Ask about relationships, about relationships

Your dilemma is that this colleague of yours is a person who does not know how to be grateful, and he ignores all your kindness and help to him, and even takes it for granted. So he's going to make you very upset, and that's normal. To put it bluntly, whoever meets such a person will not be happy, the problem is fundamentally his.

Since you have been helping him for so long and have not received the slightest recognition and gratitude from him, stop helping him, and when he asks, you can tactfully express your dissatisfaction. If he is a smart person, he will reflect on his actions.

If he is not smart, then you don't associate with him, which is also a way to protect yourself.

And the less you come and go, the better.

This may be related to his family background and character, don't always think of others very badly, you are a good person, helpfulness is a good quality, since you are helpful, you have to carry forward this kind of Jingshan, indeed, this kind of person is very disgusting, but you have to think about it, we do good deeds is not to make others grateful to us, but from the bottom of our hearts want to help others, as long as you do it according to your own wishes, don't look at how others are, always be the best yourself.

Tell him directly, he can be shameless, what face do you want for him? If men are like this, it will be troublesome, interpersonal relationships are very important, but this kind of man who only takes advantage and cannot give back should not treat him as a colleague, talk to him, and only work in the future, and everything will not help. It's a good thing to help others, but you have to divide the object, if you don't make it clear about this kind of person, it is possible that if you don't help him once, he will say in turn that yours is not, don't worry, this kind of person is not worth befriending.

I support you, don't let this kind of hour affect you.

1.That gay guy was too uninteresting.

2.You're good.

Sometimes helping people really doesn't mean you have to get people"Response"If there is a response, of course, I will be happier.

Your colleague's problem makes me think that he is not a good person, which is his shortcoming. (He probably won't change that in his lifetime.) It would be sad to do that)

If you can't persevere, then don't force yourself, and give up what you don't like. It's also very important to be happy, oh, the mood is refreshing, and the body is often Kangxi.

First of all, don't punish yourself for the mistakes of others

But are you really lacking communication about what kind of person he is? Miserly? Introverted?

Not good at words? Or shy? How much do you know about him?

Are you interested in getting to know him? Have you tried to communicate with him? Maybe a man doesn't like to be grateful, he may remember your good in his heart!

I forgot to give you money, which means that he is more informal, think about everything for the good!

I don't understand why you have to bring him food, is it inconvenient for him himself? What was the first time you brought him food? What kind of man is he?

It's not too late to have a comprehensive understanding of him and then analyze the countermeasures.

It is not difficult for a person to do good deeds, but it is rare to do good deeds in a lifetime!

Warm-hearted people, not on the spur of the moment!

Keep helping him, but speak the word!

Not everyone can be a colleague, this is also fate, cherish it!

I wish you all the best and have a good time!

Although doing good deeds is a very noble sentiment, but it also depends on the object, if I do things differently, with a colleague like you, I can't help him anymore, really, this kind of help doesn't make any sense, although you don't need to return anything, but you don't need to ask for anything in return, right? Follow your heart, it's more fun!

Good luck!

When you can't get him food due to leave or other reasons, you can text him to apologize, the tone is full of apologies, and then let him think for himself, continue to help him bring it next time, and then after a long time, I'm sure this trick will work.

There are little things between colleagues. But that's the kind of thing. You'd better just tell him. Speak in a calm tone. This will make it easy for him to accept.

Talk to him, helping others is action, be happy, communicate more this may be what you need.

Oh... At first glance, you can tell that he is a dirty man!! Just ignore him,,, it's annoying to look at!!

If you can't stand it, just say it, but you should speak in a calm tone, and you should communicate with him more often, so that maybe it will be better.

Ask him to accompany you to buy it, and everyone has to work hard.

If the little things are repeated in one life all the time, it will make people feel upset.

It's a trivial matter, what are you doing with so much, if you really can't do it, just say it to your face.

I suggest you watch "Wayward Weakness", watch it and then communicate together, OK? o(∩_o...

