When there is a conflict between home and school, where should the problem be?

The problem is the gap. What gap? The distance between the expected results and the actual situation.

The smaller the distance, the smaller the problem and the easier it is to solve; On the contrary, the bigger the gap, the bigger the problem, and the more acute the contradictions and conflicts reflected.

Now the contradiction between school and family is more acute, and personally, the problem is the "parent group". The presence of the parents became the place where some of the teachers gave orders, and the family members in the county became the objects of his management. In many cases, teachers can assign tasks to parents of students as long as they go through the parent group.

In addition to the tasks of education and teaching, parents also have to take turns to clean the classrooms in departmental schools. It's all the same work. Why, in addition to the work of a teacher, there are so many "subordinates" who can command.

Parents of students have to juggle a variety of careers? It is in this context that the contradictions between school and family slowly sharpen.

Parents are the places where teachers and parents communicate, which is the original intention of its establishment. However, with the beginning of burden-reducing education, this pressure seems to be gradually shifting to parents. A colleague complained about his child's homework, and the homework assigned by a kindergarten student could not be completed at all.

These colleagues all smiled wryly and wanted to go back to the night shift to do their homework. Because such homework can only be completed by parents. Parents are now the place where teachers assign homework.

In many cases, teachers still criticize parents in groups.

Just like the parents complained about on the Internet, some teachers don't teach seriously in class, and they have to send their children to cram school after class, and they have to do homework modifications, and parents complete them themselves. Parents and teachers are the same, as long as they educate their children, a family can maintain normal operations, so I think most parents are willing to do such things. But the reality is that parents also have work to do, and no matter how late they come home from work, they have to check their children's homework.

It was in this situation that the complaints of parents were aroused, and eventually the conflict between home and school began to slowly sharpen.

There is no timely communication, the educational philosophy is inconsistent, the communication method is problematic, the parents do not pay attention to education, and the teachers are not very responsible.

The problem lies in the fact that parents do not pay attention to their children's education at all, and parents spoil their children, and parents do not have good education methods for their children at all.

The information that appears at home and school is not smooth enough, and there is no starting point, and the problem arises here, which leads to contradictions.

The reason for the conflict between home and school is simply that the parents' expectations are not obtained from the school. This is also what I have personally learned from the observation and personal experience of other people's events.

Recently, I met a colleague dealing with a student incident. The student hit other students many times, and the previous mediation has been resolved, but this time he committed it again, when the head teacher asked for punishment, the parents were anxious, and yelled at the head teacher in the office. The view of the world core is to be tolerant of children, to be tolerant, to be tolerant, that he is still a child, which one will not make mistakes, etc., roughly this meaning.

It sounds very reasonable, but a person is a child, you can't always make mistakes, when you are in school, you expect teachers and classmates to tolerate, but who will always tolerate you when you go out into society. As a parent, you don't always expect someone to tolerate you when you make a mistake, you should try to make it happen again. Of course, you may have the will to make mistakes happen again, but if you can't control the children who are self-defeating, you have to pay attention to ways and methods, and you have to trace the source, because educating children is also a science, so I won't go into detail here.

The parent also spread remarks, meaning that the teacher was irresponsible, etc., which happened to be heard by the parent next to him, and the parent seemed to resonate. After communicating with him, the reason was that because her child could not understand the math class, she asked for the math to make up the class for her, because her teacher understood the child and did not want to find an outside teacher to make up the class, and the math teacher refused because she was busy and had no time, so she thought that the teacher was not responsible. As everyone knows, the teacher is really too busy, and now he is grasping paid tutors, who only care about their own needs and ignore the teacher's situation, and slowly from misunderstanding to misunderstanding, contradictions arise.

It is better to think about what the two sides have done and what they can do to resolve the conflict.

Recently, there have been many contradictions between parents and teachers, and even some parents have specially recorded ** to complain about the teacher's teaching methods, why are there so many contradictions between families and schools now,I think the lack of communication between home and school is a big reason for this. As long as parents do not like the teacher's teaching method, and the teacher does not agree with the way parents educate their children, the chances of conflict become more.

There is a lack of communication between teachers and parents. For parents, they send their children to school in the hope that they can learn better knowledge in school, and hope that teachers can educate their children and become a person of moral education, physical fitness, beauty and labor, but now some parents have expressed strong dissatisfaction with the behavior of teachers leaving homework after school. We can see that although teachers assign homework to children, most of the homework is written by parents rather than children, because now almost every subject teacher will assign homework to children, which will cause a very big burden on children, but they will also be punished for failing to complete homework, so parents have to help their children at this time, which will not only increase the burden on children, but also affect the working hours of parents.

However, some teachers believe that it is within the teacher's responsibility to assign homework to children, or to adopt other teaching methods that they think are more appropriate, and do not need parental interference. After a long period of lack of communication and understanding, the contradiction between parents and teachers is getting deeper and deeper, parents do not obey, and even doubt the teaching level of teachers, and teachers also think that parents' behavior is too blindTherefore, it is difficult to put the matter of home-school cooperation to promote the better and healthy growth of children on the agenda.

