Why can t I be truly close to people deep down?

First of all, you may not be confident. You have seen such an example in real life, that is, your friends get along very well with each other, but you do not enter the hearts of friends, you may be very envious, but you dare not really get close to others, because you are afraid that you will not be able to take on the responsibility of being a good friend, you may be worried that you are not so popular, you may also be worried that your friends are just friends of wine and meat, and people cannot regard you as real friends, so this relationship is only on the surface and not deep in the heart.

In the face of such dispensable feelings, then you would rather choose not to, in fact, the root of the problem is that you are not confident, you do not believe that you have a charismatic personality, and you will be afraid that you will face disappointment. <>

The second reason is that you are insecure. You will be afraid that others will hurt you. You may feel that having a deep relationship with someone means exposing yourself more and more, and that people will get to know you better and know everything about you, and you may feel that you are in a more dangerous state.

If you don't trust your friends, it's harder to get into people's hearts.

Third, your personality may be more introverted, you want to have your own circle of friends, your own connections, like other cheerful people, but you never dare to take the first step, because you are not good at speaking at the first time. I don't want to take the initiative to get close to others, but deep down you want it. It's just that I don't dare to take the first step in action.

I think the three main reasons are these. You can understand yourself clearly and boldly according to your actual situation, don't feel embarrassed, if you can't even face yourself, then what do you use to face life?

Probably many people have this problem, but I've been in a similar situation before. said that he had a good relationship with whom, but in fact, he was just talking to other people, feeling that no one would understand, feeling very lonely, and not wanting to tell others what he was thinking. Seeing your question reminded me of the past, and here are the reasons I can think of.

On the one hand, it may be that you have been hurt by others before, or have been misunderstood by others, and you are afraid of being hurt by others again, so you simply don't get close. When I was in junior high school, I was wronged by my good friend, and the matter was complicated, so I won't go into details, I will only give you a general idea. I didn't notice when I was wronged by them, and then they asked me if I had that kind of selfish thoughts, and I said how could it be, and I didn't say much, I felt very wronged at the time, and since then I have become more and more reluctant to make friends with others.

Of course, this is my past, and now I want to give you some advice, you must make it clear to your friends about everything, otherwise it will only get worse and worse in your heart.

On the other hand, it's your character. My personality is like this, I try to solve anything by myself, and I don't tell others anything sad, because I feel that it is useless to tell others. I am also afraid that some things will be treated differently by others after I tell others, and I can't stand the strange eyes of others, so I try to keep a normal distance from others, just like putting a mask on myself, and sometimes I don't dare to show my true "face", and I don't dare to say heart-wrenching words to others, for fear that others will treat me differently in the future.

That's why you can't be really close to people deep down.

I hope you can find a solution to the problem based on me!

I'm Winnie, a public welfare consultant at Tianyin, and I hope the following reply can help you.

I always feel very lonely and always have a sense of distance from others =" People are seeking advantages and avoiding harm, this reaction of wanting to escape actually means that you are injured, you may be aware of what is going on, but you may not be aware of the memory that is too painful, the subconscious will be suppressed and buried, but that emotion will still emerge, and the behavior pattern has changed.

Deep in my heart, I want to establish an intimate relationship with others, but I always can't fit in, especially hope to establish a harmonious, friendly and intimate relationship like others="This is a beautiful yearning in my heart, everyone wants to be loved and affirmed, and there is a harmonious intimate relationship, which shows that even if you experience pain, but your heart is still positive, there are pursuits, there are dreams, this expectation and yearning is like a light in the night, and will eventually guide you to the other side of your dreams!

What to do and why are you in this situation=" I believe that you are very painful and anxious in your heart right now, and you may be repeatedly blaming yourself for why you can't be like others. If life is a cultivation and everyone has their own problems, please accept your inner turmoil and anxiety, feel and encourage yourself, as long as I can change the world, it will also change.

This may have something to do with his experience when he was a child, with the people around him, with his personality, and with his way of life! A person who is very timid and very afraid of interacting with people is difficult to make friends, just imagine, a person is often made fun of, his self-esteem must be greatly hit, he will be very unconfident, it is difficult for people without self-confidence to succeed, friends are mutual, you help me, at the same time I owe you a favor, if there is nothing to exchange, once or twice can, for a long time, you must have no friends to do, a confident person, is very attractive, you must not be confident, must not be charismatic enough, I often hear that someone is being used by someone, and he is a good friend, and he is very sad, but he should actually be happy, because you have the capital to let him use it, and you still have a reason to live in this world, I am not good at interacting with people, and I have few friends, but by course? It's not that I don't pay attention to it, but I don't let others take advantage of it, although I'm a good person, others say so, too, there are really not many friends like this, and the women who talk about love bad men, do you have to make bad friends when you make friends?