What are the root causes of marital conflicts?

1.Role expectations are different.

In the family member role, parents usually spend more time with their children. If you have different expectations about your role and that of your partner, there may be conflict when dealing with your child's problems.

2.The pace of life changes.

Wearing Hulawa will change the overall rhythm of family life, such as having to arrange food and sleep time for children according to a fixed schedule. If couples have different views on the pace of life, it can also lead to friction and arguments.

3.Personal interests and stress vary.

Couples have differences in personality, interests, social backgrounds, and this difference may become more pronounced when it comes to parenting. They may be at odds because of their different concerns or different qualities.

4.Children's health, education, etc.

In parenting, couples may face many decisions related to their children's health, education, and more. Since these issues are closely related to the future of the child, disputes can arise between couples when they have different positions.

5.Housework is unevenly distributed.

In the process of parenting, there are many things that need to be paid attention to, such as children's diet, hygiene, clothing, etc. If the housework is not distributed properly and one of the spouses is overburdened, it may feel emotionally and temporarily, leading to quarrels between couples.

6.Economic pressures are increasing.

Having children is a huge burden on the family's finances, which can also lead to greater financial stress between couples. They may disagree over what to do with the family budget.

To sum up, the implementation of good communication and the enhancement of family tacit understanding are effective ways to alleviate the tense and disturbing atmosphere between husband and wife.

In addition, the proper division of labour between husband and wife and the mutual understanding and support between family members are also positive.

In fact, the vast majority of marital problems come from the gap between the couple's expectations of each other and the reality. In reality, there is a law that no one really thinks that I am actually ugly, I am actually stupid, and I may live a very ordinary life in the future. On this point, don't be in a hurry to refute it, we must have said it, oops, I'm ugly, I'm stupid, I'm ordinary.

When there is no one, ask yourself yourself, and you will understand that in fact, what you say is just a risk front, and you just hope that others will not ask too much of you, and you don't think so in your own heart. When each of us gets married, we will feel that I should be able to find someone who is very good-looking, very capable, and has a good personality, and I will live a very warm and romantic life with material prosperity in the future.

What is the reality? The reality is that most of us overestimate ourselves to some extent, and then expect too much from each other and from our quality of life. This is the reason why after we got married, we were dissatisfied with each other and dissatisfied with life, and kept arguing and blaming.

When most couples have conflicts, both parties just see the missing part of themselves and hope that the other party will fill it for us, but they ignore how much the other party can give us? How much can we give to each other?

Many times we are reluctant to admit that the person we chose, he was not 100 points at the beginning, he was not so satisfied, and we ourselves could not achieve the full score that the other party expected. In fact, these are not only after marriage, but if we don't grow up and remain excellent, our own conditions should match the current unsatisfactory life, which cannot only be blamed on the other party, we also have a great responsibility. Just look at Maslow's, uh, the theory of needs, the man with great ambitions, who easily transcends material needs, security needs, love and belonging needs, and they are already pursuing respect and self-realization, what a higher need.

The root cause of the conflict in the relationship between husband and wife is that the trust and understanding between two people have been lost, and when you are with your lover, you must understand them more.

Two people lack communication in life, and they will not take the initiative to talk to each other when they encounter anything, nor will they take the initiative to find each other to solve it, and in the end they will have very serious contradictions.

It may be that two people don't love each other as much as they used to in their hearts, or it may be that some trivial things in life have affected the feelings of two people.

Quarrels between husband and wife are common, and only in this way can their marriage be energized and not a pool of stagnant water. But everything must have a degree, if you do too much, there will be problems, and arguing too much will also lead to unimaginable consequences. Therefore, when there is a quarrel or dispute or conflict between husband and wife, you must remain calm, be objective, and not be swayed by emotions.

In whose hands is the finances of a family, this is a question that can easily lead to contradictions. The foundation of marriage is the economic foundation. Marriage is like a fortress, and how strong it is depends on its foundation.

To put it simply, it refers to whether the economic foundation of two people is strong enough. As long as a family's economy and income can meet their daily living expenses and have a certain surplus, then their life will become colorful.

The ultimate ownership of family finances is directly related to the happiness of married life. Everyone has their own problems, and each family has its own solutions, which cannot be generalized, but must be dealt with flexibly. Anyway, this matter still has to be discussed.

Whoever is in charge of the family's finances should not be too restricted. On the contrary, it is easy to cause disputes between husband and wife, or even divorce.

Whether the husband and wife have the same living habits has a crucial impact on the stability and sustainable development of the marital relationship. Many couples have conflicts because of the different living habits of two people. For example, one person likes spicy food, and the other doesn't like spicy food; One is fond of staying at home, and the other is fond of outdoor activities.

When a couple has a child, issues such as the way the children are raised can easily lead to disagreements and conflicts between the husband and wife. In modern China, most marriages are "male and female". This has led to some deficiencies in the family, especially in the education of their children, which most men do not pay enough attention to.