I feel like you're getting along very well!

In such a working environment, you can actually get along and become very good friends!

I feel like he is a little introverted and not very embarrassed to talk to you, so you can adjust your mood and communicate with him more!

I've been helping him bring food for a long time, and I don't help him bring it, doesn't it seem stingy?

It's nothing, it's just that you don't know how to deal with it!

Help him bring food, it's just by the way, and it won't be very tired, but you have to adjust your mentality and help him bring food every day with resentment, how tiring it is. Why don't you be happy, how good!

It's okay to make jokes when you give him food, for example.

You see, I bring you food every day, what a credit, you have time to invite me to dinner to thank you! Wait, let's ease the awkwardness.

It would be nice to know him.

Question 1: To exist in this society, we need certain means and methods to gain a foothold in this society. Hypocrisy and tactfulness are actually some of the rules of survival, which is the so-called "survival of the fittest".

As long as we seek to survive without violating the necessary moral code. As we grow from immature children to sophisticated adults, we gradually learn to be sensitive to words and feelings, and to treat friends and interact with people differently. We are not hypocritical and sleek all the time, and we cannot be sincere to sincere people all the time.

It depends on what the situation is in front of. Therefore, whether it is a type of person or a type of person, when it comes to our own interests, we will take different measures and treat it with different feelings! There is no right or wrong in this.

Question 2: The situation you are talking about is entirely true. Just like Liu Bei, Guan Yu, and Zhang Fei, their friendship.

Liu Bei treats his two brothers with fierce loyalty, but when faced with the struggle for power, he is cunning and cunning! But in the face of such Liu Bei, Guan Yu and Zhang Fei did not condemn their friends from the moral aspect, this is because what maintains them is a deep friendship. Therefore, if it is a true gentleman's friend, a true good friend, and the other party does not violate morality, law and harm their own interests, I think it is acceptable to accept such a good friend, after all, it is difficult to find a confidant.

Question 3: I can't answer whether your practice of "others are real to me, I am real to others, others are hypocritical to me, I am hypocritical to others" is correct, everyone has their own set of ways of making friends and code of conduct, so I think as long as you have a clear conscience.

Question 4: In life, you will inevitably come into contact with some "sleek" people, who often "talk about people when they see people, and talk about ghosts when they see ghosts". People envy their ability to be comfortable in front of others, but also hate their "tactfulness".

It is recommended that you check out Yang Zhihui's works, which may be useful to you.

Looking at this society from a different perspective, "hypocrisy" and "sleekness" are the rules of survival that we have to master. The above is a personal opinion only, and any similarities are purely coincidental.

Hello question, it's like this, I have a good relationship with my junior sister, and I'm not in the same group. I gave her a lot of things last year: more than 300 YSL anti-aging foundations, more than 100 Uemura eyebrow pencils, a bottle of Avène spray, two boxes of medical cold compresses**, and a butterfly necklace of more than 100.

There is also an acne cleanser and a source of gel. And this woman gave me some biscuits, two bottles of yogurt are so much, before the summer said that she would give me a bottle of sunscreen spray, said several times that she didn't send me at all, I said that I wanted to invite me to dinner and didn't invite.

Question: I'm a woman, I'm from an academy, she's a junior sister, and I'm not in the same group.

Blindly paying, others will only take this for granted.

Of course, people who know how to be grateful will not be like this.

When you want to give to a person, first look at whether the person is worth your effort, and whether he knows how to be grateful.

Ask the question, do you think this person is excessive, first of all, she is not poor, she said a few times that she wanted to give me sunscreen spray, but she didn't give it, and the sunscreen spray bought one get one free was only about 30 yuan, how much did I pay for you.

The question is that I have a good relationship with her. There is no interest relationship between us, but she said that she wanted to give it to me, but she didn't give it, and this kind of person is. First of all, I don't ask for anything from her.

Now that this has happened, you don't need to fall out with him. I understand that you also want to get the gift he gave you, not because you are short of money or anything, but you just want to get his approval, and you want to know that your friendship goes both ways.

