What should I do if I don t get along with my colleagues? I don t have the ability, and my colleague

I understand your situation, the better family conditions may be their congenital conditions, but this does not mean anything! As long as you are a hard-working person, there will naturally be people who are attracted to you and have confidence in yourself. Personality can be changed slowly, only you adapt to the environment, no environment adapts to you.

Why do you have low self-esteem? There is no need, there is money, this money is not earned by them, and their quality is not necessarily high.

I understand your feelings, you have to talk to them more, be cheerful, and tell jokes with them.

Maybe your colleagues didn't even think about classifying you.

Maybe you didn't put yourself in the right position in the first place.

People know it, understand?

Relax when you come into contact with them, don't see yourself as isolated, and you'll get better slowly.

Don't compare some objective things with others, such as the clothes you wear, the mobile phone you use, etc.

To be honest, in your environment, it's hard to get along with them, unless you have some special skills, such as humor and pretending to be stupid but I believe this is a kind of exercise for you, and it will be good for you in the future. Adjust your mindset, you can talk to old friends, you can think about other things or do other things.

I wish you a happy and happy life.

Try not to compare yourself to them, let everything go naturally, and don't bother yourself too much!

Adjust your own work mindset and friendship mindset in moderation

Sometimes you need to be proactive. If you really can't get along, you can chat online, and if you can't stand it, you can only change jobs.

If you feel that you are not capable, and now your colleagues are not willing to join you, I think this should not be a problem of your own inability, but your own socialization, including your own character, your ability to work is not good, but this does not cover your ability to get along with colleagues in the company, including your own personnel, etc., without ability, you can improve your ability by learning, don't say that you are not capable, and you are very lazy, so that no one can help you, colleagues are not willing to be with you, it's definitely not because you're incapable, it's definitely because there's something wrong with your own character.

Because of the lack of ability in the workplace, colleagues are reluctant to work with themselves, so there is only one solution, that is, to use their spare time to study hard and improve their work ability. Secondly, you should also try to improve your interpersonal relationships, invite colleagues to dinner, or ask them questions.

In the process of interpersonal communication, we must be sincere and grateful; Knowing how to measure and advance and retreat is the real wisdom of life.

Social interaction is essential in our lives, especially in the workplace, and it is inevitable to deal with leaders and colleagues.

But in the face of different people and different social scenes, if you are not good at interpersonal communication and handling interpersonal relationships, how to build a good interpersonal relationship is undoubtedly a headache for you.

For example, Xiao Chen, a 27-year-old man who works in a third-tier city in northern China, wakes up early every day to catch the bus because the company is far away from his home and takes the bus.

Once, when he was waiting for the bus, an old comrade in his department saw him and took the initiative to stop the bus and take him.

When communicating on the bus, the old colleague knew that Xiao Chen lived near the bus station, and felt that it was very troublesome to go to the company to take the bus here, so he took the initiative to say that he could take his car to and from work in the future.

Xiao Chen felt embarrassed, it was too troublesome for him, and he refused again and again, but he was very grateful to be able to take him today.

Unexpectedly, this old comrade was already waiting for him at the door when he got off work, and Xiao Chen couldn't refuse and took him home.

The old comrade told him not to break the bank, Xiao Chen said that it was already very troublesome to be able to take a ride, and if he didn't even express his gratitude, he would be even more embarrassed to take a ride.

1. Sincerity and gratitude.

In the process of interpersonal communication, the most important point: sincerity.

There is no road to sincerity, sincerity itself is the path. When you give your sincerity to others, others will definitely feel it and treat you with sincerity.

Just like the old comrades in the case who gave their sincerity to the young people, can Xiao Chen not be sincere?

At the same time, Xiao Chen also knows how to be grateful, and for the help of the old comrades, he reciprocated by preparing breakfast for them to express his gratitude.

After all, "courtesy and exchange" is the most basic rule of interpersonal communication. Don't be a person who only knows how to take and don't know how to reciprocate, because this is breaking the balance of interpersonal relationships.

2. Don't rush to speak.

In fact, in the workplace, in the process of dealing with leaders and colleagues, one of the mistakes that many people will make is that they are too eager to speak, and they do not wait for others to say me, so that it is not only impolite, but also easy to make wrong judgments.

