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I have never been a person with high emotional intelligence, and I was even a person with low emotional intelligence for a long time in adolescence, and then I inadvertently read a lot of books to know that emotional intelligence is a thing, and I realized many problems before me, and began to slowly adjust myself, for example, there was a classmate in the dormitory who used my shampoo directly in the shower without my consent, and the relationship was not bad in other aspects. But when I explained that I didn't want that classmate to borrow shampoo after being accused by that classmate of being too stingy, and no longer talk to me about how to talk, we will encounter a lot of things that offend people in life, even if we don't offend people, not everyone likes us, and even our unintentional look will cause some people to be disgusted, want to improve emotional intelligence First of all, I think it is to learn to refuse reasonably, to express our displeasure reasonably, it is the right we should have, when these offending behaviors are in our consciousness, When we know what the consequences will be, and are willing to bear the consequences, our emotional intelligence is the best.
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Emotional intelligence refers to a person's ability to deal with emotions, so the full name is emotional intelligence. I think the main thing to improve emotional intelligence is to be able to calm the mind and allow yourself to slow down half a beat, and second, to identify emotions, if you are aware of what your current emotions are, most of them will release half of the bad emotions. And human emotions, negative emotions are several times more than positive emotions.
Eating whole grains, it is inevitable to encounter setbacks and difficulties, there will be emotional loss, depression, sadness, sadness, loss, powerlessness, helplessness, incompetence, sadness, disappointment, heart death, grievances, resentment, guilt, guilt, shame, humiliation and other emotions Fourth, express emotions reasonably, when you can identify those emotions, you must express emotions moderately.
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I think the first thing is to improve self-awareness and self-control, and only by improving self-awareness can we be aware of our emotions in time and manage them appropriately. As we all know, each of us has a time when we can't bear it, there are times when we want to explode our temper, and we have times when we lose patience, so to stop the great harm caused by these emotions in time, we must control ourselves and release our emotions reasonably. The second is to improve your own level of empathy.
The so-called empathy is the ability to empathize. In the process of getting along with others, it is often easier to build harmonious relationships with others by being able to think from the perspective of others. Then, empathy also needs to be practiced, and you can feel how they feel by putting themselves in the other person's shoes and modeling the other person's body language.
And this process requires us to remain calm in order to understand the other party's situation more deeply.
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Emotional intelligence is the ability to deal with interpersonal relationships, and in my opinion, there is a very core key point, which is to consider problems from the perspective of others, and if you do this, emotional intelligence can be said to be relatively high. Simply put, it's the ability to empathize. When dealing with others and doing things, we must learn to put ourselves in the role of the other party, at first think about the reason why he does this, and then gradually be able to anticipate what the other party will do when he has not yet expressed it, and then adjust his behavior to achieve a win-win situation.
The other party will naturally think that you have high emotional intelligence.
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To be honest, my emotional intelligence is not high, and my mentality is a little pessimistic. Now I am on the way to improve my emotional intelligence and slowly adjust my mentality to become better, I think the main thing is to communicate with people more, and when you chat at gatherings and activities, you can always find something to learn from those who are looking for people to like. It's still a cliché to read more good books, there are many vivid characters in the book, which is still helpful for mentality adjustment and emotional intelligence improvement.
Life is not a lack of beauty, but a lack of eyes for discovery. In fact, in life, entertainment, you can learn things everywhere, but you still need to pay more attention to the details around you.
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Learn to be tolerant and forgiving to others. There are always some small frictions and contradictions that cannot be avoided in life. Tolerance requires us to learn to be patient, as the saying goes, "suffering is a blessing", patience is a plaster that is conducive to all suffering, only patience will make a broad heart.
Tolerance regulates the mindset. As the saying goes, "the sea is tolerant of all rivers, and the mountains are high and there is no desire", tolerance can be open-minded, understand and respect others. This is another magic weapon to improve your emotional intelligence and mentality.
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Be firm in your goals and never waver. People with high emotional intelligence will have more perseverance to do one thing, so please improve your perseverance before improving your emotional intelligence, not to give up and not solve problems when encountering problems, but to face difficulties head-on, and find all ways to overcome them, no matter how difficult it is, as long as you do not reach the top of the mountain for a day, you are not allowed to give up for a day.
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I conclude that the way to improve emotional intelligence and regulate your mindset is to be able to recognize and manage your emotions. A person can't even control his own emotions, and how to influence others, as the so-called "knowing oneself and knowing the other side is invincible" to improve their emotional intelligence, first of all, you have to understand yourself, a person can objectively understand yourself, then when your emotions change, the greater your control over yourself. We should be in control of our emotions, not controlled by them.
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Don't be too self-oriented, profit-oriented, suffer a few big losses, have noble people to teach, and so on.
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Hello dear, 1Give enough attention to others: A person with high emotional intelligence will notice other people's body language, dialects, and even subtle twitching of their faces. In this way, they can discover the changes in the mental activities of others, and act according to the emotions of others.
Because they like to observe others, they can understand the uniqueness of each person. 2.Respect others at all times, no matter what the occasion, who you face, you must respect others.
Respecting others is your own cultivation and has nothing to do with others. Learn to respect everyone you meet in life, and you will eventually accumulate a valuable wealth for yourself. 3.
Know yourself, see through your own nature, be an emotionally intelligent person, know that the biggest flaws do not show your weak side, and the biggest strengths can show your strong side. They will give full play to their best strengths to make up for their own shortcomings. 4.
