to persuade parents who control their children's learning to the point of being sick to let go! Because I am also a mother of a fifth-grade student, it is really difficult to let go of my child's learning now! Because first of all, the competitiveness is very strong, and as long as you relax a little, the child's learning atmosphere will also be relaxed, and if you don't study hard, your grades will be left behind, and now the children are too lacking in the ability to learn independently!

Therefore, persuasion is useless, I also want my children to have a good childhood, but when I think of the current social competition, it is really difficult to let go!

There is a scale for everything, and the so-called excess. If I persuade this kind of parent, I will stand in a mother's perspective and analyze the pros and cons with her, management is discipline is not a constraint, let alone supervision, management is a process, this process parents must continue to learn, because the threshold of parents is too low, do not need any examination to be competent, so they must continue to learn and improve, the child pipe pathology or become neurotic, this is a manifestation of unqualified.

If my friend is sick about his child's learning, I will say this to him, as the old saying goes, "If you tighten it, you will explode". "The extremes of things must be opposed" and "if you want to hurry, you can't reach it", the ancients knew that nothing should be excessive, and we should understand it even more! The child's learning is his own business, and parents can only play a supervisory role, not replace it!

If parents interfere too much, it will cause their children to rebel; It is better to adjust the mentality, fully mobilize the enthusiasm of the child's learning, and be a strong backing for the child! Trust your child and respect your child more, maybe your child will work harder!

Parents may be in order for their children to learn better, and they can go to the city tower in the future, but don't ignore that children also need space to breathe, they also need proper rest, to play to contact new things, the pursuit of academic performance may not achieve the results they want, but will educate "nerds", or rebellious children, should find more children's interests and hobbies, so that children can learn and grow in happiness.

We have to make these parents understand that it is very unfeasible for them to manage their children in this way. And we also have to give them a lot of examples to let them know that this kind of behavior can have a very bad effect, and it will also be very bad for their children in the future.

Parents should not be very demanding, which can easily lead to the child's rebellious behavior, tell him the importance of going to school, parents should guide him patiently and tell him the importance of academic qualifications.

It is the nature of every child to love to play, and it is normal for children not to like to learn, at this time we should not blindly force them to learn, but to guide them and accompany them to learn.

If the child is not willing to learn, parents should patiently explain to them the importance of learning, people are meant to learn, they should take school seriously, and lead them to learn.

The best way to teach children is for parents to be able to teach by word and deed, and influence their children with their words and deeds. Try to be a friend of your child, rather than blindly "managing" and "teaching", through equal communication, you can make parents have deeper contact with their children!

In order to discipline children correctly and effectively, parents need to pay attention to these points

Learn to praise children appropriately, we all like to be praised, and children are no exception. For children, praise means that what they do is recognized, and it also means that their behavior is liked, so they will do more of this kind of praised behavior in the future, so as to get the recognition of their parents. However, when praising children, parents should praise from the heart, and must not praise perfunctory, if this method is used to praise children, it will hit the child's self-confidence and make them inferior and cowardly.

Allow your child to make mistakes and say "no" to your child less

Practice has proved that instead of saying "no" to their children, parents should use real actions to tell their children how to do it, and tell their children with real actions, which will deepen their impression. Teaching children once or twice in a didactic way may still work, but over time it will make the child feel bored and rebellious. In addition, there are also children who are allowed to make mistakes, criticize them after they make mistakes, they know that they will be punished for doing so, and it will be more effective to teach children what is wrong and what is right than to preach.

When correcting mistakes, do so in the right way

Children make mistakes because they don't know that this is wrong, and parents need to correct their children's mistakes and pay attention to the correct way when correcting them. Tell them what the consequences will be in the end, instead of scolding them in the face, this way will not make the child realize that he has done wrong, and feel that he has been beaten and beaten, which will lead to a rebellious mentality. If parents use the wrong way to correct their children's mistakes, it can be counterproductive.

In short, in the process of educating children, parents must pay attention to the methods they use, and using the wrong methods will only make it more and more difficult for children to discipline.

When educating children, we must consider the problem from the perspective of the child, in fact, we should also give the child a positive response, so that the child can better accept, and also let them bear their own mistakes.

