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I really understand this mood, sometimes I can't help but lose my temper with my child, but after losing my temper, I regret it very much, and I feel that it is actually very wrong to do this, and then I feel guilty. In fact, many times when we lose our temper, we will find that the child has not made much of a mistake, and just a little thing will make us emotionally collapse. <>
In fact, many of the problems lie with us as parents, not with our children. We need to understand that children at this stage are actually like this, and they are going to continue to grow in this way. We must adjust our mentality, only by adjusting our mentality, and correctly look at these problems that children will encounter in their growth.
At this time, our mentality will have a big change, and we will be able to deal with the problem calmly when we encounter the problem of the child. <>
When you want to lose your temper with your child, first calm down and control it for 10 seconds, and after 10 seconds, you will find that it is not a big deal, in fact, it is a small thing. For example, when a child wants to buy a toy, if he can't get it, he will cry and make trouble, in fact, this is also a very normal psychological state. Think about it when we didn't get toys when we were young, whether it was the same kind of mentality, and whether we also felt very sad.
Some people may vent this sadness, while some people just bear it silently and dare not express their thoughts. We can squat down and tell the child: knowing that he can't buy this toy, feeling very sad, but it is not right to lose his temper, we should express our thoughts well, communicate with parents to negotiate the problem of buying toys, and then tell the child how to get this toy, such as helping parents do housework to earn pocket money.
Wait a minute. <>
If parents always lose their temper, they will find that their children's emotions are indeed affected by their parents, and children will also like to lose their temper and use tantrums to solve problems. When the parents' emotions are in a very stable state for a period of time, they will find that the children's emotions are also relatively stable.
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Lose your temper with your child often, learn to control your emotions, and in terms of managing your child, you can't be willful and willful, you should communicate more with your child, so that you can become good friends who talk about everything.
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You should adjust your mentality, your mentality is not very good, so you can't educate your children well, and you are impatient with your children.
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If you often lose your temper with your child for no reason, it will affect some of your child's psychological growth, and will make your child feel timid and unconfident, and hope to control your emotions, or find your own problems, and control your emotions.
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Adjust your mental state, don't get angry all the time, don't let yourself care too much about something, keep yourself calm.
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Before giving birth to a baby, every parent has great expectations for the baby, and also vows to be a good-tempered, patient, and reasonable mother. But after the child was born, he challenged the mother's bottom line again and again, so that most mothers began to have a bad temper.
Patience is also a little gone, and sometimes because of the baby's disobedience, yelling and scolding the child. When I calm down, I look back and think that I was so wrong. So what should I do? In fact, smart parents will use the following 3 ways.
Many parents vent their emotions after talking about their children, but they have caused great psychological damage to their children. When parents yell at their children, the children will become very weak, some children will cry, and some children will pout their lips and be unhappy.
When you come back to your senses, even if you are doubly careful to coax the child, the child's psychological trauma has already been caused. The next time you yell, your child will be frightened. Rather than this, it is better to communicate carefully with your child at the beginning.
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Because most of today's children are only children, they are overspoiled by their parents, resulting in a very lack of temperament and character. When a child is angry, parents need to learn to guide their child. Being angry with your child doesn't solve the problem.
1.Lay the groundwork and reduce the chances of roaring.
To reduce the noise, we also need to start by changing the surrounding environment. There are some things that should be done on a regular basis so that the child's bad behavior does not develop into uncontrollable conflict.
2.Talk to your child about their emotions.
You can also talk to your child about how you feel right now in a language that your child can understand and tell them what makes you feel this way. While children should not expect to know themselves every time, the process of chatting is also a release and relief.
3.Let your child have the right to make their own choices.
When a child feels that he is in control of his life, he will cry less to fight us for control, and we will argue less with our child.
4.Show your child that.
When you stop your child's inappropriate behavior, you should crouch down and further demonstrate the right behavior for him. Squatting ensures that the child has eye contact with you, on the one hand, it can attract the child's attention, and on the other hand, you are not prone to tantrums.
5.Lower your expectations.
When the child was born, his parents thought that as long as he grew up safe and healthy, he would be fine. As their children grow, parents unconsciously ask for more. However, we are not ordinary people, so why should we let our children be the best of the best?
Instead of blindly nitpicking, it is better to look at children with admiration, discover their bright spots, develop their strengths and avoid weaknesses, and encourage them to explore the world they are interested in.
6.Use a parent-child journal to control your emotions.
I insisted on using a parent-child diary every day to write down what problems my children encountered today and how I dealt with them. A few days later, when you look through your diary, you will find that you actually lose your temper with your child every day because of some small things. You can really examine the reasons for your tantrums and control yourself in your future education.
1. Children are timid and cowardly, and have no ego.
Children are in a state of tension every day, and it is easy for children to become obedient out of fear, which in turn leads to indecisiveness, weakness, and even self-defeating in the future.
2.Implications for parent-child relationships.
Parents always lose their temper, and the family atmosphere is always full of gunpowder. Children live in such an environment every day, and in addition to being nervous, they will be full of boredom, home, parents. It can seriously affect the parent-child relationship.
As the child gets older, the child becomes more and more rebellious and alienated from his family.