When communicating with leaders and colleagues at work, the first thing to do is to listen more and talk less, and let the other party express as much as possible.

Wait until you have enough information to respond and interact.

The advantages of this are, first, that it allows you to have enough time to think and think more perfectly.

3. Do not retransmit negative energy at will.

There will always be times when people are not in a happy mood, you can find someone to talk to, but don't complain about your misfortune when you meet someone.

Don't be a walking trash, grab a person just as your trash can.

For anyone who is full of negative energy, anyone who believes in strange powers, no matter how high or low the status is, many people will get bored and will stay away silently.

At the same time, the leader will dislike the person who spreads negative energy at will, after all, no leader wants to see that his subordinate is a complaining person, and too much negative energy will affect the stability of the team as a whole.

If you don't have the ability, your colleagues are reluctant to be with you, which means that you are colleagues, and there is less communication, let alone the relationship between you, so the first thing is to communicate well with them and let them understand you more deeply, only in this way, they will also help you.

Then improve your abilities. If the education is low, improve the education, ask the old staff for advice if you have less experience, don't be afraid of embarrassment, the art is not pressing, you should learn more and ask more, learn that the hand is your own, as long as you have the ability, you will be in demand everywhere.

Then it is necessary to have a good relationship with colleagues, improve their emotional intelligence, multiple friends and multiple roads, don't be stingy, should give gifts, should treat guests, as the saying goes, take people short, eat people softly, when you have something to ask for people, friends and colleagues will help you, will not sit idly by, slowly you will integrate into everyone, over time your ability will also improve, everyone will be willing to work with you. Don't be anxious, it'll be fine.

No one will reject the people around them for no reason, first check yourself to see if you are not good enough, or others misunderstand you, especially the relationship between colleagues is more reluctant to become a contradictory.

It is true that communicative skills vary from person to person, but they are not good or bad. Some people seem to have a lot of friends, very lively, and very beautiful, but in fact, they are all because of interests, and they are not sincere. You don't need others to like you and recognize you, but you have to look up to yourself, and the establishment of this kind of self-confidence does not lie in what others say, but in your own realm and ability.

So, instead of worrying about how to please others all day long, it is better to calm down and think about your future, find your direction, work hard to enrich yourself, improve yourself, and naturally friends will appear.

This is your personal feeling, it is your introversion that causes you to have an inferiority complex, in fact, you think too much, you don't need to care about these things at all.

Work seriously and be a low-key person.

When it's time to speak, express yourself fully. When you shouldn't speak, don't say a word.

Be eager to help when someone needs help. After a long time, the relationship eased.

It should be your lack of knowledge of the job. You haven't fully mastered the work you've done. Why do you want others to cooperate with your work?

Is your work attitude correct? Are you a leader? You have to respect others first.

Only then will others respect you, and what you do is right and reasonable, and others will cooperate with you.

You can improve your professional knowledge and skills through learning, or you can help you find your own advantages through seniors in the workplace or professional career planning agencies, and learn and improve in your own areas of strength, and the achievement effect will be more obvious. Hope it helps.

There is such a saying in the workplace: "When you are faced with people and things that you don't like, the first thing you should consider is how to change the status quo, if you can't change, you must learn to adapt, and if you can't adapt, choose to leave", this sentence applies to most workplace problems.

Since we are colleagues, the relationship is all maintained by the company and work, and the content of the intersection between colleagues is related to work, since they do not get along in character or do not like each other, there is no need to have deep or in-depth contacts with them, and directly limit the relationship between you to the relationship between colleagues, and the contact between each other is limited to work, except for work, there is no intersection with each other, so that there will be a lot less contradictions.

If there is an overlap in your work and you often need to work together, you don't need to worry too much about it, you can try to repair this relationship and test what the other person thinks through your own initiative. If you don't get along with the other person and the other co-workers are able to live peacefully with him, then the problem is you. But if other colleagues are also at odds with him, then the problem lies with him, and even if you try to take the initiative to repair the relationship, it will not necessarily succeed.

However, many things cannot be speculated with common sense, there is a type of person in the workplace who eats soft and does not eat hard, if you can put down your body and try to repair the relationship, it is also possible for you to be reconciled as before.

