I m always having a hard time controlling my emotions and I m prone to getting angry, what should I

Only when we really understand emotions can we make a difference in emotional management, usually people have little understanding of emotions, and even feel powerless in the face of negative emotions, often led by the nose.

Usually there are only three ways for people to deal with their emotions:

1. Forbearance, hidden in the heart.

2. Hair, vent out.

3. Escape, keep yourself busy and don't think about related things.

In fact, these three ways are ineffective, and it is easy to form post-expensive diseases in the future. "NLP" has a lot of skills in dealing with personal emotions, which can be divided into two kinds, treating the symptoms and treating the root cause, in view of the limitation of space can not be completely given to you, I will give you a framework, if you find it useful, you can find the relevant bookbox or course to study.

Techniques for treating symptoms can be divided into four categories:

1. Elimination. Eliminate the emotions caused by the event, so that you can feel calm when you recall the event. Such techniques include rapid eye movements, removing grief due to the death of a loved one, changing the element of experience, etc., and more complex techniques, such as removing fear, reshaping imprints, or emotional disorders.

2. Fade. Resolve most of your inner emotions and feelings, leaving only your slight feelings, such techniques include on-the-spot processing, gradual withdrawal, physiological balance, mixing, Hellinger method, etc.

3. Application. Almost all negative emotions have their real meaning and value, either giving us strength or guiding us in the direction of action, so, with inner emotions, we can do a lot of things to improve ourselves and win-win.

4. Cooperation. Accept your emotions and do what works best with them. Just like don't drive when you're tired, avoid making important decisions when you're in a bad mood, exercise instead of negotiating when you're angry and stressed, and minimize the things you need to deal with when you're worried and sad!

Techniques for curing the root cause can also be divided into three categories:

1. Change your beliefs, values and rules.

Because the real ** of emotions is a person's beliefs, values and rules, when they change, the same thing appears, the emotional state of the individual will become different, such skills include: changing the frame, belief into the method, value positioning method, etc. If the beliefs involved belong to the level of "identity", then the method of self-integration, the method of accepting oneself, etc., can be very effective.

2. Deal with issues involving the level of one's identity - this can be some limited beliefs about identity, or identity issues related to the family system, which can be dealt with using the concepts and skills of family system arrangement.

3. Improve my thinking and processing ability, this kind of skill is to increase a person's wisdom, and you can't hope to learn one or two **, and the skill can reach a perfect state, and you still need to continue to practice.

If you can make full use of the above skills in everything you do, and manage your emotions from the inside out, I believe that most of the troubles in life will not appear.

First of all, you must be brave and resolute to tear off the label of your own anger. The sun is new every day, tell yourself: so many cells in the body are metabolized so fast, and the next second you are a new self.

Secondly,Turn "outward seeking" to "inward".

We often blame negative situations such as pain, failure, and unhappiness on the influence of external factors, stubbornly believing that it must be someone else's fault, and always hoping to achieve a comfortable state through external changes.

Now it's time to think about whether the world would change if your life or way of thinking had changed. If we always feel that others are easily irritating us, then in essence, we point the finger at the outside world and eliminate our own reasons.

Believe in yourself: I may not be able to change other people's behaviors and attitudes towards me, but I can decide how I react.

Take 5 deep breaths before getting angry each time, and deliberately distract yourself by counting. At the same time, deliberately find out two reasons why "I" shouldn't be angry, and more importantly, be sure to record them.

By comparing your previous behaviors, I believe you will be able to find the nodes of your own improvement, and you can better summarize some of the flashpoints of your easily irritated selfWhen we are aware of things, we will be in moderation.

In addition, scientific meditation practice will also stabilize the mind and help control one's emotional state. If you are interested, you can contact me through my eponymous WeChat *** "94 Tian Ge" to further communicate about the problem of honing your mind and growing your self-awareness.

To tell you a slightly arbitrary conclusion, if you can't control your emotions, then you won't be able to step into the path of excellence, and if you have already embarked on the path of excellence, you will not be able to maintain stability and persistence. What do you think? Did you feel scared when you heard it?

I'm afraid, that's right, let's continue to ** this question.

The ability to control one's own emotions is a manifestation of whether the mind is mature, and the inability to control emotions, or even anger at others because of trivial things, indicates that your mind is not yet mature, and your popularity is not necessarily too good. What do you think? Weak heart? That's right, let's see how to make the heart real.

In general, it is necessary to learn to feel one's own emotions from time to time, consciously observe and control oneself, and reflect and summarize, so that one can slowly develop the ability to control one's own emotions, so that oneself can maintain a peaceful heart, walk steadily and for a long time on the road of excellence, and have better popularity.

Specifically, the next time you want to get angry because of a trivial matter, you should immediately remind yourself, calm down, and count down from 10 to 1, generally count to 1 when the anger in your heart is not so strong, that is to say, you no longer have such a strong desire to criticize others, at this time, you tell yourself that venting your emotions not only hurts the hearts of others, but also hurts your own body, the body is your own, you can't draw it, and you have to apologize to others because of guilt afterwards, and in the end the matter has to be resolved, you can't draw it, well, don't get angry.

What do you think? Isn't it much better?

Emotional control is a continuous work at the beginning, take a small notebook every night to review your situation of the day, and make a record, reflection and summary, slowly, you will find that the world is getting better and better, and the mood is getting better and better.

If you want to be able to control your emotions well, don't be in a hurry and get angry too easily, you must learn how to be patient, how to reasonably release the bad side of your heart, release the anger in your heart, do these things well, control will be much easier, and the mood will be much better.