Therefore, both parents and teachers should find ways to communicate, for example, teachers can make home visits, or patiently communicate with parents at parent-teacher conferences, confide in them about their work demands and the growth of their children in the class, so that parents know that teachers are patient and responsible in teaching their children. At the same time, teachers should not hide from parents about some things in the school, but should seek truth from facts, tell parents objectively and comprehensively, communicate with parents patiently, and strive to get parents' understanding.

Therefore, as a teacher, you should not only take teaching and educating people as your first priority, but also deal with interpersonal relationships and parents, only in this way can you better teach students.

The communication is not timely, and the understanding of the child is not enough, and there is also a lack of patience. It's just blindly putting the blame on the other party.

The family and the school shirk each other's responsibilities, neither wants to be responsible for the child's grades or character, and is afraid of taking responsibility to reduce their normal work.

In my opinion, most of the problems between home and school are caused by untimely communication, resulting in information asymmetry, parents do not know the situation of students at school, and teachers do not know what situation children are at home, so there will be contradictions and conflicts.

Now the contradiction between school and family is more acute, and in my personal opinion, the problem lies with the "parent group". Because of the emergence of the parent group, this has become a place for some teachers to "give orders", and the family members in the group have become the objects of his management.

In many cases, teachers only need to go through the parent group to assign tasks to the parents of each student. In addition to the tasks of education and teaching, parents also need to take turns to clean the classrooms in departmental schools.

It's also work, why do teachers have so many "subordinates" to command in addition to work. And the parents of students have to wear multiple jobs? It is precisely under such circumstances that the conflict between school and family has slowly become acute.

In my personal opinion, these reasons can be roughly divided into the following two types:

1. The parent group that has changed its flavor As a place for teachers and parents to communicate, this is the original intention of its establishment. However, with the beginning of burden reduction education, it seems that these pressures are gradually transferring to parents.

A colleague once complained about his child's homework, as a kindergarten child, the assigned homework is impossible to complete. These colleagues all smiled bitterly and said that when they went back to work at night, they still needed to do homework, because these homework can only be completed by parents.

And the parent group has now become a place for teachers to assign homework; In many cases, teachers will also criticize parents in the group.

Second, the long-term backlog of grievances of parents is just like the complaints of parents on the Internet, some teachers do not care about teaching in class, let their children go to cram school after class, and the correction of homework also needs to be completed by parents in person.

If parents are just like teachers, they only need to educate their own children to keep a family running, and I think most parents are happy to do such things.

But the reality is that parents also have their own work to do, and no matter how late they work, they still need to check their children's homework when they get home.

It is precisely in this situation that parents complain, and eventually the conflict between home and school slowly becomes acute.

Contradictions are inevitable, but not to communicate is the biggest problem of contradictions, and the conflict between schools and families may lie in the fact that the communication between parents and their children, teachers, and the three is not close and timely.

I think that the morality and professionalism of teachers are not as standardized as before, and the original work and responsibility of teachers have been shirked to parents who are also working hard.

Educating children requires a concerted effort between home and school, and teachers play a vital role in coordinating the relationship between the two. But it's not easy to do this job well. Many teachers shake their heads and sigh when they mention parents, usually expressing their helplessness with an emotional sentence:

Parents nowadays can't communicate with ......On the other hand, parents are also full of helplessness: "The current teacher, don't say it......."It seems that the parents also have grievances that they have to complain about. In home-school communication, we usually encounter the following problems:

First, there is a misunderstanding of home-school communication. Some teachers mistakenly believe that communicating with parents is to tell parents about their children's problems, or to complain to parents when children make mistakes, although this way can arouse parents' attention to children's education, but it is easy to cause parents' disgust, which of course cannot incorporate the power of parents into the joint force of education. However, some parents also do not have a correct understanding of home-school communication, believing that communication is nothing more than asking about their children's physical condition and learning situation, and often do not pay attention to their children's mental health and getting along with peers.

They even think that communication should be a school affair and has nothing to do with parents. School education is the whole of education, and parents do not have to participate, let alone actively participate in education management.

Second, the form of home-school communication is more important than the substance. Parents' interests, needs, motivations and interests vary, and the forms and levels of communication between parents and the school are also different. Parent-school communication is mainly focused on a superficial level of participation, and it is often the school that dominates such activities.

The main forms of participation at this level include parent-teacher conferences, open days, student exhibitions, parent contact books, parent reports, etc.

Third, one-way indoctrination replaces two-way communication. In terms of home-school communication, many schools still focus on one-way indoctrination and lack two-way communication. Parent-teacher meetings, contact and appointments with parents are the most common ways for teachers to communicate and cooperate with parents, and in these communication methods, the school only blindly instills parents and rarely listens to parents' opinions or suggestions, so that parents' participation in school education is still at a relatively superficial level.

Fourth, arbitrariness is greater than pertinence. Most schools only hold one or two parent-teacher conferences at the beginning of the semester or at the end of the semester as a class, and most of them are held at the same time for all parents. The rest of the time is to solve the child's problems and communicate with individual parents, which is more casual.

This kind of activity lacks planning and systematization, and parents cannot learn more systematic and stable family education concepts, knowledge and methods from the activities, and it is difficult to form a time and effect reinforcement. Even if parents are given family education knowledge, what parents have obtained is only some simple skills and fragmentary knowledge, and cannot fundamentally form a relatively complete set of family education concepts and methods. Lack of pertinence to meet the individual needs of parents.