I am often on duty, and I feel ashamed of my wife and children, how can I adjust my guilt?

It can be seen that you are a good man who loves his family, his wife and children, and he feels guilty about them because he is busy with work, which proves that you are really a very good man.

Now how many men in society are busy trying to earn money as a reason to ignore their wives and children, if their wives and children complain, they still feel particularly unreasonable, like you is really rare, your wife and children are really happy.

So what are the ways to alleviate this guilt of you, this is very difficult, because you have no way to change the situation that you have to be on duty, your guilt emanating from the heart as long as you love them, this guilt will always exist, you have no way to eliminate this feeling, you can only try your best to make up for them.

When you are not on duty, you can go out with your wife and children, take your child to visit parks and zoos, take him to eat whatever he wants, and spend more time with him.

The role of the father in the child's growth process is also very important, the father's influence on a child can cultivate his tenacity, perseverance and strong character, you can accompany him to read and write homework when you get off work, if you are really not free, you can also use the time of the lunch break at work to give the child a **send a ** or something.

As for your wife, I believe she should understand you very well, and if you can't spare time, then you have to care more about her in the details of life.

For example, on your wedding anniversary, you may not be able to accompany her out to dinner romantically, but you can order flowers, send gifts to her, and ask for a courier to send to her. When you get home from work, you can help her with housework, usually hug her more, hug her and tell her that you love her very much.

These small gestures do not need to take up a lot of our time, but they can make the family feel that you always care about them and that you are always by their side. That way, they feel grounded, and you don't have to feel too guilty, so that's fine.

When I saw your problem, I thought of a sentence, I can't hold you when I move bricks, and I can't move bricks when I hold you. Nowadays, there is a lot of pressure in society, and the major pressure mainly falls on men, and it is common to work hard outside and work overtime in order to maintain family life and improve the quality of life. The wife also has a great responsibility, taking care of the children at home and taking care of the housework, which is a backstage guarantee for our men to work outside.

It is true that the time with his wife and children is short, and he feels guilty in his heart, so he squeezes out a little time to play with his children and do housework for his wife, it doesn't matter if the man is tired. You always have time to go home when you are always on duty, go home and buy more gifts for your children and wife, even if you have a day off, get up in the morning to prepare a nutritious breakfast for your children and wife, you must do it carefully, don't do that kind of ordinary, do creative, you can check it, learn it online, I believe your wife will be very moved. And usually don't ask for leave, but when you meet your wife's birthday or child's birthday, you must take a day off to accompany them, and don't spend money on a restaurant to eat, it's best to spend some time to go to a theme restaurant, drink a glass of red wine, and say hello to the restaurant in advance to give them a surprise.

It's best to turn off your mobile phone when you're with them, and don't take the emotions of work with you at home. You can play games with your child, take her to amusement alone, and happiness after being tired cannot be exchanged for money.

Working overtime is also contributing to the family, you are working hard for your wife and children, I believe that as your wife and children will understand you. After all, it is not easy to survive in this society, and the pressure of life is so great, you don't need to feel guilty and feel ashamed of your wife and children. But then again, the premise is that you don't mess around outside in the name of overtime, and do that kind of thing like having a home outside or a colorful flag fluttering outside.

For a woman, as long as her husband does not betray her, it is already the greatest comfort, as long as you do not do the most taboo thing in marriage outside of marriage, then your wife will not not understand you.

As long as you sit upright, then the work is for yourself and your family, you have to look at this problem from a positive perspective, if you don't go to work and you don't work overtime, then where does the family's expenses come from? If you don't work overtime but accompany your wife and children at any time, then your family will be particularly financially constrained, and such days will make everyone anxious. If you really feel sorry for your wife and children, then it is not easy to understand your wife at home after your hard work, women more often need their husbands to be their own listeners, listen to themselves confide in the bitter water of life, even if you are not free when you are not free, then no wonder you, but you must do a good job of being a husband and father when you are free.

