I have mental illness ,,, I m a perfectionist, what should I do?

Perfectionism, many people think it is a compliment, but real perfectionism is really harmful!

Perfectionism is usually very perfect for many things, and there is no problem with pursuing perfection, but the problem is that once it is not perfect, it will produce self-blame, guilt, and frustration are the biggest problems.

However, reality is often not perfect, and pretending to be a crippled boy is the norm. If we are more realistic with reality, we will really make ourselves miserable.

Now I often reflect on how I can improve this problem.

Being aware of your own problems is the first step to solving them. Whenever I ask for something that is beyond my ability, I will consciously warn myself not to be too demanding of myself, which will do no harm to the result.

What is more important than the wide hall is to begin to accept yourself and accept some of your imperfections. The most fundamental thing in this kind of acceptance is not to care too much about the eyes of others.

To enrich yourself more, generally the more connotative people are, the less they will force themselves into a corner. They will also be more open-minded in their hearts, and this open-mindedness will not allow them to enter the corner of perfectionism.

I think it's also a kind of immaturity, and when you mature slowly, the symptoms of perfectionism will be reduced!

Perfectionism is a psychological trait that manifests itself in a strong pursuit of perfection and standards, usually self-expectations and desires, and may also include expectations and requirements for others and the environment. Perfectionism can lead to negative emotions such as anxiety, stress, self-criticism, and dissatisfaction, and as a result, there are ways to cope with and alleviate perfectionist tendencies. Here are some ways to deal with perfectionism:

Try to accept imperfections: Perfectionism is an unrealistic expectation, and there are always some imperfections in real life. Try to accept these imperfections and don't always expect perfection from yourself and others.

Set reasonable goals and standards: Set reasonable goals and standards and don't be too yourself and others. When setting goals, you need to consider your actual situation and abilities to ensure that the goals are achievable.

Learn to relax and relieve stress: Perfectionism often leads to anxiety and stress, and learning ways to relax and relieve stress, such as exercise, meditation, breathing exercises, etc., can help alleviate perfectionist tendencies. Develop a positive mindset:

A positive mindset can help us be more optimistic about our own and others' shortcomings and mistakes, and reduce self-criticism and dissatisfaction. Build a support system: Having a support system with family, friends, or professionals to share your feelings and struggles, and get support and encouragement can help us better cope with perfectionist tendencies.

I see that you suspect that you have compulsive behaviors, which manifests as a constant fear that you will not get the results you want, that you think that the root cause is that you attach too much importance to something, that you feel that you have pathological perfectionism, I see that you are very worried about your current situation and that you are desperate to change the status quo, I see that you are distressed because you cannot change your compulsions, and you blame yourself, you have a sense of disgust towards yourself, you have some anxiety, fearful emotions, and I understand your feelings very well. The part I'm happy for you about is that you're able to be reality checked and very self-aware, you know very well what you're doing, and you're aware that you're having unwanted compulsive behavior.

I see that you know that you have a tendency to pursue perfection, and cognitive behavior** believes that people's bad emotional reactions are caused by irrational cognition, which includes absolutist demands and extremely bad cognition. Just as you demand that everything should be the best - you have to find the best doctor to see a doctor, get the most effective and flawless **, and it must be cured, otherwise you will not be able to learn, you will not be able to meet your own high requirements, your life will not be able to proceed, etc., these unreasonable cognitions are in your mind, so that you are always in anxiety and fear, unable to really act. Paiqi.

I suggest that you use self-talk to see your psychological conflicts, write down all your worries, assume that the worst will happen, and then how you will cope with it, write down your coping methods. The reason why you are insecure is because you don't know how to deal with the bad things that may happen, and if you know that you are capable and have the means to deal with it, then your anxiety will be reduced and you will have more confidence to face the rest of your life.

More importantly, you have to take action in reality, and verify in action whether what you are worried about will happen. Real action, which can be done at the same time as your worries, even if it is something simple, can be useful in reducing your stress. You don't need to change a lot, you don't need to force and demand that you must change yourself, and anti-coercion itself is a compulsion.

Accept your own worries, accept your doubts, you just have to be aware of them, you need to be with them, because their appearance is meaningful, and compulsions exist to avoid some kind of pain in your heart.

First of all, I think you should properly relax your rough posture, don't put too much pressure on yourself, although Yan Chunchao said that the pursuit of perfection is very normal, but also to admit that perfect love is very rare.

I think at this time, you need to restrain yourself slowly, don't always be so strict with yourself, especially when you are hungry for others, and you can't use your own standards to measure others' temperament.

You can seek help from a psychiatrist. Psychological problems are caused by having something unpleasant in the past. You can consult a psychologist.

1. Many times, we feel that our perfectionist tendency is a shortcoming, but many times perfectionism is actually a disease that needs to be cured;

2. There is nothing perfect in the world, and perfectionists tend to criticize themselves and others for no reason in order to pursue unattainable results;

3. Internally, it will cause self-pity, low self-esteem, and anxiety, and it will be difficult to cooperate with others externally to promote the success of the team.

4. In the long run, in order to avoid unattainable goals, perfectionists often refuse to start, encounter difficulties, and show fixed thinking, rather than finding a way to solve the problem.

5. Once a task is started, it is easier for the perfectionist to give up halfway, because each step will not reach the perfect goal he imagined, and it will not be long before the entire task will be abandoned.

6. Society also avoids perfectionism in various ways;

7. Taking public security as an example, a police station in charge of two districts, A and B, each assigned 5 policemen, in the past few years, the incidence rate of the two districts is about 5 (in line with the city standard), the new leader took office, is a perfectionist, want to increase the number of police, completely eliminate the crime rate, the result is reduced from 5 to 4, the increase in the number of police has reached twice the original, obviously caused a waste of resources;

8. Therefore, the cost of doing 80% of the work is far lower than the cost of 100%. This is also in line with the 28th law, that is, to complete 80% of the work, pay 20% of the cost, to complete the remaining 20%, the cost is as high as 80%;

9. The perfection of the work and the cost that need to be paid are not linear, the more you want to eliminate the last point of imperfection, the more you have to pay the cost of doubling, so from the perspective of social benefits, perfectionism is also undesirable;

10. If you also have perfectionist tendencies, start your task, and keep hailing to consider the results, remember, completion is more important than perfection.

1. Correctly evaluate your own ability and position yourself reasonably. Affirm your own advantages, admit your shortcomings, correct your mentality, and not be proud or inferior.

2. Calmly face your own success or failure and strengthen your own beliefs. In the face of failure, we must be optimistic, and we cannot give up the pursuit of success because of the test of failure.

3. Setting reasonable short-term and long-term goals and working in a down-to-earth manner can not only enhance self-confidence, but also relieve tension.

4. Cultivate a positive colleague relationship and team spirit, share pressure, and maintain trust in colleagues.

5. Cultivate your own interests and hobbies, balance the relationship between life and work, relax your nervous mood, and improve your creativity and efficiency.