How to deal with conflicts with the elderly in the issue of raising children?

First, if you don't have bad money, spend money to hire someone to bring it, so that there will be no such conflict. Because, if you pay a nanny to take care of the child, the role of the elderly is to supervise and assist the nanny to take care of the child together, so she has less responsibility and will not conflict with you.

In the process of assisting, she may be more concerned about how the nanny takes care of the children. If the nanny does a good job and is more professional, the old man knows it in his own heart; If the nanny is not very good and not as professional as the old man, the old man will tell you.

2. Respect the elderly. No matter what causes conflict between you and the elderly, respect for the elderly should not be reduced, even if the elderly do not do it right, respect the elderly. After all, the old man could have enjoyed the previous years in peace, and he would have come to help you take care of the children.

Raising children is a worrying job and very tiring. Some girls are obedient and easy to bring, and some boys are not good to bring, and at the end of the day, the old man is really exhausted, and he still has to be considerate of the old man.

Third, the principles that should be adhered to must be adhered to. In the process of raising children, the experience and concept of the elderly will inevitably lag behind, and the principles that parents should adhere to must be adhered to. Our family has done a good job of this.

For example, children are asked not to watch TV during the day, and the elderly are not allowed to watch TV; The elderly were not allowed to be fed, and after many negotiations and communication, the number of times was slowly reduced.

Fourth, manage separately from the elderly, for example, the elderly take care of the children's eating and drinking, and the children's parents manage the children's picture book learning. In this way, it is also good for the growth of children. Because the elderly are more attentive to taking care of their children than young parents, and in terms of picture book culture and education, they may not be able to catch up with young people.

Manage separately and avoid conflicts that should be avoided.

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Because they have to go to work, the children are brought by grandparents during the day. Since the beginning of raising children together, because of the conflict in the concept of raising children, there have been occasional conflicts. If there is any big contradiction, it is actually nothing, but I think they are too doting, treating children like babies, without any moderation.

1. When I was a child, my child was at home and wanted to watch cartoons, and it would take several hours to watch them; Play games, iPad play casually; If you want to eat, you can, potato chips, candied sugar, etc., so now, I am just over three years old, and my eyes are myopia, and my teeth are all cavities.

2. In life, when we are not there, we have always relied on the urine and urine to eat, and we have fed them, and until now, we are basically half-baked gestures. 3. Since I went to kindergarten, I thought I could breathe a sigh of relief, but I didn't expect it to be even more outrageous. Children, it's normal to cry in the first few days of kindergarten, just make a transition.

But the old man in my family can't do it, two weeks, barely go for 2 days; I didn't look at this situation, and then I forcibly sent it for three or four days, the little guy slowly got used to it, and I was secretly happy, but I didn't expect that as soon as my in-laws sent it, it began to mess up again. The next is basically to go intermittently for a few days, rainy days, not to go; It's cold, don't go; Don't want to go, don't go; Anyway, it looks like an average of 2 days a week. At the beginning of this semester, it is a similar situation.

A few days ago, the teacher said on the WeChat group of the class that the child is one year older in the New Year, let the family train more children, don't come to school for breakfast, don't bring snacks, eat and urinate, wear shoes and clothes, etc., without naming, but basically our children are stained and blushing.

Yesterday at dinner, the child refused to eat, I said let him not eat at night don't think about snacks, hungry, mother-in-law can't stand it again, said what if we feed him, what about eating some snacks, the child is so small... No matter what we say, my mother-in-law always said that the child was still young, and if she continued, she began to cry, saying that she would help me take care of the child and how much it was not easy; The father-in-law was more direct, saying that if he didn't think they could bring it well, he wouldn't let them bring it.

I really have the urge to quit my job and take care of my children full-time, but I feel a little impulsive when I think about it, I have to spend my life and repay the monthly mortgage, and my husband must be too stressful alone; But if you let it go, you're afraid of ruining the child. I don't ask children to be good, just like most ordinary people, why is it so difficult.

1.The requirements for the assistance and raising of the next generation are from high to low, including intellectual education, character training, feeding and cleaning, and safety and defense.

What needs to be done is to limit the assistance of the elderly to feeding cleanliness and safety defense. Blurring the lines can lead to endless conflicts between large and small families, and if your partner is more innovative and assertive, it will end in a scuffle.

2.The problem of quarrels between parents should be understood as a peculiar way of dialogue between them. Because of the limited ability to express themselves and emotional intelligence, this is currently the most effective way to resolve conflicts and vent emotions between them.

All you can do is draw the line, such as not allowing quarrels in front of your children and your wife.

The rest of the time, as long as you don't play a false and cautious way, you don't go to the fire, and if you pinch them, you don't know how to communicate normally, but it reduces the catharsis channels. Negative energy will always find an outlet, and in the end, other family members will inevitably suffer.

3.Dislike and broken mouths for juniors is also a way for them to care for their children under the limitations of low expression ability and emotional intelligence. Although it is true to care, the form is not respectful enough, and it is mainly to impose his will and desires.

If it weren't for the relatives and the boss's colleagues, many people would have flipped the table long ago.

A relatively low-cost countermeasure is negative feedback. That is, they do not talk back to their parents and do not give any response. The more times they do, the more they are motivated to communicate, the more they will communicate. It's a painful process, but it's the least costly.

When we want to hand over the child to the elderly, we should tell the old man some requirements for taking the child, so that the problem of the elderly with the child can be corrected.

You can communicate more with the elderly, choose some relevant books, let the elderly study, guide the elderly more, and care more about the elderly, express gratitude to them, so that they have a sense of inner satisfaction, so that you can correct their mistakes.

To communicate with the elderly, you must take care of your children by yourself, you must have principles, have a bottom line, and don't blindly compromise.

When there is no one to bring the child, parents can take the following ways to deal with it properly:

1.Get help from family members: If you have other relatives or elders in your family, try asking for their help or taking time off work to care for the children. You can also consider sending your child to the homes of relatives and friends to take care of them.

2.Seek help from a babysitter or childcare provider: You can find a suitable babysitter or childcare provider to help take care of your child. However, when choosing, you must choose a formal and reliable institution to ensure the safety of your children and the health of your children.

3.Consider your work schedule: Determine clear working hours and work schedules, and tell your family and boss in a timely manner so that they are aware of your situation and can provide support and support.

4.Consider adjusting your work style: If you have no children to take care of, consider adjusting your working hours, location, or flexible working to better balance work and family.

In general, when there is no one to take the child, parents should analyze the situation rationally and actively seek help to ensure the safety and health of the child. At the same time, it is also important to communicate with family members and superiors so that they can understand their situation and give support and help.