One day away, I got engaged, but I didn t want to

This condition may be a premarital syndrome. Premarital syndrome is a common phenomenon in today's society, as the saying goes: love is easy to get along with, when the two love each other, really into the marriage hall, who does not sigh in their hearts?

Premarital syndrome is a variety of psychological abnormalities that appear before marriage, not everyone will have before marriage, it depends on everyone's mentality and psychological tolerance. And the manifestation of premarital syndrome is also different for everyone. The main ones are:

Suspicion, fear of marriage, anxiety, generation gap.

You're about to face a new lifestyle and it's normal to have premarital syndrome, so don't worry, as long as you're sure in your heart that you're in love, everything else is a trivial. As soon as this hurdle is passed, the symptoms will disappear. Of course, there will be many problems to face and solve after marriage, but no matter who you marry, there will be only problems, because every family has a scripture that is difficult to read.

So what you have to consider is whether you already have the emotional foundation for engagement and are mentally prepared for engagement. Here's a recipe for you:

Prescription 1: Give yourself an illusion of optimism. People are terrified of a future that they don't have control over. In fact, the way to deal with it is very simple, you might as well give yourself an optimistic assumption and imagination.

Prescription 2: Believe that you have the ability to cope, and gradually, your attention will be focused on how to strengthen your ability to cope with change.

If you are satisfied, thank you!

You don't need a psychiatric teacher.

What someone else has contracted for you, what you can't do on your own, these are all superficial phenomena, and what you can't decide in the end is whether you want to be engaged to him or not. This is the root of the problem.

Once you've figured it out, all other questions aren't a problem.

As long as you love him and want to be with him, face it bravely.

In this case, you have to think about it, do you really like this man? Is it just a premarital phobia, or is it not suitable at all. I am still young, think about it first, after all, it is a lifelong thing, and if there are children in the future, if you are still happy, it will be even worse.

Slowly get used to it. Blame me. If you choose this path, you have to go down and wish you happiness.

Ask yourself two questions: Do you really love him? Does he really love you?

If the answer is yes, none of these questions should be a problem.

Marriage is a lifelong thing, think about it before you do it.

It's not that you don't like that guy enough.

It depends on the situation if you don't want to get married after getting engaged:

1. If the man does not want to get married, he can take the initiative to negotiate with the woman to withdraw from the marriage;

2. If the woman does not want to get married, she needs to return the corresponding bride price and withdraw from the marriage.

If a request for the return of a bride price paid in accordance with custom is ascertained to fall under the following circumstances, the people's court shall support it:

1. The parties have not gone through the marriage registration formalities;

2. The parties have gone through the marriage registration formalities but do not live together.

When a man and a woman are engaged, the bride price is generally paid by the man's family to the woman's family. When a man and a woman form a property relationship, the actual owner of the property may be the woman, or the woman's parents, matchmaker or other persons. When the bride price is not controlled by the woman herself, it is difficult to return the bride price.

Not wanting to be together after getting engaged is a more troublesome situation that needs to be carefully considered. It can mainly be thought about and solved from the following aspects:

1.Reconfirm the feelings. Engagement is a very serious matter for Shi Mu Zheng, and not wanting to be together is often because of emotional problems.

This requires both parties to sit down again and have a good chat, sort out the emotional context, and confirm their true thoughts. Sometimes momentary doubts may also lead to the idea of not wanting to be together, and we need to give each other a chance to re-understand and clarify our doubts.

2.Influence of surrounding factors. Sometimes it is because of the pressure of work and life, less time with the other half, or some misunderstandings and estrangement.

In this case, it is also necessary to find out the source of the problem through communication, adjust life and mentality, and give the relationship a chance to ease and restart.

3.Advice from family or friends. Sometimes they are influenced by family or friends to have thoughts that they don't want to continue the marriage or relationship.

But that doesn't mean that's what you really think. You need to make independent judgments and don't follow the advice of others or you may regret it.

4.If you confirm that there is no room for recovery in your relationship, you must muster up the courage to confess the breakup with your partner face-to-face. The various arrangements in the engagement process also need to be properly arranged and rolled back at this time to reduce losses. After a breakup, you should also maintain due maturity and reason.