Treat people politely no matter when and where, a person with high emotional intelligence will always put thank you on his lips, no matter how big or small, no matter how busy or small, thank you, thank you is always the first purpose of a person with high sail selling emotional intelligence. Be polite to others, give people an incomparable sense of affinity, let yourself integrate into the group faster, mingle with everyone, and then be able to contact and make more friends and resources5Strong to psychological qualities.
People with high emotional intelligence are calm, calm and organized. They don't like things, they don't feel sorry for themselves, they know that short-term achievements don't mean anything, and long-term struggle is their persistence. No matter what setbacks and difficulties I encounter in life, it will not affect their psychology, and I will not move even if the mountain collapses and the ground cracks.
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In the face of the help of others, a reply with high emotional intelligence to express gratitude can further enhance the relationship between the two parties while expressing their own gratitude. However, the relationship between the two parties is different, and the words should also be different, which is summarized as follows:
1.Stranger relationships
When you meet a stranger on the way, you can express your gratitude sincerely, and you don't need to politely say thank you words such as "I have a chance to eat", which seems a bit false, because we may not see each other again. In addition to thanks, you can also send blessings, such as peace and prosperity, and good luck.
2.Ordinary friend relationships
Say thank you bluntly, and please drink a cup of milk tea, coffee, or eat a meal depending on the size of the matter. Similarly, instead of politely saying "I have a chance to eat" or "I invite you to drink milk tea", you should ask the other person clearly: "What flavor of milk tea do you like to drink?"
I'll point now, a little careful to show my gratitude, please don't shirk. "What time of the week is it convenient for you, I must treat you to a meal to express my gratitude, and please don't refuse. ”
3.Close friendships
Needless to say, close friends can simply say, "Find a time to have a meal together." ”
4.Husband and wife or couple relationship
Between lovers, you can sincerely say "thank you" to each other at the right time. But usually the two help each other, and it should not be said too often. A kiss or a hug is more appropriate to show gratitude.
5.Parent-teacher relationship
Most of the elders don't care much about the words of thanks, but pay more attention to the attitude of the juniors. In the face of the help of the elders, it is enough to say thank you respectfully and bluntly on the spot, but if it is a great help, then you need to bring gifts to visit the door and express your gratitude again on holidays.
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For people with high emotional intelligence, the smaller the agreement, the more important it is. Because if we really keep and carry out the agreement, the other party will be happy to feel "Ah, he remembers, it's not polite". This will make a great impression on others.
Regardless of age, everyone I meet is my teacher, and everyone I meet can teach me. Many people who are younger than themselves and don't seem to be of much help to themselves actually have a lot to learn. If we treat people who deny themselves and people who hate meeting them with the mentality of "they can teach them", we may be able to make our meetings a little more pleasant.
Xiong Ye feels that everyone is a book, we don't have to read it all, but we don't have to avoid reading it, seeing the advantages of others and learning from them is also one of the ways to become a better version of ourselves. If you want to get help from others, learn to give first"First of all, we need to give something to meet the emotional needs of the other person, which is not only the secret of making the other person willing to help us, but also the first step in interacting with others. "When you ask for something, learn to give first.
Doing something that makes the other person happy will basically achieve what you want: "It's good to just say a simple greeting or a smile." "Think about it, who wants to help someone who asks for someone with a bad face.
Such people usually do not have a grateful heart and do not deserve everyone's help. Always be a minute ahead of the meeting, arrive at the meeting place a minute early, and always be aware of this. In Xiong Ye's view, the "minute" can be extended or shortened according to the individual's situation, and you should let yourself sort out your mood in advance and enter a state of preparation.
Whether it's going to work, exercising, or dating, giving yourself an emotional buffer period is not only not rushed, but also a sign of politeness.
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High emotional intelligence can be improved through learning. One of the manifestations of high emotional intelligence is being able to speak. The words made people feel sincere, to the point, and kind. This requires learning the art of speaking.
To make yourself emotionally intelligent, you must not only know the art of speaking, but also have the kindness from the heart, the generosity of tolerance to others, and the ability to respond to changes to solve embarrassment.
The easiest way to become emotionally intelligent is to praise more and find less faulty. See the world with the eyes of beauty and kindness.
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1. When we communicate with others, we often like to express ourselves in our own habitual ways, but ignore the needs of the other party. What does it mean to do what you like? For example, when you are looking for a job, there are many job seekers who say, how much I want this job, how much salary I want, and you keep expressing what you want, but you ignore what the other person wants.
What you should express is what kind of value you can bring to the company and give the other party a reason to choose you. For example, HR asks you, there are many people competing for this position now, why do we choose you? You can do this:
According to my previous work experience, I have done a good job in team management and sales, if I join your company, I can help the company to build a more efficient sales team, and at the same time help the company to develop a larger market, increase sales performance by 1 million per year. Give the other person what they want when chatting, and you'll become a more popular person. 2. When many people express gratitude, they simply say thank you, so that the other party can't feel your gratitude.
It is suggested that you can use the three sayings to express gratitude: say things + say needs + say feelings. The first step is to talk about things and say exactly how the other party has helped you, the more specific the better.
The second step is to say what you need and say which of your needs have been solved by the other party. The third step is to talk about how you feel and how happy you are. For example, when a friend has helped you at work, you can say something like:
Your analysis of the development prospects of the new ** operation position is really unique and valuable. I feel like I need to take on this challenge, and I'm really happy, thank you. Express gratitude in three words, such an expression can definitely make the other party feel your full sincerity.
I hope I help you!
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