Ask for jokes that can deceive girls, and find jokes that amuse girls

The story of the White Rabbit.

One day, the little white rabbit mm went out to play, got lost when he came home, and came to a three-way intersection, and a little gray rabbit happened to come. Sister White Rabbit asked, "Brother Gray Rabbit, my sister is lost, can you tell me how to go?"

When the gray rabbit saw that the white rabbit sister was single, he said with bad intentions: "Do you want to know?" The White Rabbit said

Of course you want to know, just tell me. The gray rabbit said: "If you want to know, let my brother be happy!"

So, the white rabbit made the gray rabbit happy, and when he was done, the gray rabbit pointed to the left, and the white rabbit walked forward. After a while, the white rabbit came to a three-way intersection again, what can I do, there happened to be a little black rabbit again, so the white rabbit sister asked

Brother Black Rabbit, my sister is lost, can you tell me how to go? Seeing that the white rabbit sister was single, the black rabbit said with bad intentions: "Do you want to know?"

The White Rabbit said, "Of course I want to know, you can tell me quickly." The Black Rabbit said

If you want to know, let my brother be happy! ”。So, the white rabbit made the black rabbit happy, and when he was done, the gray rabbit pointed to the left, and the white rabbit walked forward.

The white rabbit came home, and soon after, gave birth to a litter of baby rabbits, guess what, what color the little rabbit is?

White? Wrong.

Black? Not right, guess again, gray? It's also not right, guess again.

Variegated? Not yet.

So what color do you say?

Want to know Want to know.

I want to know Let my brother be happy first...

If you're going to be a hooligan, do it.

What do you do with jokes?

If a girl lies, her breasts will grow bigger and her face will turn red.

Beasts are beasts, and it's better to do something directly.

2,,There is no joke.,The game has one.,Five fingers let people read in the order of your fingers.,It's me who thinks it's true It's reading It's a book.,Go over it in order.,And then scramble to some other .......

In the end, the key to making you a winner is to get out

That's me admit the book (lose).

So you win ...

I hope you succeed in teasing...

Is there a number greater than 10, she said.

You continue to ask a few more questions later.

Suddenly I turned around and asked her if she was more stupid than you.

She would definitely say no.

If you don't believe me, you can try.

4,1,Once upon a time there was a little white rabbit walking in the forest, met a little black rabbit, the little black rabbit asked her (to distinguish him from her) a question, but the little white rabbit could not answer, the little black rabbit said: Do you want to know the answer? The little white rabbit said yes, and the little black rabbit said:

Then if you want to, you have to follow me xxoo, so the little white rabbit agreed. After the little black rabbit told her the answer, so the little white rabbit continued to walk, and met a little flower rabbit, the little flower rabbit also asked her a question, the little white rabbit also did not know, the little flower rabbit said: Then you want to know?

The little white rabbit said to think about it, and the little flower rabbit said: Then if you want to know, you have to follow me ooxx, and the little white rabbit agreed again!

After a few months, the little white rabbit discovers that she is pregnant, so the question arises: what color rabbit will she give birth to? (Here comes the crux of the question):

You ask him, do you want to know the answer? She said, "Think? If you say it again, then you're going to follow me!

I am a lonely tree, standing on the side of the road for thousands of years, lonely waiting, just for one day when you walk past me, fall for you, and if you don't smash it, you will live in vain.

The hunter was about to shoot at the bear, but the bear said sweetly"Isn't it better to negotiate than **? What you need, say it.

The hunter put his gun down and said:"I want a fur coat. "Bear said:

It's not difficult at all, let's sit down and talk. "After a while, the bear patted his bulging belly and walked back:"Look, we're both satisfied, I'm not hungry, and you're wearing a fur coat.

Criteria for a successful man: 3 years old, no pants wetting; 5 years old, able to eat by himself; 18 years old, able to drive by himself; 20 years old, sexually active; 30 years old, rich; 40 years old, rich; 50 years old, rich; 60 years old, sexually active; 70 years old, able to drive by himself; 80 years old, able to eat by himself; 90 years old, does not pee pants. Hey, life is a reincarnation......