5.If the breakup is difficult to come to an agreement, you may also consider turning to a marriage counselor or legal process to reach a settlement agreement. But this tends to add to the overall hassle and loss, so if possible, it's still best to go through the breakup process in a friendly way.

Therefore, in general, if you don't want to be together after getting engaged, you first need to sort out your true thoughts and confirm whether the relationship is irretrievable. If so, rebuild mutual trust and communication; If not, have the courage to break up head-on and stay sane along the way to reduce any losses and injuries. It is a process that requires a great deal of courage and maturity, but it is also a lesson that must be faced in life at times.

The key is to make your own decisions and take responsibility for them afterwards.

If you're already engaged but don't want to be together anymore, you need to think hard about your feelings and decisions. Here are some suggestions:

Communicate openly and honestly with the other person. First, you need to communicate openly and honestly with the other person and tell them about your decision. If necessary, ask a friend or family member to help with the problem.

When communicating, express your thoughts and feelings as objectively as possible, while also respecting the feelings and opinions of the other person.

Respect the other person's decision. If the other person doesn't want to be together either, then you need to respect their decision. Don't try to force the other person to change their mind, and don't try to salvage the relationship.

Seek support and advice. This decision can leave you feeling lonely and confused, so you can seek support and advice from family, friends, or a psychologist. They can help you deal with your emotional issues and offer some helpful advice and support.

Keep your distance and be respectful. Even if you and the other person are no longer together, you need to maintain a certain distance and respect. This means not contacting or meeting again, and not putting pressure on the other person or hurting the other person's feelings.

Find a new purpose in life. Getting engaged doesn't mean your life is over, you can look for a new purpose in life and direction in Yangladong. This may include finding a new job, traveling, or social events to help you shake off the negative emotions and stress that come with an engagement reputation.

In conclusion, faced with the decision that you don't want to be together after getting engaged, you need to respect the other person's decision, and at the same time, you need to be calm and reasonable. By communicating openly, respecting the other person's decisions, seeking support and advice, keeping a distance and respect, and finding a new purpose in life, you can deal with this and start a new life.

If you're engaged and neither of you wants to be together, the best way to talk to each other is to talk openly and honestly about your feelings and thoughts. Find a suitable time and place to sit down with the other person and have a good conversation. In the process of conversation, we should respect each other's feelings, listen to each other's opinions, and try to maintain a peaceful and rational attitude.

If both parties agree to break up, then you need to consider how to deal with the engagement matters, such as banquets, rings, etc., and it is best to resolve them through friendly negotiation to avoid unnecessary conflicts and disputes.

Then talk to each other about the wrong marriage, which is torture for both of you. If two people have this kind of thought, to make it clear, if you can't be a husband and wife, you can still be friends, even if you can't be friends, you won't hurt the loss of peace, that is, a little money, of course, you have to play a little time, but compared to the rest of your life, the quarrel is still acceptable.

For the other party, it is difficult to find someone who doesn't like them to be reluctant to be together, and it is difficult to hold on to it until the end in the face of firewood, rice, oil and salt after marriage, but two people are together and separated, if there are children and each other's families, at this time and then separate, the person who will be hurt and the degree of harm will be much greater.

Two resentful couples are reluctant to be together, which is torture for each other, if they can't get together and disperse in the end, then there is one more enemy, and what about each other's families? Not very easy to get along with.

Therefore, when we face feelings, we must listen to our hearts, and we may combine because we don't understand, but if we find that the other party is not the person we want after understanding, we should also honestly explain it to the other party.

Since you have been engaged, you should get along well, and if you don't want to be together, you must explain clearly what the reason is and give the other party a reasonable explanation, otherwise the other party will not be able to get off the stage.

Large and small orders can also be called big and small appointments. What does it mean to be engaged with a small engagement and a big engagement? I will share it with you in detail, and what should I do if I don't want to get engaged the day before the engagement? Let us give you some tips.

1. What does it mean to be engaged to be small and large

1. Small order. Small order, can also be called Wending, delivery, small employment, etc. At this stage, the matchmaker has inquired about the marriage intentions of both parties in advance, and both of them are considered to be in love with each other. When it comes to the small order, the man will come to visit with Geng stickers, gifts, and letters of appointment, and the woman will hold a banquet attended by a few relatives and friends.

