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The original family has a great influence on the children, basically shaping the character of a person's life, and the positive and negative influences are also very obvious, the children of the harmonious family will be very conservative in their character, and some families such as divorce and quarrel and domestic violence will have a very unconservative impact on the children's character, and there are all kinds of things.
Of course, this is not always the case, many people's three views will be more natural and correct, even if they are influenced by their parents when they are young, but they will know what is right and make some corresponding adjustments the day after tomorrow.
In fact, it is difficult to change the immature mind, because it is difficult for immature people to notice, and it is also difficult for them to change.
First of all, you must be with people who are more mature in mind, emotional intelligence, and IQ, they will accept an immature person, and learn from them at the same time, see how they behave in the world, and see how they are mature in the end, which is a behavioral thing, and they can learn what they do.
And the most important thing is the way of thinking, or to solve their own mental problems, this still depends on the personal way of thinking, some people may be like this for a lifetime, they will not want to change at all, even if others want to help change will not be changed, such people will naturally not ask such questions, but if they ask such a question, they should try to change their way of thinking, such as reading.
Then go to the original family to find some solutions, let the parents apologize to me, and let them give you some comfort, and will make some changes to some of my concepts.
Of course, mental immaturity can slowly change over time, and people will definitely grow in their lives, experience a lot, and naturally grow a lot.
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Since you yourself say that you are mentally immature, it means that you are also aware of your own problems, and it is because of the divorce of your parents that you have such problems, then you should enrich your own experience, this kind of thing is generally not urgent, and it is not possible to mature mentally in a short period of time, unless you have experienced a setback that hits you hard, and then you mature.
In fact, the divorce of parents is indeed a big blow for a child, and it may be ridiculed by the friends around him, and then cause depression and become a shadow in childhood life, and there will be the problem you said, immaturity. However, there are their own reasons for their parents to divorce, isn't it true that two inappropriate people have been living together inappropriately, and watching their parents quarrel all the time, they will be happy? Although divorce will be a blow to the children, there are also good things, and family conflicts will not develop further.
If you want to make yourself mentally mature, you have to look at these things, the first thing you have to see is the divorce of your parents, and then you have to read more books (you can also read other people's comments on this book after reading it), watch some news, understand some things, learn to think independently in dealing with people, and learn to empathize. Before that, learn to let go of your immature mind, that is, the idea that you are not "right" now, and slowly get in touch with new thinking.
From now on, say "goodbye" to your immature self in the past, of course, you will encounter many setbacks on this road, and it will not be smooth sailing, but you must know that these setbacks are necessary for your mental maturity.
I hope you can face it bravely, continue to "practice" in life, and finally transform into a new and better self.
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In our lives, there are many parents who are reluctant to divorce for the sake of their children, even if the relationship is broken, and they are afraid that divorce will cause psychological damage to their children. It is true that many children will be mentally immature due to the divorce of their parents in childhood, and I think we can try to change it in the following ways.
1.See a psychiatrist. If you become mentally immature just because your parents divorced in childhood, then there must be a psychological problem and you need to see a psychiatrist.
And explain to the psychiatrist the reason for becoming like that, and the psychologist will enlighten and treat you according to your situation. In fact, the reason why the mind is immature may be because I feel that my parents were very happy together when I was young, but the happy life after my parents divorced is gone, so I refuse to grow up, and I want to stay in the way I was young, so that there will be a happy family. Through the guidance of a psychologist, they can recognize and accept reality.
2.Parents and children communicate with each other. In fact, heart disease still needs heart medicine, and the reason why the mind is immature is mainly due to the divorce of the parents.
Therefore, if you want to open the knot, you still need your parents to solve it. In fact, everyone hopes to have a happy family, and if there is really no affection between the parents, it is understandable that they will get divorced. But parents must communicate well with their children, tell him that you are divorced but you still love him, let him accept this fact, so that it will slowly return to normal, and the heart disease may slowly get better.
