What are the psychological effects of divorce?

Very big impact, every day I want to get divorced and have nothing to do, I have seen a psychiatrist a few times, and now I don't see it, it's useless. I always think that I don't have to be so painful when I die, and I don't have the slightest nostalgia for this world.

Divorce will make people change reality, no longer believe in love, no longer believe in promises.

When I got married, I thought that I could always love each other for a lifetime, I thought that marriage was the sublimation of love, I thought that after getting married, two people would become more intimate, and I thought that we could spend our lives together. I thought that I would never be lonely again in this life, and I would never be alone again.

But after getting married, I realized that marriage is not only about love, and marriage is not the sublimation of love, but has become a killer of love. When there are many unsolvable conflicts in the marriage, the two eventually come to divorce.

And after the divorce, the two of them have become realistic, and they no longer believe that as long as there is love, they can defeat reality and defeat all, and they begin to feel that love is really ridiculous, and they begin to feel that they were really stupid at the beginning.

They no longer believe in love, so there is only reality left in life, and the man may find a woman who will help him, or even if he remarries, he will marry if all the conditions for marriage are favorable to him. For example, the house will never add a woman's name.

If someone courtes, the first thing she looks at may be whether the person can let herself live the life she wants to live, see if the man can make her life better, and marriage will also take into account all the favorable conditions for herself, such as the house must add her own name, the bride price must be set by herself, and so on.

Divorce is like this, turning two people who used to be love-first into people who spurn love, even if others use deep affection, they can't enter her closed heart.

People who often talk about divorce most of the time want to scare each other.

Maybe I'm really tired and want to break out of the siege. Maybe the heart is still at home, and when you quarrel, you like to talk about divorce.

Either way, the mention of divorce is very hurtful. Both parties should seriously review themselves, even if they are really divorced, they don't have to talk about divorce all day long.

After divorce, there will be the following consequences: the relationship between husband and wife will be dissolved; change in marital property relations; division of property in the event of divorce; Settlement of debts in the event of divorce; Child support after divorce. In addition to the above points, it will also involve changes in social life, scene and psychological changes after divorce.

Divorce has little impact on the woman, now is the era of freedom of marriage, divorce and marriage belong to the freedom of marriage, if the woman wants to divorce, you can discuss with the man, distribute the property, and custody, and then go to the Civil Affairs Bureau to register the divorce, if not, you can also take the way of litigation divorce to solve. Divorce traumatizes oneself, traumatizes the other party, traumatizes one's view of marriage, and is also a trauma to one's own life. For the trauma of marriage, you will feel that marriage is so troublesome, there are so many contradictions in marriage, and you still have to divorce in the end of marriage, afraid of love, afraid of marriage.

Divorce will think that you are a failure, there is no failure in marriage, there is only a good and bad marriage, and a comfortable and uncomfortable life.

Legal basisCivil Code of the People's Republic of China

Article 1076:Where both husband and wife divorce voluntarily, they shall sign a written divorce agreement and apply for divorce registration in person at the marriage registration authority. The divorce agreement shall clearly state the parties' expression of intent to divorce voluntarily and the consensus on matters such as child support, property, and debt handling.

Article 1079:Where one of the husband and wife requests a divorce, the relevant organization may conduct mediation or directly initiate divorce proceedings in the people's court. People's courts hearing divorce cases shall conduct mediation; If the relationship has indeed broken down and mediation fails, the divorce shall be granted. In any of the following circumstances, if mediation fails, a divorce shall be granted:

1) bigamy or cohabitation with another person;

2) Committing domestic violence or abusing or abandoning family members;

3) Having bad habits such as gambling and drug addiction that they have repeatedly taught and not changing;

4) Separated for two years due to emotional discord;

5) Other circumstances that lead to the breakdown of the relationship between husband and wife. Where one party is declared missing and the other party initiates divorce proceedings, the divorce shall be granted. Where, after a people's court has ruled that divorce is not permitted, the parties have been separated for one year, and one party initiates divorce proceedings again, the divorce shall be granted.

Article 1085:After divorce, where children are directly raised by one party, the other party shall bear part or all of the child support. The amount of the cost to be borne and the length of the period shall be agreed upon by both parties; If the agreement is not reached, the people's court shall make a judgment. The agreement or judgment provided for in the preceding paragraph does not prevent the child from making a reasonable demand to either parent in excess of the amount originally set forth in the agreement or judgment when necessary.

Article 1086:After a divorce, the parent who does not directly raise the children has the right to visit the children, and the other party has the obligation to assist. The method and time for exercising visitation rights are to be agreed upon by the parties; If the agreement is not reached, the people's court shall make a judgment. Where a parent's visit to a child is detrimental to the child's physical and psychological health, the people's court is to suspend the visit in accordance with law; Visits shall be resumed after the reason for the suspension has disappeared.