First, when you are angry, you should give yourself more hints that impulsiveness is the devil. When people are impulsive, they will do something very extreme, and when they return to calm, they will regret that they did not stop themselves from thinking about it. Therefore, when you are in a very bad mood and want to lose your temper, give yourself some hints in time to try to be restrained, and after a while, you will keep that irritable thought away from you.

Second, watch less news TV with negative social energy and more positive news and positive things. If a person is exposed to negative news in society for a long time, let his mind be filled with hatred of reality, he will be easy to get angry, depressed, and let himself go to the end, so he must learn to create a relatively harmonious and quiet environment for himself, there will not only be a dark side in society, nor will there be just a positive side, he is in line with the golden mean, learn to balance this influence, you will be calm and restrain your emotions.

Third, do more things that are conducive to physical and mental relaxation, and learn to relieve your stress and negative emotions at the right time. Use your spare time, or spare time, exercise more, participate in more group activities, so that you can integrate into everyone's circle, slowly, your personality will change, become good at communication, communication is a process of relieving pressure and releasing pressure. Let yourself listen to the soothing **, give yourself a home, travel, and see the mountains and rivers outside, which are all very good ways to relieve your physical and mental stress.

The most important thing is to understand yourself, know what kind of person you are, what to do to change your bad side, increase your good side, and learn to restrain yourself, which is success. The reason why saints are saints is not because they were born to be so great, but because they know how to endure, ordinary people endure for a while, and saints can endure for a lifetime, and this is where the gap lies.

This is also the case when I was in high school, I couldn't control my emotions, I was very easy to get angry, I didn't like to see anything, I was very annoyed every day, and I just didn't want to live anymore, but after a slow conditioning, after more than a month, my heart slowly calmed down, and I could feel the beauty of life, and finally stopped being irritable about everything.

In fact, I think this is just a kind of mental pressure, because I was in a highly tense study atmosphere at that time, so it will cause me to be particularly prone to anger in the heart, after that time I think there are two things that can make my angry heart slowly calm down, and then let's see what three methods I said. <>

The first is to go to the water room immediately, flush the water, flush your head, and force yourself to calm down, because when the state of mind suddenly changes too much, people will fall into thinking, I was often like this at that time, once I got angry, I immediately ran to the water room to flush my head, so that I could calm down, if I still can't calm down, I will pump my mouth, calm down, I must calm down, so every time I suddenly calm down when I am angry, I will not be angry.

The second is to think about the things that have made me particularly happy when I am angry, when I am doing problems in class, once I can't do them, I am particularly prone to anger, so I always stop for a while when I can't do the questions, think about the happy and interesting things I have experienced, and then do the questions, so that I will not be angry, it is difficult to control my emotions, it does not mean that you can't control it, it's just that you haven't found the right way to belong to yourself.

Nowadays, everyone's temper is getting bigger and bigger, everyone has their own thoughts, and everyone's thoughts are different, so sometimes people lose their temper is not their own thoughts, and many of them can't control their emotions. Next, let me tell you what to do if you have a hard time controlling your emotions and are prone to anger.

1. Emotional transfer method. When you can't control your emotions, you can go for a walk outside, run and walk on the playground, see different scenes and different people in different environments, your heart is very likely to calm down, and then look at the beautiful flowers and plants, you will forget that you have been angry before, and you will have peace of mind.

Two: venting. If you have an angry temper, it must not be difficult to hold back, holding it will make people's physical health problems, and the older you get, the more you will feel, so venting is the best way.

1.Pillows can be dropped. The pillow will never break, you can drop it as much as you want, as much as you want, until you have vented your inner rage.

2.Go to an open place or on the playground and shout loudly, vent your inner anger beyond the sky, the sky will only listen to you silently, will not laugh at you, will not sarcastically, will not look down on you. 3.

Find your partner or best friend, confide in them the reason for your anger like them, they can be regarded as the closest people except your family and you, they will not laugh at you, and will comfort you and give you encouragement, let you stand up step by step, please worry, please be angry.

Three: Crying method. Cry whenever you are angry, cry as loud as you can, and cry out of your anger and cry everything, crying is also one of the best ways to "heal".

I believe that the above three methods can help you when you can't control your emotional outbursts, I hope your temper will get better and better, I hope you can be happy every day, happy is a day and unhappy is also a day, why not be happy every day.

The formation of everyone's personality is related to the experience from childhood to adulthood, it may be that your parents are more short-tempered, so that you have been exposed to it since you were a child, so you also become irritable, but you don't need to worry too much, this status quo can be changed, and being too aggressive can also cause irritability.

I used to be a very angry person, for example, what did I ask my brother to do, and before I could move him twice, I started to rage, shouting, using all kinds of words and even threatening actions. But I'm much better now. The main thing is to consciously change yourself, if you are afraid that you will not be able to notice, you can also let your friends supervise you.

For example, I didn't think I was particularly angry at all, because before I went to college, people around me just told me that I was very straightforward, and now that I think about it, people on our side have similar personalities, so even if I was a little more aggressive than them, they could still tolerate it. But after I went to college, my roommates were all from different provinces and their family backgrounds were also different, so they thought that my loud voice and impatience when I said a few words (in fact, I was just more excited) made them unbearable. <>

At first, I thought it was really difficult to deal with interpersonal relationships in college, but when we talked to each other, they raised their grievances about me and promised to help me change. After that, every time I spoke a little louder, they would remind me, and I humbly accepted it, and now they don't say that, I speak loudly and grumpy.

Therefore, it is difficult to control but also consciously control, every time you self-talk, and let the people around you help you change together, and when they ask you to do so, you can't be radical to object, but should accept it with an open mind, and slowly you will change, everything is gradual, don't be in a hurry.