2. Large order. After the small order is completed, you can determine whether the two sides of the Geng paste are compatible, and after everything is correct, it will be time for the big order. Dading, that is, paying for the levy, is to be a big gift. The gifts and gifts prepared by the man are given to the woman at this stage, and the woman will also prepare a return gift.

This link, which is often said to be the bride price today, is a rather solemn process before marriage.

2. What should I do if I don't want to be engaged the day before the engagement

1. Communication between the two sides.

On the eve of the engagement, if there is some conflict between the two of you, then you may wish to communicate with each other first. If there is really no room for reversal after the communication between the two parties, then temporarily canceling the engagement is also an attitude of responsibility for each other.

2. Notify guests.

Once you've decided to cancel your engagement, the first step you need to do is to notify everyone you have invited. It's a good idea to call the other person to inform them that the engagement has been cancelled, explain the reason for the cancellation, and apologize for disrupting the other person's schedule.

3. Dispose of items.

To prepare for an engagement ceremony, everyone must have made a lot of preparations. Cigarettes, alcohol, melon seeds, candy and other things must be properly handled. If you book a hotel to hold an engagement, then be sure to negotiate with the hotel about refunds and other matters, and other snacks, flowers and other items can be given as small gifts to relatives and friends.

It is true that only when you have the idea of getting married, you will follow the process of marriage, and of course, there are people who get married directly by skipping the engagement.

Generally speaking, yes, getting engaged is a step before getting married, and you will only get engaged when you have the idea of getting married.

Yes, there are some local customs that get engaged first and then get married, and there are local customs that can directly skip the engagement and get married.

to further confirm the relationship between the parties and their future marriage plans. However, some people may also skip the engagement step and go straight to the wedding. Therefore, getting engaged is not necessary, but in some cultures and traditions, engagement is an important step.

If you are engaged, it is usually a day, but if you want to have a honeymoon for two people after the engagement, you can take a week off.

Related Notes:

Engagement is legally a contractual act, a status contract. This identity contract has several characteristics:

1. The conclusion of the marriage contract shall not be **, otherwise it will not have legal effect; In other words, a marriage contract can only be formed if both the man and the woman agree with each other.

2. Only those who have the legal ability to engage in engagement can engage in engagement. The legal definition of the ability to engage is based on age: a man is 17 years old, and a woman is 15 years old.

If a marriage contract is entered into in violation of this provision, the marriage contract is not invalid, but the parties or legal persons may apply to the court for revocation. Because, for minors under the age of 20, their marriage contract must be approved by the legal person.

3. The marriage contract shall not be enforced. The marriage contract should be observed, but it should also be in accordance with the wishes of both the man and the woman. If one of the parties is unable to perform, it cannot be enforced.

At this time, many people will choose to live together, but sometimes the old and the young have different thoughts, thinking that they should not live together if they are not married, so do they go back to their respective homes on the day of engagement, and my mother will not let me go to the man's house after I am engaged, right?

In fact, whether to live together or go back to each home after getting engaged is decided according to different places and local customs, and the custom in some places is that getting engaged is not much different from getting married, and you should live together, but in some places, even if you are engaged, both parties should go back to their respective homes, and then prepare for the wedding, and then live together after the wedding.

If the engaged mother is not allowed to live in the man's house, it is actually considered by the mother, because if you are not married, you will go to the man's house to live, so it is easy to be looked down upon by the mother-in-law's family, and even if you get married in the future, your status in the eyes of the future mother-in-law will be greatly reduced. Besides, in case there is a conflict in the wedding or bride price in the future, it is very likely to break up, if the two parties live together and then get pregnant, so it is very likely that they will choose to compromise because of the child in the future, and the mother does not want her baby to be wronged, so she is not allowed to live together before marriage.

Don't believe in any promises from boys before getting married, at this time you must do self-love, if you don't love yourself, then your mother-in-law's family will not love you even more after marriage, sometimes your mother's approach may be inconsiderate, but your mother is the one who loves you the most.