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If you can't help but lose your temper with your child, you must control yourself. If you can't help but lose your temper with your child, it is likely to cause a lot of damage to your child's body and mind.
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Parents should learn to control their emotions by themselves, and the main reason for their children's frequent emotional loss of control is that their children's performance is unsatisfactory and their children's problems have not been solved for a long time, so parents should help their children solve current problems while controlling their emotions. Mild consequences, the child is rebellious, depressed, and suspicious; Moderate consequences, the child is short-tempered as an adult, complains or raises the bar, and is harsh; Severe consequences, severe depression, anxiety disorders, neurological personality.
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That must be choosing to go out for a walk immediately after being forced to get angry by your child, and vent some emotions through exercise, which may cause your child to dislike you.
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Parents will always want to lose their temper with their children in the process of educating their children, and parents want to be able to resist losing their temper with their children. It is important to know that in the process of educating children, parents may always lose their temper with their children for no reason because of their children's mistakes. But as a parent, you must control your emotions so that you can better educate your children.
Parents should know that when their children are young, they are prone to make mistakes, and parents should know how to forgive their children, and at the same time understand what the reasons for their children's mistakes.
In today's life, there are many parents who will find that they always want to lose their temper with their children for no reason in the process of educating their children. Especially after seeing the child's test score come down, you will find that the child's test score has suddenly dropped, which will make parents feel very angry. If you want to criticize your child verbally, you will even tell your child directly that if you don't work hard next time, you won't let your child eat.
If parents want to resist losing their temper with their children, they must first think in their hearts that the children are their own. If parents always deal with their children with negative emotions, when the children grow up, they will also find that the children will always form habits and use the same emotions to deal with parents. Therefore, it is very important for parents to create a good atmosphere for their children, parents should know that in the process of raising children, it is inevitable for children to make mistakes, but parents must know how to understand their children.
If parents can treat their children as friends in the process of getting along with their children, then they will find that the conflicts between children and parents will gradually decrease. This is mainly because parents can think from the child's point of view and understand the child's approach, so as to reduce the tantrum with the child. Especially when faced with the decline of children's test scores, parents need to let their children have a self-awareness and let their children know why their test scores are declining.
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Parents treat their children in the right way of education, adjust their emotional state in time in the process of educating their children, and when they want to lose their temper with their children, they can distract themselves in time, control their temper, and improve their emotional intelligence, so that they can not help but lose their temper with their children.
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Try to control your emotions, don't lose your temper with your child, think more about happy things, think more about the joy, warmth, and touching that your child brings you, smile more at your child, hug him more, and feel his warm little body.
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When you want to lose your temper with your child, parents should take a deep breath first, adjust themselves, calm themselves down, improve their control, and divert their attention.
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1. Before speaking, make it a habit to stop for 3 seconds
Changing the habit of tantrums cannot be completed in a short period of time, it takes a long and painful process, but the growth of children cannot wait, we can give ourselves a commitment, before speaking, pause for 3 seconds, and ask ourselves, do I need to lose my temper? As long as you survive the first 3 seconds of your temper exploding, that anger will be much lowered.
Usually before we speak, as long as we think a little more, our behavior will be much more rational and gentle, which is also very helpful for children's growth.
2. Accept your emotions
Tell yourself that you are not perfect, that you have your own joys and sorrows, and that you can have your own time to vent your anger. For example: going out shopping, reading a book, exercising, etc., as long as it makes you happy, you can try it.
3. Communicate effectively with children
Many times, when we lose our temper, we realize that we are wrong to blame the child, or that the child has his own troubles. So, if the child makes you angry, don't rush to get angry and don't rush to lose your temper. Communicate with your child first, and if your child really does something wrong, it's never too late to criticize him.
4. Talk to others
Everyone will have a time when they are depressed, especially women, who will always be there a few times a month, and they want to get angry inexplicably. Then try to talk to your parents, sisters, or understanding friends, talk to them, talk to them, and talk to them about your troubles. Sometimes, you don't need someone to help you with an idea, and when you're done, you feel relaxed.
5. Take good care of yourself
We adults also have our own needs, don't forget our social, sleep, exercise, nutrition ......Take care of your body and mind. in order to give children a better family environment. So we also have to take care of ourselves, take care of our daily life, and take care of our emotions.
A person who can take good care of himself can take better care of others. Therefore, we need to make sure that we get enough sleep, exercise and eat right, and leave some time for ourselves to invite friends to go shopping, watch a movie, and relax our minds.
1. Count
At the peak of your emotions, you can count 10 numbers in your mind. When we start counting, we are consciously reminding ourselves to be rational and avoid conflicts.
2. Take a deep breath
After restraining the urge to lose your temper a little, we can take a few more deep breaths to relieve our tense nerves, which will gradually calm you down and relax.
3. Drink a glass of water
When we want to argue, scold, or cry when we are sad, we can pour ourselves a glass of warm water, so that we can calm down physiologically first, and give our physiological brain a little time to relax.
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There is no doubt about the role of parents as children's first teachers, and I think parents need to establish their own authority so that their children can face up to their mistakes. At present, many parents spoil their children excessively, which is also the reason why children love to lose their temper. I think parents should be both rigid and soft, and should not tolerate their children's willfulness, after all, it will invisibly let children slowly develop a bad habit. >>>More