Parents must set a good example for their children, do not hit their children, do not scold their children, must educate their children scientifically, and cultivate their children's independence and independent learning ability.

Parents must be calm when communicating with their children. Parents need to let their children know that if their child makes a mistake, they must accept punishment first.

What's wrong with this society, turn on your mobile phone, and it's full of news of children killing people!And the parents of the children are still shielding their children and excusing their children. In fact, behind every problem child, there must be an incompetent parent!

If a child makes a mistake, he must be punished and let him understand that you must take responsibility for your actions, even if you are a child. Parents don't know how to educate their children, and society will definitely educate them fiercely.

1.Communicate effectively.

Let the child understand, why do I punish you, let him understand that there are some things that can be done, some things that cannot be done, and those who can't do what they can't do, they will receive punishment, and the next time they encounter the same thing, there will be a line of defense in their psychology: this thing can't be done.

2.Execute it now.

Immediate execution is the key to ensuring effectiveness, and if you make a mistake, you will pay the price, even if you are a child. The additional penalty will only make the mistake less effective. Public punishment can be avoided, but if you delay it for too long, don't expect your child to reflect on his own.

People seek advantages and avoid disadvantages, and children are no exception.

3.Consistent.

The same mistake will be punished today, and the next time it is made, it will be punished as well. This is how my father was punished, and so was my mother.

4.Hold the bottom line.

There are some basic bottom lines that must not be violated, such as stealing, such things must not be connived at, with the first time, there will be a second, third, and fourth time

Of course, all punishments are based on the premise of educating children, not as an excuse to vent their dissatisfaction, whether it is beating or scolding, it is not possible to hurt the child's personality, this is the bottom line, otherwise it will fall from one extreme to another.

Of course, it is best not to beat and scold the child casually unless it is absolutely necessary.

1.Communicate with your child.

Communication between parents and children is not only a simple conversation, but also a bridge to understand each other's situation, and it is also a channel for emotional communication with each other. When conducting family education, parents must communicate more with their children, and when their children are successful, they can communicate with them about their successful experiences; When your child is in a bad mood, you can communicate with him how to adjust his mentality; When your child encounters setbacks, you can communicate with him about how to face difficulties, etc. Through communication with their children, parents can understand the true thoughts of their children on the one hand, and enhance their feelings with their children on the other hand.

2.Activities with children.

In life, parents have many opportunities to do activities with their children, such as: shopping together, traveling together, going to the movies together, playing games together, going to the playground together, etc. As a parent, you must cherish the opportunity to spend time with your child, because not only will the relationship between you and your child be enhanced, but these activities will also be the best memories for you and your child.

Parents must not be stingy with praise and encouragement for their children. When a child achieves a success, parents should praise them in a timely manner, which can be verbal or material, and parental praise can increase the child's self-confidence. In addition, when the child is doing something challenging, parents should continue to encourage him, encourage him to dare to overcome difficulties, and the encouragement of parents will help the development of children's independent character.

4.Dare to apologize to your child.

When parents get along with their children, it is inevitable that they will do some wrong things for some reasons, and parents must dare to apologize to their children when they make mistakes, and apologizing to their children is an art. Apologizing to the child not only reflects the parents' respect for the child, but also sets a good example for the child, so that the child can understand the mistake and correct it.

5.Learn to be tolerant.

Since children are young and ignorant, it is normal for them to make mistakes. When a child makes a mistake, parents should not immediately criticize and blame, but should show them why they are wrong and how to do it right. In addition, the tolerance of parents can make the child feel guilty to a certain extent, and he will know what to do when he is faced with the same thing next time.

Discipline should be clear and prioritize: not too many rules, and keep them simple.

Discipline should be firm – but also friendly and considerate: in the vast majority of cases, stick to the rules you set. But when flexibility is really important for your child, there can be some flexibility.

Discipline be fair: because this is the best way to avoid your child resenting you.

Discipline consistently: Try to respond the same every time, and ask your spouse to do the same.

Discipline should be stable: Don't backtrack and be capricious.

Set a good example for your child: Act as you want your child to do.