3.Have a happy family. Having a happy family is everyone's dream, if your parents really can't give you a happy family, but as long as you live in a happy family, you won't feel bad when you are happy.
In fact, every child's dream is very small, to be able to be with their parents every day, to have a loving home, so it is good, I sincerely hope that all children can grow up healthy and happy.
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Childhood yin parents divorced and led to immaturity, indicating that this matter has a big shadow in your heart, which leads to your immaturity, I think, you may not adapt to it in childhood, and then have not accepted this reality, plus after the divorce of your parents care less about you, and then you will feel unbalanced, especially uncomfortable for a night, but also very difficult to accept this fact, I suggest that you, you should go out for a walk, open your heart to face nature, or you will find a place, Then shout out the words in your heart, which will reduce your stress a lot, your English parents divorced in your childhood, which led to immaturity, this matter will also cause you to become stressed, and then you can't indulge, I feel that this kind of thing will also have a great impact on your later life.
In the future, because of this kind of thing, you will hold everything in your heart, and put more and more pressure on yourself, and then you also feel that there are no good people around you, and then no one will support you to tell you the bitterness in your heart, and then in fact, you are very uncomfortable and panicked, but you have no one to tell, and then you will arm yourself when you live in the future, for example, others seem that you are happy and strong, in fact, you are very sad in your heart, because no one listens to you say that you are bitter in your heart, And then slowly will come to this mental immaturity, I think most of the divorced children will grow up well, have a certain impact on life, it may be that this child is particularly adaptable, and quickly adapt to this matter, this child may not have any impact when he grows up, but for children who are relatively weak in adaptability and have not believed in this fact, they will have a certain impact on life when they grow up.
The parents divorced and caused by immaturity, it means that you have been minding this matter in your heart, and you have not been able to accept it, I think you should go out to relax, pour the bitter water in your heart, I feel that this will help you more, don't hide the pressure in the future, learn to tell, life is very stressful, plus your parents divorced, these pressures are pressed on you, you will be more and more unable to accept. <>
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This is a difficult question. Reason 1: What is maturity? What is immaturity? Do you have a scientific standard? Even if we do, our standards are often different from yours. In this way, it is very difficult for us to ** on this issue.
Reason 2: Even if the standards are unified, it is okay, but will the divorce of parents directly lead to their mental immaturity? So far, no one has come to such a conclusion.
In reality, there are those who have psychological problems due to their parents' divorce, and there are those who grow up and mature quickly after their parents divorce. The divorce of parents is only an external factor, and the real psychological maturity still depends on the internal factor - it depends on one's own psychological adjustment ability and anti-frustration ability. Balzac said
Suffering is a whetstone for the strong, and an abyss for the weak. That's what I'm talking about.
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The childhood family environment has an important impact on an individual's mental development and maturity, but even if you experience a bad family environment, you still have the opportunity to change and improve your mental maturity. Here are some suggestions that may help make a difference:
Seek psychological support: Counselling with a psychological professional, such as a psychologist or counselor, can help you understand and deal with the impact of past family experiences on your mental development. Through conversations with professionals, you can explore your own emotional and psychological state and learn ways to cope and solve problems.
Learn emotion regulation and coping skills: By learning emotion regulation and coping skills, you can enhance your emotional management skills and improve emotional stability and self-control. This can be done by attending psychoeducational classes, reading books, or seeking professional guidance.
Build a healthy support network: Build close relationships with people who understand and support you, including relatives, friends, partners, friends, or support groups. These people can provide you with emotional support, advice, and encouragement to help you better cope with and overcome past difficulties.
Develop self-awareness and self-growth: Through reflection and self-observation, understand your own thinking, emotion, and behavior patterns, and seek pathways for personal growth and change. This may include reading books on psychology or personal development, taking training sessions, or practicing techniques such as meditation and mindfulness.
Accept the past and let go: Although past family experiences may have an impact on you, it's important to learn to accept the past and look forward. Let go of the pain and grievances of the past and focus on your own growth and future development.