But what I'm afraid of is that I have an identity, I don't want to make changes for myself, I want to improve the relationship, and even expect the other party to take the initiative to compromise, but this is not realistic at all. Now we want to repair the relationship, not the other party takes the initiative to repair the relationship, if we don't take the initiative to repair it, we can only be content with the status quo, maybe the other party can't stand this kind of work atmosphere, and finally resign. But it's still the opening sentence, try to change as much as possible, everyone is a colleague, although they may not be friends in the future, but there is no deep hatred, in the case of no personal emotion, everyone is just quarreling because of work, if there is no interest involved.

What's not to say?

Therefore, if you can't get along with your colleagues, you can mediate through your boss, because the conflict has already arisen, even if we take the initiative to reconcile, it may not be easy to reconcile, and some things cannot be said. But if there is a boss in the middle, then the matter is well resolved.

If you don't want your boss to know about it, you can also go to a colleague you are more familiar with and make an appointment on the weekend to talk about things outside of work, which can reduce some sense of estrangement, bring each other closer, and then take the initiative to be humble at work, and it is only a matter of time before the relationship is repaired.

But there is one thing you must understand that the relationship between colleagues is different from the relationship between friends, and the reasons for many conflicts are irreconcilable.

Hello dear, good evening, it is normal for teachers and colleagues to not get along at work, after all, everyone's personality is different. It is indeed a difficult thing to get in touch with colleagues, after all, our code of conduct is different, and our three views are also different. In this case, everyone can only take a step back.

You can choose to have more meals with your colleagues, or go shopping with your colleagues. After a long time, the three views and personalities of the two people will run in a little, and they will not be so uncomfortable.

It's really hard for us to make everybody like us, it's really a very difficult thing, if you really feel like you don't get along with your colleagues, then you can only be colleagues, we don't bring feelings into the work, so that we don't feel so bad.

That's all for me. Do you have any more questions? Feel free to consult me and wish you a happy life

In this case, it is necessary to maintain a superficial relationship, in fact, sometimes you just need to hurry up and say hello, and don't talk to him about some of your privacy.

It's okay to get along with your colleagues in a normal way, because the relationship with your colleagues is very ordinary, and you don't need to force it if you don't get along.

At this time, you should greet your colleague politely, and then just don't have too much contact with this colleague. Usually, you only need to talk about some work matters, and don't have any contact in private.

I think it's inappropriate to use resignation as an escape when you encounter annoyance. It's not the best way, but to find your own way to solve the conflict. With these three strategies in mind, your colleagues won't be enemies and your career path will become smoother.

The first strategy: learn to forget.

Most of the conflicts between colleagues are due to some specific things, and even if the matter is successfully resolved, this kind of conflict will often continue in people's minds for a period of time, and may be implicated in dissatisfaction with people because of dissatisfaction with things, and then affect other things. As a matter of fact, the expansion of such contradictions is unreasonable and detrimental to both sides. So, don't dwell on the past and worry about it.

As long as you are generous and don't take what happened in the past too seriously, the other party will often treat you with the same generosity, and the conflict will be resolved.

Taking a step back, even if you are generous, the other party still has a certain prejudice against you, so don't pay too much attention to it. Because the interaction between you and your colleagues is not the kind of friendship and affection between friends, but just a working relationship, it doesn't matter if there are some contradictions and conflicts between each other, as long as it does not affect the work, you don't have to take it to heart. Besides, because the work itself is related to the common interests of both parties, whether it is done well or not will have an impact on each other.

Therefore, if you are generous, even if you can't influence the other party, then, if the other party is a smart person, for his own interests, he will not get into too much trouble with you, at least it will not affect the work.

The second strategy: proactive communication.

After a conflict with a colleague, there is often a period of cold war, at this time, you might as well raise your posture, be positive, take the lead and take the initiative to communicate with each other, and try to solve the problems between you. Among them, you must first put aside the prejudice against your colleagues and maintain a kind and peaceful attitude. When you take the initiative to communicate, colleagues who have conflicts with you may be vigilant and think that you have other plans, which is normal, at this time, do not give up your initiative, as long as you show the sincerity of communication, the average person will not refuse.

If it is a conflict that is difficult to resolve or a relatively large conflict, you should also take the initiative to communicate with your colleagues, review your mistakes, and seek forgiveness from the other party. Don't be like some people, although they also take the initiative to communicate and seek peace, but when they talk, they become forcefully stating their own views and defending themselves.