The advantages and disadvantages of the pleasing personality and the advantages of the pleasing pers

The pleasing personality, also known as the people-pleasing personality or the pandering personality, has the advantage of being observant, friendly, considerate, humble, sensitive, delicate and empathetic, and will easily win better interpersonal relationships.

And its disadvantage is that because of too much attention to other people's opinions, people with pleasing personality tend to lack assertiveness, lose themselves, and make themselves anxious.

The people-pleasing personality has many advantages that ordinary people do not have, as long as you give full play to the advantages of your personality and control the bad psychological habits that make you feel wronged, you can make yourself truly happy and make yourself stronger. There are five main core strengths:

What are the advantages of the people-pleasing personality that the average person does not have.

What are the advantages of the people-pleasing personality that the average person does not have.

Clause. 1. Be good at insight.

It is precisely because they are good at perceiving other people's behaviors and habits, and analyzing their preferences and psychological activities, that they can please others and meet their needs, which is the key.

Clause. 2. Perceive needs.

What are the advantages of the people-pleasing personality that the average person does not have.

What are the advantages of the people-pleasing personality that the average person does not have.

It can also be said to be empathy, they are good at transposing positions for others, understanding others' feelings, comparing their hearts to their hearts, so they can perceive the needs of others, and after they perceive and empathize, they are prone to accept others, take care of others, sacrifice or wronged themselves.

Clause. 3. Sensitive.

It is very sensitive to people's emotions, and is sensitive to the pros and cons of the characters involved in the handling of things and the outcome of things, and this sensitivity can become its own advantage when used properly.

What are the advantages of the people-pleasing personality that the average person does not have.

Clause. Fourth, think about others.

Being considerate of others is a virtue, and the people-pleasing personality has no trouble at all, as most of them are born with this virtue.

Clause. 5. Interpersonal communication.

As long as they are willing, this type of person has strong interpersonal skills, and will be very popular wherever they go. Of course, I don't think about the kind of people who bully and oppress the people-pleasing personality with bad intentions.

What are the advantages of the people-pleasing personality that the average person does not have.

To sum up, we can see that the above five are not only the core advantages of the people-pleasing personality, but it is precisely because these five core advantages account for too much of their ability advantages and are not reasonably played, but they let themselves be affected and wronged.

If you don't feel like you're too constrained, too wronged, and you're enjoying it, I don't think it's okay, because what you think is good is good. Good people are good to themselves, they can do good deeds with good intentions, and the final harvest is in their own spiritual quality, this kind of person is worthy of admiration, and ordinary people can't reach this realm.

For example, at the wine table, it is clear that you can't drink too much wine, but you don't refuse to toast wine, and in the end, you are still uncomfortable.

Can a people-pleasing personality be quit? Yes, but it's hard.

The people-pleasing personality is a cognitive defect that cares too much about what others think because it doesn't see its own strengths.

The people-pleasing personality is cultivated from a young age, from trying to satisfy your parents when you are a child, and when you grow up, you become satisfied with what others are doing for yourself, so that you can gain a little sense of security. The evaluation of others is becoming more and more important, and one's own value is becoming more and more ambiguous.

It is obviously not easy to get rid of such a habit, or to say that it is indifferent to the evaluation of others.

How to change the "pleaser" mentality?

1.Accept this imperfect world.

You can't control what other people think, and at the same time, you are not obligated to fully agree with what other people say. You should understand that self-worth is not determined by the evaluation of others, but by one's own evaluation.

Others are not obligated to like you, nor will they have too many ideas about what you do, and put less pressure on yourself.

When you don't do a good job, there is no need to criticize yourself, it is better to sum up the lessons and continue to grow.

2. Learn to say "no" and establish a sense of boundaries.

Putting yourself first doesn't mean being selfish. Perhaps you can find a quiet, undisturbed place to recall what you have done in the past and make a list of the things you don't like but that you have voluntarily done for others. Then, write why you don't want to do these things.

At this time, you will find that in fact, these things are contrary to your principles.

So, we have to stay true to our principles. To name a few chestnuts: I don't like negative energy, but what others ask me to do for help will make me feel bad, and I will refuse;

The things I want to help with must be in line with my values, otherwise I refuse; I'm going to get eight hours of sleep today, and if it's too time-consuming, I'll refuse ......

3. Accept the guilt you felt about rejecting someone for the first time.

The beginning of changing habits is always tough. Because of the habit of being centered on other people's emotions, it is difficult to say no words. When you say no, don't feel guilty, don't be sorry, because he will find another person who can help, or another solution.