A small pot friend said: copying homework is not called copying homework, language is borrowing, mathematics is called analogy, English is called copy, geography is migration, biology is transcription, physics is the reference system, chemistry is called isomers, politics is called seeking common ground while reserving differences, history is the great unification of culture!

1 In class, an old man was playing with his mobile phone, unfortunately, he was found by the head teacher outside the window, and the head teacher did not want to interrupt the class, so he sent a text message to the classmate, intended to remind him. Unfortunately, the student didn't save the head teacher's **, so he replied to the text message: Who, go to class.

The head teacher replied: Look out the window! Dude replied:

Thanks, the head teacher is staring at it, and I'll talk about it after class.

The professor said...Today's class order is good, the only drawback is that·· If the students in the back can be as quiet as the students in the middle who are playing cards, there will be no noise to the students who are sleeping in the front.

One day, the three piglets built three huts to escape the big bad wolf. The big bad wolf didn't have much effort to blow down the grass house, the wooden house, and the brick house, and the three little pigs ran desperately, but they were still caught up by the big bad wolf. The three little pigs said desperately, you can do it.

We gave up, whatever you wanted. At this time, the big bad wolf smiled wickedly, kept his saliva and said: Then tell me that the little white rabbit is in **?

One day I parked my bicycle in a carport, and when I came back, the car was gone, only to see that the lock was thrown aside, the lock was not broken, and it could still be used, I thought it was a pity to throw away the lock, so I locked the lock on someone else's bicycle and left...

A child's diary: Monday, February 30 Fine. It's not good that the sun doesn't come out of the sun today, and the goldfish that my father bought back drowned one in a water tank, and I am very sad.

Teacher's comment: I'm also very sad, I've never met a 30th in February. I've never seen a sunny day without the sun.

I've never seen a goldfish drowned.

There is a very tall coconut tree, there are four animals, orangutans, apes, monkeys, and King Kong climb the tree to pick bananas, which do you think will pick first? Measure that you are that kind of personality. The answer is:

1. Monkeys are the most typical 250; 2. Orangutans are mentally retarded with few roots and tendons; 3. Apes are a precursor to Alzheimer's disease; 4, King Kong is a fool whose head is caught by the door; Have you ever seen a coconut tree grow a banana?

When the director of a psychiatric hospital heard that the leaders were coming to the hospital to inspect the situation, the director called a meeting of the patients of the hospital, and the director said: "This afternoon, there are very important leaders who are going to visit, and all the people must go to the door to welcome them. In Huan.

When we greet them, all the patients stand on both sides of the hospital gate, and when I cough, everyone drums together.

palms, the warmer the better; I had to stop all my stomping and not make a mistake. If everyone is ready, you can eat meat buns for everyone tonight, as long as one person messes up, all of them don't have buns to eat, remember.

Is it so? The patients in the audience shouted together: "Remember! ”

That afternoon, the leader arrived punctually, and when he walked through the door, the welcoming patient was already standing at the door.

With the cough of the hospital director, all the patients applauded and welcomed, and the atmosphere was very warm. Leaders who came to visit.

Infected by the warm atmosphere, he walked into the hospital with a smile on his face and applause with everyone. I saw that the leader had already entered the hospital.

As soon as the dean stomped his feet, the applause of the institute stopped, very neatly. Only the leader was still smiling and drumming.

As soon as he walked forward, the dean was very satisfied. Suddenly, a sick man as strong as Schwarzenegger emerged from the welcoming crowd.

The man strode in front of the leader, gave him a big slap in the face, and yelled angrily - "You don't want to."

Eat steamed buns! ”

The turtle and the snail are roommates. One day, the turtle was injured and asked the snail to help him buy medicine. Two hours later, the snail still hasn't returned.

The turtle scolded: "If you don't come back, Lao Tzu will die." At this time, the sound of a snail came from outside the door:

Besides, Lao Tzu won't go."

When I was in high school, one of the funniest things.

There will be no money, we often pooled money to buy cigarettes, that day my buddy and I bought a box of cigarettes and was about to go to the toilet to smoke, but it turned out to be class, it was the class teacher's class, forget the class first, I saw the guy sneakily writing a note during class, and then kneaded a large ball, and threw it at me.

was seen by the head teacher, the head teacher went down directly to take it away, stood on the podium and began to sweat, if I knew what was written on it, I would rather swallow it than give her head teacher a mouth: "Yak (my nickname, if there is a classmate on the barbar, you can recognize me)", the whole class burst into laughter ......

