Why do Chinese value face so seriously? Not so for foreigners?

Face is to care about what others think of you and not pay attention to your own feelings. I'd rather live a hard life, as long as others evaluate me as good, no matter how hard I work, I'm willing to persevere.

The culture of the Chinese for thousands of years is like this, why, because we are not a migrating nation, basically where a person is born, he will always live in this circle.

Therefore, in a basically fixed circle, word of mouth is very important, if the people around you have a bad evaluation of you, then you have fewer friends and fewer people who are willing to help you. Therefore, we pay attention to what outsiders say about us, not what we feel inside.

Europeans and Americans, unlike Europeans and Americans, have been moving here and there for thousands of years. It sounds good to say that it has been migrating, and it is not good to say that the Europeans and Americans have been plundering everywhere. So very few people will live in one place fixedly. As a result of this culture, Europeans and Americans really don't care so much about the evaluation of the people around them.

They are used to caring about what they feel in their hearts. Therefore, Europeans and Americans are particularly concerned about the pursuit of personal freedom. To put it bluntly, what do the people around you say, most Europeans and Americans don't care so much, today you are my neighbor, tomorrow, next year, maybe the neighbor will change.

In Chinese culture, there is a word called face. Face is an abstract concept, it is not a concrete thing, but it is essentially the recognition of individual morality, ability, and achievement by society.

In life, we can often hear things such as "this thing is done with face" and "that thing makes people lose face", and the meaning of face is far more rich than we imagine.

In business and officialdom, it is necessary to understand the issue of face in order to understand the principle of operation of the Chinese when doing things, which is a set of established rules.

Writer Lin Yutang said: The word face cannot be translated or defined, it is like an honor, and it cannot be bought with money, it is this empty thing, everyone is fighting for it.

Face is seen in the eyes of others, and it is the acceptance and judgment of people who have a relationship with you.

So what does face have to do with it? It is mainly related to two types of things:

One is moral issues, such as fulfilling social obligations; The second is the matter related to face, which is the identity and ability of people in society. In this case, face refers to the achievement of an individual in society and thus the attainment of social status.

People with high social status have a big face and can decide the distribution of resources. But some people will bluff and disguise themselves as people of high social status, such as the owner of a leather bag company, will rent luxurious offices and drive luxury cars to show that they are not bad for money.

The two types of face functions mentioned above are different, moral issues are inherent to a person, but social face can be increased and decreased.

In China's humane society, the impact of face is very large. Face is related to a person's status in his network, whether he can enjoy certain privileges. If a person feels that he has lost face, his self-esteem will be hurt and his emotions will be unbalanced.

When we deal with others, if we can't add face to them, we should also try not to hurt others' face. Some people like to brag in front of everyone and show that they have a big face, and under normal circumstances, everyone will not directly debunk it.

Because the Chinese love face, he is particularly thin-skinned and likes his heart. People abroad don't care about anything and don't understand etiquette.

Because the customs and habits of each place are different, China is so big, the customs of each place are different, and foreigners are the same, and their customs and habits are also different.

Some people care a lot about face, but face is not valuable. The main problem is to live your life well and not care too much about what others think. If a person cares too much about what others think, he will live a very tired life, as long as he feels content.

Answer: Because everyone values face, money, and power are what everyone is pursuing. For example, a wedding can be reflected, the girl to marry, the quality of the banquet and so on can not be too shabby, foreigners do not have this kind of thinking.

It's not because of vanity, and because of my own feelings. If you are shameless, or you are dead-faced. Isn't that face worthless?

In fact, I think not all Chinese are like that, and some people do want face.

Chinese have a very good face, probably because of the influence of ancient customs, and have strong self-esteem and are more competitive. But I think that some things are not just strong, they need ability, they need capital, if they can't, they can admit it frankly, and it's better, so it's good for themselves, and they don't have to pretend to be tired. This is the Chinese tradition, the Chinese are very important to face, these are the gap between Chinese and foreigners, for face, Chinese must be reflected in the open, because Chinese are also afraid that others will look down on themselves, so they must put on their own shelves and show their face.

I think this is a very bad mentality, because a good face will actually cause a lot of pressure on yourself, for example, when you are outside, you don't actually have a lot of money, but you always pretend to be a lot of money for a good face, pretending to be very rich, which is actually very uncomfortable for you, because you don't actually have that much money.

Influenced by Confucianism, Chinese people have many ideas that they don't like to show, they don't show when they're happy, and they don't show when they're angry. This is also a relatively prominent phenomenon in Chinese culture, "good face".

Men have a better face than women, especially when there are many people outside.

Some people try to save face by saying nasty things to hurt the other person when they are angry, and when they calm down and think about their actions and words, they are often annoyed.

For the sake of face, some people obviously don't have so much money, and they still have to spend a lot of money to do things that "want to save face".

Because establishing and maintaining good interpersonal relationships is very important for a person's survival and development, people will pay attention to others' views and feelings about themselves in their interactions, and in order to maintain their "face", they will leave a good impression on others through various methods.

Some people not only obtain, maintain and improve their face through favors and various means of social exchange, but also confirm and consolidate their face through power.

Human affection and face are the core interpersonal norms of the Chinese.

Face is a product of a person's socialization and is an important aspect that distinguishes people from animals.

Whether it is an Oriental or a Westerner, it is a common and natural need to make a good impression on others and "have face" in front of others. The problem is not to be too "good-looking".

Because too "good face" will make one's behavior too dependent on others, lack one's own internal standards, and ultimately be detrimental to personal growth.