First of all, the basis of divorce is that both parties feel uncomfortable together, and they are unwilling to redeem each other, and they will not change anything because they want to save this marriage, so this separation is inevitable.

Secondly, after the divorce, all the problems are solved? The answer is no, no! It's just that I've left the scene, the "battlefield" I used to have, or the situation I didn't feel comfortable in.

Most people's fundamental problems will not be solved by leaving, unless it is a painful experience or a situation where there is no way out, some people may change, and change is the premise of solving the problem.

Thirdly, after the divorce, there will inevitably be two situations, remaining celibate and choosing to remarry. In either case, in terms of probability, there is a 50% chance of being happy or unhappy, so there is no need to dwell on the outcome of these two choices or make any presuppositions in advance, which really doesn't make any sense.

Because of the same choice, others are happy, but you may not; If others are unlucky, you may not be the same. In fact, the real happiness code is in your own hands, and it is determined by whether you have an independent personal will within you, and this independent consciousness includes economic independence, which is the main premise.

So the hard thing is actually the change in psychology and cognition, how to do it? You need to learn, you can read books, you can find friends with a higher cognitive level than you to contact and learn more, and you can also find relevant people to do counseling (not just anyone, you need a teacher with special abilities, such as the other party's perception, empathy, acceptance, tolerance, and compassion, etc., these are the most important, pay attention, there are many people who can speak, but there are very few people who are really capable)...

After learning, it is necessary to have the ability to take action to change, while doing, while introspecting, while trimming, and then doing. It will be a long process, with repetitions in between, but on this path, you will find that the change of self is exciting, and the self-choice is becoming clearer and clearer.

Then, when one day, you are choosing between remaining celibate and choosing to remarry, no matter what choice you make, your subsequent life will inevitably be abundant, and happiness will follow.

1. It will make the child's life have a shadow, and the divorce of the parents will make the child's life have a shadow, and it will make the child wonder why others have parents to accompany but not themselves, which will leave a lot of bad impressions in the child's growth process, which is very unfavorable to the child's future.

2 will make the child insecure should have thrived under the protection of the parents, if the parents divorced, then the day for the child to shelter from the wind and rain will be gone, will be closed to make the child particularly insecure.

First, it won't affect you for the rest of your life.

Divorce may have a certain impact on the future, but divorce will not affect you for a lifetime, especially for those husband and wife The relationship is not good, if the divorce is a relief for both parties, and then the meaningless marriage relationship will basically only affect you for a while.

Second, it has little impact on yourself.

If the husband and wife are not in harmony, then the divorce, in this case the impact on themselves will not be particularly great, the impact is more than the family, the whole family will no longer exist, the relationship between husband and wife does not exist, the family is a broken family, but the impact on themselves is not particularly great.

Third, understand the importance of family affection.

Many friends are divorced, more understand the importance of family affection, for example, in some marital relationships, one party cheats the other, in this case, the people who can help you or do their best to help you are basically parents, such friends after a divorce, they will understand the importance of family affection more.

Fourth, protect yourself.

If you are really divorced, you must learn to protect yourself, otherwise you are very vulnerable, not only psychologically, but also property, so in the process of divorce, you must protect yourself, after all, the current law is not particularly sound, it is impossible to achieve 100% equality, only protect yourself, so as not to let yourself be hurt psychologically and property.

Fifth, there is a certain psychological burden.

Some friends will have a certain psychological burden after divorce, if there are relatives and friends at home who are not very open-minded, especially those who are more conservative in thought, they will point fingers at the matter of marriage, and if the parties are not very strong in their hearts, they will have a certain psychological burden.

Sixth, one's own strength determines the size of the impact.

For some divorced friends, some people have a greater impact, some people have less influence, if their own strength is stronger, then there is basically no impact after divorce, if you get along with others may also harvest a happy marriage. For those who are not too strong themselves, the impact is slightly greater, and later when choosing a spouse, divorced people may not be very popular, and they may also be discriminated against by some people.

Seventh, become less convinced of marriage.

Many divorced friends have this feeling, they will become less convinced of marriage, although they may choose to get married in the future, but when choosing to get married, they will have more considerations than before, there will be more objective judgments in looking at people, and they will be more cautious when they get married again, and they will not enter marriage again without full certainty.

Eighth, be able to understand some things and people better.

If you are divorced, the biggest impact is to be able to understand some things and people better, if there is no divorce, maybe the marriage is still a marriage, but in case you meet someone unladylike in the marriage, encounter such a thing, those who are not very mature will become mature in an instant, and those who are not very good at looking at people seem to suddenly become more able to look at people.