Keep in mind that the mental maturation of an individual is a long-term process that requires time, effort, and patience. By actively pursuing personal growth and self-care, you can gradually change and develop a more mature and healthy mental model. If you feel like you can't cope on your own or need more in-depth guidance, it's a wise idea to seek professional mental health support as a first step.
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From a certain point of view, we can never really look at overcoming the childhood experience, which is the foundation on which every personality is built, and that experience makes you who you are and I who I am. But as you have discovered, when we learn to understand the reasons for our actions, we gain a new grasp of our emotions and can stop hurting ourselves. For example, reactions and mindsets based on early experiences have not disappeared whenever there is a need.
However, with this understanding, you can prevent it from becoming a distraction in your relationships with others. In the eyes of the counselor, there is an interesting discovery. Many visitors complain that they are normal in front of strangers, but they always have a bad relationship with their loved ones.
Because in intimate relationships we are more real, less pretended, and more like children. Your emotions are actually a kind of signal that something is wrong in the depths of your soul. These emotions and problems may be deliberately suppressed in daily life, and only in a relaxed state will they be involuntarily expressed.
Most of these deep-seated emotional problems are rooted in some traumatic experiences in childhood. As the landlord realized at the beginning, the lack of love in childhood caused the lack of confidence and loneliness.
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Although we are also mired in the quagmire, I would like to give the subject the following advice: That is: Songcha opens his heart and tries bravely.
Never be afraid before the problem comes out, and don't stop loving for fear of being hurt. There may be other families that are better than us, but there are also terrible moral kidnappings and all kinds of problems in many families. There is a saying, don't envy the good life of others, all living beings are suffering, and everyone is struggling in different quagmires.
Try to give wild hue skin, tell your lover what you really think, and only by trying again and again will you find someone who can make you open up, say all your scars, and make you as comfortable as basking in the sun in winter. God has given us bad memories and let us know more precious souls. God doesn't love us, but we need to love ourselves.
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It's not that I have psychological problems, but I can't adapt to the new environment yet, and I have a sense of fear of the new environment. Many people will be like this, which can be regarded as a sign of not very good psychological quality.
Specifically, to improve psychological quality, we should start from seven aspects: including self-awareness training, intellectual training, emotional regulation, will training, personality shaping, study guidance and communication guidance. The key is first and foremost to improve self-confidence, method:
1) Self-affirmation. People must constantly deny and affirm themselves in order to progress, and the ultimate purpose of negation is to develop in the direction of affirmation, self-affirmation, and maintaining firm beliefs are often the key to career success. (2) Abandon low self-esteem.
Low self-esteem requires three conditions: first, a lack of successful experience; second, the lack of objective and fair assessment; Third, the self-assessment is biased. To abandon low self-esteem, we must first overcome ourselves, set a goal for ourselves, have strong beliefs, believe in our own abilities, and at the same time have a scientific and reasonable assessment of ourselves.
3) Enhance self-confidence. (4) Psychological regulation and emotional regulation.
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The future life is you and him, if you are with someone you don't love, you may suffer for a lifetime, not only hurting you but also hurting your boyfriend who has been with you for five years, after all, it is difficult to find someone who loves each other; You might as well say to your mother that if you love me and love me, don't persuade me. I already have someone to love; If I had to, I would not be happy, and I would have been miserable for the rest of my life; Although this may hurt the family, it is important to let your parents know that you have grown up and have their own right to decide what is right; You may be able to find someone who is closer to your father to help you, and explain your situation to him, and I think he will help you;
This situation can only show sympathy, your grandfather inherits part of your mother's inheritance, and then your uncle can inherit your grandfather's inheritance, so if your uncle does not give up the inheritance, he can only give it to him.
As long as you don't have any thoughts about the third party, you can face it correctly, explain it carefully, and then say that there is such a girlfriend, and you have to believe in each other.