They believe that their true self may not be popular with others and the public, and in order to make others have a good impression of themselves and establish good interpersonal relationships, they often hide their true self as if they were wearing a "mask". At the same time, through various methods to elevate oneself, let others feel that they are excellent in general or special aspects, and can also leave a good impression on others.

Therefore, he always has the image of a "good old man" in front of outsiders.

In order to leave a good impression, there is also a kind of person who often adopts self-exposure, accommodation, flattery, favors and other means to do what he likes.

The more you lack something, the more you show it, and only people with low self-esteem will save face in everything.

There is no such absolute, and it is not a major characteristic of the Chinese that they want to die to save face, and we have never had such statistics in Chinese history.

Love face, some people in our country are like this, but not all, and other countries also have people who want to save face.

This is a traditional Chinese custom, everyone is like this, if you can't hang your face, you feel that it is difficult to live, because many people will also talk about others, if you have no face, it will be difficult to live in the crowd.

Not only Chinese value face very seriously, foreign friends are still like this, but relatively thick-skinned.

Because this is something that has been handed down from China for thousands of years, this may also be China's characteristics and China's characteristics.

It's very unpleasant to have no face.

Because Chinese people are usually more righteous, they know acquaintances, they are human society, and in front of acquaintances or relatives and friends, they are willing to show that they are capable, and they are most afraid of being looked down upon. In particular, you have to be strong in self-esteem, so sometimes you will die and lose face, for fear that others will snub you, look down on yourself, reject yourself, and want to elevate yourself.

Hello, thank you for your patience, this is a traditional Chinese virtue, because the words of the Chinese, there is a face, because they think that face is more important than anything, which is left over from ancient times.

The friendship of the gentleman is as light as water, the friendship of the villain is sweet, the gentleman is light and close, and the villain is willing. Since ancient times, there have been many people who love face, but few people can be indifferent and quiet. Not every Chinese is like this, but there are still some people who can be called gentlemen.

And for what happened to you, I sympathize, but this is just the beginning, in the future, the company, the social entertainment is much more annoying than this, much more dangerous, and you can't push it if you want to, of course you can be like Tao Yuanming without bending your waist for five buckets of rice, and then go into hiding, but there are so few people like this, especially modern people. I suggest that you "externalize and internalize". The so-called "externalization" means that our behavior must conform to society, after all, we cannot get out of society and change society, so we can only conform to it, so as to better integrate into society.

And "inward" means that although the outside is compliant, the heart must be persistent, and you can't lose your heart because of the external compliance. The so-called life should be persistent, and life can be at peace with encounters (Yu Dan Zhuangzi's experience), this is the truth.

"Externalization" requires tolerance, generosity, tolerance, and conformity. But this does not mean that the old man is a good person, which requires us to have something to insist on in our hearts, which is "inward". To repay virtue with virtue, what a gentleman does; Virtue complains, and the saints do; complaining with resentment, mediocrity acts; Repay virtue with grievances, and villains do it.

May you think for yourself.

If I just find a chance to talk to her, everyone's personality is different, like this kind of person who doesn't understand others, you have to tell him to learn to put himself in the shoes of others, and you are the same, think more from other people's point of view, you will find more real imagination, like this kind of always holding parties, in fact, the heart is the loneliest.

First of all, I think you should correct your mentality, learn to get along with others, learn to reject others tactfully, and don't make things so stiff, after all, everyone is a classmate. Second, being a man has his own principles, sticking to his own, and I laugh at what others say.

You yourself will say, this is China, a humane society, if we have the opportunity to go to a foreign country, how free it is.

Relationships are extremely complex, and sometimes there will be times when you have to do it, and you set it up in this situation"Socializing"Well, you can't help but socialize, you have to go perfunctory, and if you don't want to go, unless you don't want to live a good life in the group, it's uncomfortable to go, but I tell you, the sequelae of not going are greater, and you will be more uncomfortable in the future, or even be excluded"People on the margins of society"If you don't want to, just lift up your spirit and deal with them!

And remember! Even if you go, don't put on an attitude of not paying, unhappy and uncooperative, it will be worse than not going, and you have to laugh and say something. Remember!

The main thing is that everyone has to be stronger, and if you think about it, who in the world doesn't want to be stronger than each other? This is a natural instinct that any animal has, so if you want to be stronger than others, you must first have the talent to pressure the other party, those who have the ability such as Ma Yun, people are great talents, will people usually give you face? Unless he is idle, but what about the rich second generation, who are idle at home every day and don't know what to do, so they are more concerned about face, and always like to use money to show themselves, but those ordinary people who have no money, looking at these rich people are even more envious and jealous, if they don't care about face, their self-esteem and self-confidence will be severely hit, in fact, there is no need to care about these at all, the main thing is education, if the ideological education can keep up, no one cares about these trivial matters, Overall, it's still because I'm poor and incapable, but I'm also strong, so I'm just concerned about face.

The influence of traditional etiquette As Chinese, we have been taught since childhood that "people have faces, trees have bark". However, when "wanting face" gradually becomes "wanting face", or even "dying to save face and suffer crimes", "face" has become an invisible pressure that many people cannot bear.

The United States is scolding the people, how can he save face? He can't help it.

A country has long been in a position of being admired and worshiped by the Quartet, likes to be praised by others, likes to be worshiped by the other party, and finally the result of excessive self-esteem When getting along with a certain country, as long as you give the other party everything, everything is easy to say.