What do you ask? There s a joke to tell!

Is it 110? ”

No, old man. It's 119".

Oh, I'm looking for a fire alarm....”

The fire alarm is right to find us, old man, what happened? ”

My old man doesn't know where the anger comes from, and he is crazy, and I can't cure him! ”

This....In this case, you should look for 110."

He lit the quilt...”

Listen! I'm going to chase you! I'll decide you! That's what I've been looking for! I will definitely take advantage of this opportunity! I'll chase you until I get there! Dead flies! I'll shoot you to death!

Millionaires and beggars.

When the millionaire drove through a village in a luxurious stretched "Lincoln" car, he saw two beggars pulling grass on the side of the road to eat, and the millionaire immediately stopped the car.

Why do you eat grass? ”

We just don't have the money. A beggar replied.

Really, get in the car and go to my house. ”

I also have a wife and two children at home. A beggar muttered.

Call them in! The rich man pointed to another beggar. "And you, call your family members as well. ”

My family has a large population, and in addition to my wife, I have five children. Another beggar said.

It's okay, it's all called, go quickly! ”

In this way, the two beggars and their families got into the car, fortunately, it was a lengthened car. On the way to exercise, one.

The beggar's wife said gratefully: "Boss, you are so good, you can invite a poor person like us to your home."

The millionaire replied: "It's nothing, I just came back from abroad, the house has been unattended, the lawn in the yard may be more than a meter high, you can eat enough!" ”

A little pig ran in the yard of the police station, and ate the vegetables planted by the police, and the director asked the little pig to be caught and locked up first, and then to find the owner of the pig, and the vegetables eaten were compensated, but they were not found for two days. The director was afraid that the piglet would starve to death, and the owner couldn't say anything about it, so he let it be fed.

More than half a year has passed, and it seems that it is the end of the year, and the pig has grown more than 200 pounds and no one has come to claim it. As soon as the pig was killed and was about to divide the meat, an old man next to the police station came to the yard and said to the director"You see my pig made a mistake, you caught it, you closed it, you sentenced it, and you executed it, and you have to let me collect the whole body, right? "

Ha, haha, ha, ha, haha, ha, hahaha, haha

Ford was once again kicked out of the house by his wife and had to come to a friend's house.

"My wife was very unhappy with my smoking, and I decided to quit many times, but it didn't work," Ford said. Ford muttered as he pulled out another cigarette and smoked it, then asked sincerely, "Friend, how can I quit smoking?" ”

After hearing this, my friend said, "My wife has a very simple method, when I take out a cigarette and want to smoke, she lights the end of the cigarette, and I quit." ”