Question: I sent her, not she sent me. I gave her so much, she didn't repay me, she just took it, and she had acne at that time and asked me, I took more than 100 of the family facial cleanser and gel to her, and she didn't return it to me.

This woman is quite scumbag, I think, either you don't say that you want to give me sunscreen spray or invite me to dinner, and you can't do it.

Now that I know what kind of person the other person is. Don't jump into more pits in the future.

In real life, there are still many "fishing" women.

Later, if the other person does not fulfill their promises, then you can further define your relationship, and if the other person has fulfilled their promises, then you can consider whether to continue.

Don't know how old you are. I can only talk about how I feel.

After reading your question, I feel that you are disgusted by the word hypocrisy and tactfulness. Your subconscious feels that hypocrisy and tactfulness are derogatory terms. Not really. You may be a student. I'll take schools as an example.

Let's take a very sleek example

In fact, tactfulness and hypocrisy are just a measure of what we say. When it should be sleek, it needs to be sleek, and when it should be firm, it should be firm.

Let's say you have dinner with your current boyfriend and ex-boyfriend. Your ex-boyfriend asks you. Do you think your current boyfriend is better or is it better for me?

Speak on different occasions.

My dad taught me the truth of being a man: be honest and open.

So do what you say. What you can't do needs to be rejected depends on the occasion to speak.

For example, a girl who refuses to show love to you should refuse tactfully. When you break up with your girlfriend, you have to break up firmly.

I think you have to be honest and sincere with your friends. You can be polite to people who have an average relationship. Politeness is not hypocrisy.

Personal views only:

1. Everyone has a preference, and the same is true for people, what kind of people they like to get along with and what kind of people they resist are normal, and it is not a problem of A or B.

2. There is such a person, if he can play tricks in front of some people, then he does not regard those people as friends, which has no effect on real friends, unless the one he sees is not a friend, he will mind very much, and will gradually become estranged;

3. People should be sincere to others, tolerant of things and things around them;

4. The word sleek is not just derogatory, but represents the person's thoughtfulness.

Almost distance yourself from them! Basically, they're all selfish people! You don't have to grieve yourself! Be strong yourself! Good friends are heart-to-heart! Two or three confidants in a lifetime are enough! There is no need to accommodate those who are selfish.

If you can be like-minded in making friends, life will be like a treasure, and there will be a person to discuss everything; In the face of any difficulties and obstacles, it is a great thing in life to rely on and support each other. If this is really the case, there will be few sighs of "I want to pay Qin Yao with my heart, there are few bosom friends, and who will listen to the broken strings".

Mencius said: "The acquaintance of people lies in knowing each other." The most important thing for people to know each other is to know each other.

So, how can we know people and hearts in interpersonal communication? First, we must constantly improve our ability to recognize people. This requires us to read more books, read good books, and start by improving our self-cultivation; Second, make friends with integrity, make friends with etiquette, and be a person who others think is worthy of deep friendship.

Respect it for a long time. Confucius admired Yan Tzu's attitude towards getting along with his friends, saying that he did not easily make friends with others, but if he made a friend, he would "respect him for a long time" and start and finish well. This is Yan Zi's way of maintaining his friendship with others, and it can be deeply appreciated by Confucius, which shows that it has its value.

Friends don't need to be so restrained, "respect for a long time", it will inevitably appear that the relationship is estranged. However, if we understand this "respect" as "respect", then it is not easy to "respect it over time" and stick to this way of getting along with friends for a long time.

Each of us has friends, but there are very few good beginnings and good ends, new friends are increasing, old friends are losing, as the so-called: acquaintances all over the world, how many people can know each other?

In addition to getting along with others and managing friendships in a way that is "respectful for a long time", we also need to maintain friendships in a way that "gets along with each other". In interpersonal communication, we should "respect everyone, especially our friends", and always "get along with each other", so that such interpersonal relationships and friendships can be maintained for a long time.