Women are mostly housewives and take care of their children at home.

The difference in education and upbringing between husband and wife can lead to irreconcilable conflicts between the two parties. The solution to this problem is for men to return more to their families and share the responsibility of raising and accompanying their children with women.

The first is that the husband and wife are not used to sharing, the two people talk less and less, and will not share some daily things with each other, the second is that the two people do not agree on their ideas, and the third is that both of them are too selfish and do not think about each other.

The husband and wife do not communicate often, the relationship between the husband and wife is weak, they don't like it, and the husband and wife have no common interests and hobbies.

Mainly because two people do not communicate with each other, and they are often calculating and lacking a sense of security, conflicts will occur.

There are three reasons why it is easy for husband and wife to have conflicts, the first is that the husband and wife are unfaithful to their feelings, the second is the difference in three views, and the third is the problem of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.

First,Societal megatrends have had a big impact on marriage.

At present, there are many people who truly love each other, but there are also many people who make transactions with love, and the divorce rate is getting higher and higher. Under this social trend, people are increasingly losing confidence in marriage and family, and there is no common goal and hobby, so that many young people are at a loss.

Moreover, women's sense of self-independence is getting stronger and stronger, and many women are no longer willing to sacrifice themselves for marriage, family, husband, and children, which will also bring new challenges and crises to some marriages.

Second,We are self-centered, and we look at everything with our own needs as the starting point.

Every couple hopes that love will last forever and unswervingly when they first get married, but it is not easy to really do this, and it is very difficult to be self-centered to make couples love to the end of their hearts.

Clause.

Third, the understanding of the husband and wife is not enough.

On the one hand, do not understand each other's families. What kind of family you were born into, what kind of family your spouse was born into, and what kind of growth experience each other had, you don't know very much about these, and you won't understand, just because of love, you walked into the siege of marriage ignorantly, without fully considering the differences in family backgrounds and growth environments of both parties. On the other hand, not mentally prepared.

Many people think that getting married is a natural thing to do, and they don't fully understand the difference in married life. Therefore, both parties should have an objective expectation of married life before marriage, think about what problems may arise in the future, and give them what may happen after marriage. Contradictions and conflicts should be vaccinated against each other, so that it is conducive to detecting some problems after marriage.

Fourth,Not fully understanding each other.

The differences between men and women, the differences in ways of doing things, communication skills, how to resolve conflicts, etc., all need to be understood. Many couples lack communication skills, and they naturally do not know how to solve problems when they encounter them, and there will be more and more problems. For example, a husband and his wife drive out together, but the husband never asks for directions, even if he is lost.

The wife is often so surprised that she loses her temper.

Actually, it's not just the gentleman's problem, it's the man's problem. Men don't like to ask for directions, they think that there are problems to solve by themselves, and it is very shameless to ask others to seem incompetent. If you understand their psychological motivations, it will be easy to resolve the conflict.

We all know that after getting married and having children, husband and wife are independent individuals, and neither will sacrifice themselves for anyone. But with the passage of time, there will be more and more contradictions between husband and wife, and even some contradictions will explode to the point of irreconcilability. There are many kinds of contradictions

Domestic violence, personality incompatibility, financial problems, and more. Today, let's talk about what contradictions in marriage can be resolved?

1.Domestic violence.

Some people may not understand the term domestic violence, because in our impression, there is very little domestic violence, but it is not. In fact, in many cases, it is normal for couples to have some small friction between them, but if both parties cannot communicate about this in time, then there may be a high probability of violence. And this kind of violence is often controlled by women.

2.Personality incompatibility.

Some people have an impatient personality, and some people have a gentle personality, but their marriages are sweet after a period of time. Although their personalities are incompatible, it is not a big problem. They can get along slowly and understand each other's minds, so that the marriage can last a long time.

3.Economic issues.

In today's society, the salary income of husband and wife is a very important expense. Although no woman wants to lose her freedom for the sake of her family, if she can't even take care of herself, how can she take care of her children? Therefore, financial issues are very important for conflicts between husband and wife.

Many people say that it is difficult for men to earn money, but this is not the case, and many women know that it is not easy to earn money. If a man is willing to give you everything he has, it means that he is a person who is worth entrusting for life.

4.Economic problems.

When a woman gives birth to a child for you, when you want to earn money at home to support the family, when you want to give your child a good education, when you want to give yourself a good job. And when you feel aggrieved when your husband earns money for you to support the family for the sake of family harmony, when you feel aggrieved when you pay a lot for the family. These are all contradictions that money cannot solve.

5.Children and the elderly.

Many elderly people are very hard to take care of their children alone, sometimes they are not as good as young people, and sometimes they dote on their children. When the child grows up, he will often complain that the person who takes the child is not good, he can't do it like them, and they are not willing to let the child suffer. If there is a conflict between husband and wife, they should understand each other and be considerate of each other.