Someone help me change this poem! Help revise the poem. Thank you!

Then I really rated it.

Such a counterpoint of poetry makes people think that you are writing poetry for the sake of writing poetry, and it is too vulgar to write lyrics. Due to the pursuit of reconciliation, some feelings have to be discounted.

Thinking of the warmth you gave, I feel that the theme of changing to the warmth of the past suddenly became clear. If there is no logical relationship between the second sentence and the third sentence, it is more difficult for people to follow your thoughts, which is a fundamental mistake.

Retain the last trace of comfort, at this time it is definitely not enough to use comfort, it is better to be self or reverie.

But it has been a repetition of things, but it is a standard repetition error. If you really want to reconcile the accounts, you can change it to "powerlessness is what is wrong", and you feel that powerlessness is better than impatience, which shows that you are exhausted.

Wandering on empty street corners, another basic mistake. Empty street corners are still reasonable, just imagine, the antonym of empty is full, if you say full street corners, do you think it works? Therefore, emptiness must be changed, otherwise the lack of ingredients will distract people's attention.

I think changing to damp and cold comes in. There is also uncertainty about the mood.

The standing joke is a big joke, and you must be inconspicuous and ignored in this kind of atmosphere, but if you flip through the dictionary, you will know that it means upright and towering, and you should wilt in frustration! Standing is right, which means standing for a long time.

The journey has already begun to be lonely, why not change to the beginning of the journey, but it is already lonely?

Anyway, I don't like such a regular way of writing, and I don't feel like I'm emotional, it's just a more contrived feeling.

The poetry is too old, so it needs a modern feeling.

Open your arms to the wind.

I miss your warmth.

Let sorrow wander alone.

。I don't know how to change what I wrote.。。。 Haven't experienced much of this.

Lonely street corner, lonely huddled with sadness...

That sad year.

That year, I graduated.

The camphor tree in the yard pulled out new green shoots.

Mother with her warm hands.

Kindly stroked my long hair.

I saw the tears in her eyes.

Child, when you grow up, you should learn to be brave".

Suddenly, I felt like a giant rock growing up.

It weighed heavily on my fragile mind.

That year, my childhood ended.

The thick shade of the trees obscured the blue overhead.

Father's expression froze.

Standing beside me with a little sadness.

I heard his heavy sigh lingering in my ears.

Child, when you grow up, you should learn to be strong".

At that time, I felt that my growth was like a bottomless spring.

Flooded my tiny body.

That year, I grew up.

On the dark green branches is a dappled sun.

I stand at the feet of my childhood.

Count the sorrows with grief.

Yes, I grew up and should learn to be brave and strong".

At that time, I felt that growing up was like a rumbling summer rain.

It drenched my whole body.

I think, I've really grown up.

This little woman has a song, I don't know if I want it?

Father, my dear father, your broad-mindedness is what allows me, the lonely me, to return to the safest haven!

My stern father, your earnest teachings are what made me, naïve.

Know the most profound truth!

Your guidance, my learned father, is to enable me, the ignorant, to enjoy the most infinite knowledge!

My kind father, one of your words of laughter is exactly what makes me, bored, hold my stomach and laugh the most happily!

Father, I love you!

Looking down at the ancient city of the South China Sea, it seems to be a streamer and tactful, lighting up the land of China!

The history that falls in the dust is his brilliance, the grandeur in the eyes is his spirit, and the beauty floating under his feet is his posture.

The ancient willow of the city, the green of the water, and the blue of the porcelain.

Looking at the ancient city of the South China Sea, like a bright pearl, inlaid on the land of China!

History is its style, grandeur is its charm, mountains and rivers are its spirit, and beauty is its posture.

The rhyme of the sea, the blue and the sky.

Quiet, like the jade of the emerald tree, noisy, like the flow of boiling.

The beauty of the sand, a thousand acres of paradise, a vein of gold.

Near, caressing the charm of the fingers, looking, welcoming the dazzling brilliance.

The interest of the stone, the ingenuity is unique, and the craggy and varied.

Strange, that is, unique in the sea, strange, taste the world unique.

The city is ancient, simple and clumsy, elegant and vulgar.

Lane, bluestone moss green, suburbs, shade cover clear bells.

Celebrate. The birds are singing beautiful songs, the flowers are smiling, the apples are wearing fiery new clothes, and the blue sky is dancing with beautiful butterflies.

1.3 billion children.

Celebrate this wonderful day, October 1st

Mother's birthday in the motherland.

In the spring, the head poked out of the tender green grass.

In summer, a hand is stretched out from the little flowers on the branches.

In autumn, it flew out of the falling leaves.

In winter, the body sticks out of the snow.

What a season.

I really can't help this:'(