When you have time to come home and help your wife with some housework, maybe help take care of the children when your wife is busy, so that the children will be willing to be close to you, and your wife will be more grateful to you. The relationship between husband and wife will be very stable, remember that whether a family is happy or not is in the hands of men, if you do your duty, then the warmth of the family will be handed over to the wife, and she will make your family warm. Everyone is working hard for their children, so it is enough to support each other and understand each other.

I think you should think about how much work, family, and life are in your eyes.

Generally speaking, work should take up one-third of your time, and the remaining two-thirds should be rest, family and life, but now because of frequent overtime, work takes up more than one-third of the time, and one-third of sleep is the same, so the time to compensate the family is less and less.

And your weight in life, family should not be the most important.

If family is paramount, you may consider quitting your job to spend time with your family.

Of course, quitting your job is not the best way, and regulating your guilt is not something you should consider, because what you need now is not to adjust your guilt, but to adjust your time with your wife and children.

First of all, maybe your work is very important, so your family members can be regarded as supporting your work, even if you don't have time to spend with them, they still support you, and there is no quarrel, because you should not feel guilty because of the quarrel, is it because the family supports you that you want to continue like this, just to regulate your guilt?

What you have to do now is to choose a family or a job, not just to choose one, but to know which one you care about, and be willing to give up this for the sake of another, just like you now work overtime every day for work, rarely spend time with your wife and children, I hope it can be reversed.

Then, I would like to say, if you really want to regulate your guilt, find time to spend with them, your wife, your children, they are the most precious thing in your life, and the second is your job.

It's a bit strange to look at the problem, don't ordinary people feel guilty, and then make time to spend with their wives and children, do you want to take away your guilty feelings, and if you don't have guilty feelings, you won't feel ashamed of your wife and children?

If you really just want to regulate your guilt, I really don't have any good advice, I can't let you get a divorce, you won't feel guilty in the future, how good! But you still have a sense of guilt, which means that it is not too bad, in fact, what you need to think clearly is how to adjust work and family, I think you must feel that work is very important now, because you have to support your family, and you are also in the rising period of your career, and you can slowly do your best to give your wife and children a better economic conditions and living environment, this is actually not wrong in theory, you are still a motivated young man worthy of praise.

But emotionally, in fact, you ask yourself, is there really no time for your wife and children? It's a machine, and there is a time to rest! You can take time, but you may be too tired, sometimes you want to rest by yourself, you don't want them to disturb your rest time, if so, you can tell them your feelings, I think your wife and children will understand you, quietly by your side, will not ask for anything, this kind of companionship is also companionship, not necessarily have to accompany the children to play, to make trouble.

When you are intimate with your wife and children, even if you don't talk, you will feel very comfortable staying together, this sense of guilt will naturally disappear, even if you really don't have time, cover the children with a quilt at night, and say thank you to your wife, these are the best gifts for them, it is spiritual comfort, and it is much more intimate than some activities or gifts.

If you often work overtime and forget your wife and children at home, then you need to accompany them, because children also need the care of their fathers, and it is not easy for your wife to take care of the children at home and do housework. So be sure to spend time with them.

Now many families will be separated from their husbands because of earning money, sometimes they rarely get together with their husbands, a woman takes care of the children at home, does housework, after all, sometimes she will take care of her in-laws, at home for a day, sometimes even feel more tired than going to work, because women with children are more hard and tired, so as a man, you must often call ** to greet them. See if they're okay at home!

No matter how much overtime you have, no matter how tired you are, every time you go home, it's best to help your wife take care of the children, help him, and share some housework, so that he can feel that you are still better for their mother and son. Then she is more comfortable with the children at home. As long as you are good to your woman, then it is worth it no matter how much he pays for you.

If you don't care about them often, then your wife will think that she has paid so much at home and has never been cared for by you, then he feels that everything he has done is in vain, and the children, if you don't greet the children often, then the children will grow up more and more without topics with you. Child, it will feel strange to see you. As long as you treat a child well, he will also know how to be grateful, no matter how busy and tired he is, don't neglect to care for his child!

If you want a family and harmony, then as a father, no matter how busy and tired you are outside, you still have to accompany them often and take care of them, so that people will be happy.