This pack of cigarettes will give ZJ two first, "The class continues to laugh......Except for ZJ, "I'm getting two sticks for the boss (a classmate's nickname, not really the boss)" The whole class continued to laugh......Except for ZJ and Boss.

Let's divide the two of us evenly," the whole class was already laughing and their stomachs hurt......The most classic appeared.

If you want a box, there is one less, and if you don't want a box, there is more," the class laughed and ......I was completely speechless......Embarrassment

Finally my girlfriend made a joke and laughed the day.

Three little white rabbits picked the umbrella, the big one let the little go to get some wild together to eat the small said: "I don't go, I go, you eat my mushrooms." "Two big ones said:

No, don't worry, White Rabbit goes. Six months later, the little white rabbit has not returned. said:

It doesn't come back and eats my door. He said, "Wait."

Another important year later, the little white rabbit has not returned. The two discussed: "Don't wait, let's eat."

At this point, the little white rabbit suddenly jumped out from the jungle next to him and said angrily: "Look! I know you're going to eat my mushrooms! ”

A few days ago, I had a few arguments with my beloved wife over a trivial matter, after which the two of them were very angry, and after nearly 50 hours of silence and coldness to each other, I confessed my mistake to my wife and wanted to end the cold war. After that, he asked his wife, "Wife, are you still angry?" ”

Unexpectedly, the two-year-old son parroted, turned his head and asked, "Wife, are you still angry?" ”

I had no choice but to point out the mistake: "This is my wife, not yours." You should call Mom! ”

The son seemed to want to quickly correct his mistake: "Mom, wife, are you still angry?" ”

Mom is mom, wife is wife, mom is not wife, wife is not mom. ”

Oh, not my wife's mother, are you still angry? ”

Didn't say that. Why isn't your mom a wife? Is it still a big girl? She's my wife.

The son looked dazed, but the wife reacted from a deep smile: "Son, you should say this: 'Daddy's wife, my mother, are you still angry?'" ’”

I couldn't stop laughing: "Is that what you call it?" How cumbersome. Son, remember, when you grow up, you will have your own wife to call, and now you can only call your mother! ”

The son really understood: "Mom, how long will it take for me to call you wife?" ”

Don't tell jokes on the beach, otherwise it will cause "sea laughter" I heard that washing your face with salt water has various benefits, and one day when washing your face, I sprinkled a large handful of salt into the water, and I was just about to wash it, but I heard my mother ask faintly: "Are you pickled meat?" ”

The dormitory is on the 6th floor, climb up and find that the key is not brought, go downstairs and ask the aunt to take it, and then climb up to open the door, go down to return the key, and then climb up, find that the door is closed, a classmate next door passes by, and asks, "Look at your door is not closed, I will help you close it." ”…

Xiao Ming asked Xiao Fang, "What kind of boy do you like?" ”

Xiaofang said shyly: "Just join the fate".

Xiao Ming was very nervous: "That, can't the head be a little square?" ”

Cao Cao felt a headache and went to Hua Tuo for treatment, and Hua Tuo said, "I want to cut my brain (cut the customer)." Cao Cao was furious after hearing this, and said, "You treat me and actually sing." Hua Tuo was cut down.

A student said: As soon as the team goes out to exercise in winter, it will be shorter, and one person replied: This is a common physical phenomenon, "What", "Thermal expansion and cold contraction!" ”

Girl, you haven't shaved your beard.

It's very simple, you tell him the one I love you and the one I don't love you.

A buddy uses a copycat machine, and the giant envy uses an apple.

It just so happens that the mobile store is engaged in activities: charge 699 phone bills to get Motorola, charge 799 to get Samsung, and charge 199 phone bills to get Apple.

Then the guy charged 199 and came back with two catties of apples ......

I saw a cold joke that when the East Evil meets the West Poison, it will always be a tie.

Once upon a time there was a eunuch below. Nope.

I love you is the best way to make it happy.