If you're still soft-hearted, imagine the consequences of the incident on the flip side: I helped do something I didn't like......However, things can always be solved. Others don't have too many ideas because of a trivial matter.

4. Learn self-love and improve self-confidence.

Follow your heart, believe in yourself, and don't care too much about what other people think, because you will never be able to please everyone. Even if you get a lot of praise from others, this is not the real you, and learning self-love will reflect your value.

Don't always compare yourself to others, accept and love yourself more, and treat yourself as if you were a mentor and friend. If you have time, you might as well do something you like, get enough sleep, and maintain a good mental state. Confident people are the ones who are truly liked.

The obvious trait of the people-pleasing personality is that it is sensitive, and this type of person is always very sensitive to the needs of others. People with a people-pleasing personality are very quarrelsome with others or have any conflicts.

1. Since childhood, the people around me have been better and superior than themselves, and in order to find a sense of existence, they are willing to revolve around others. 2. I feel that the people around me don't like me, and I need to please others or do something to be recognized by others.

The people-pleasing personality means that he wants to do more actions to get the other party to be recognized by him, and he may give up some of his principles and ideas to accommodate others, hoping to leave some good impressions in the hearts of others.

Generally speaking, the most important characteristic of the people-pleasing personality is that they hide their emotions and are very afraid of conflict, so they will suppress their own needs. And to correct the people-pleasing personality, the best way is to face yourself truthfully, find a relationship that you can trust, and speak your thoughts very openly with each other, you will find that you are one step closer to the truth, and the truth will not damage your image, and you will gradually get out of the people-pleasing personality.

The people-pleasing personality refers to the personality that blindly pleases others and ignores one's own feelings, which is an unhealthy psychological state.

"The people-pleasing personality is a personality that pleases others while ignoring one's own feelings, and is a potentially unhealthy pattern of behavior, not a personality disorder. ”

The reason why you can't take the first step to love yourself is because deep down you can't accept who you are. You're used to devoting all your energy to warming others and gaining their approval, and once you stop doing so, you feel very guilty.

The pleasing personality is also a "pandering personality disorder", and the more common one is the "good old person".

The pleasing personality generally has several manifestations: the image of a "good old man". In interpersonal relationships, the image in people's minds is often a "good old man", but interpersonal relationships may not necessarily be very good, because you may feel uncomfortable after getting along with such a person for a long time.

It is very easy to get along with such a person at the beginning, and the "good old man" is usually very enthusiastic about colleagues and friends, behaves empatheticly, and likes to help others. But there is a premise for all this, that is, he really wants to be recognized or thanked by others, if he doesn't get this, then the "good old man" will be very painful in his heart, and there will be anger, but this anger he just lets himself know and will not show the slightest mind, and the "good old man" always treats others in a way that is not good for himself. Others who are dissatisfied with themselves will also feel that it is their own cause and find problems in themselves.

Sometimes I feel that I am such a personality, cautious, feeling that everyone else is right, that there is a reason for any mistake, and that no bad person in the world is a good person. I don't have any friends, and I like to be alone in my own world.

Are you a people-pleaser? When we come to this world, we must make friends, as the saying goes, we rely on our parents at home and our friends when we go out. Almost no one does not have a friend, interpersonal relationship is also an art, many times people get along with each other or speak are skillful, which leads to a lot of people with different personalities, among them, there is a character of people who suffer more, that is, the pleasing personality.

Personally, I believe that in order to get rid of the pleasing personality, we need to establish our own correct outlook on life, values and worldview, and we need to have our own independent value system.

My personal advice is to take up hobbies, such as singing, modern dancing or small instruments that are easy to learn. And stand up bravely, show your hobbies to your friends, repeat it many times, and you will find that you are slowly becoming more confident, and you will not subconsciously please others.

Be firm in your position, be brave enough to say no to things you don't like or don't want to do, set your own goals, work hard, take yourself seriously, and don't always take other people's ideas and opinions as the standard.

First of all, you must be aware that you have a "tendency to please". Start paying attention to your needs. Know yourself and see your own pattern of pleasing yourself. From this moment on, learn to say no.

Learn to say no, often autosuggest and express opinions positively, and be brave enough to fight back and insist on yourself in the face of others' doubts.

I think we should be ruthless, not think about others in everything, but also think more about ourselves.

First of all, be self-confident; Secondly, think more about your feelings and put yourself first; Finally, read more, travel more, and constantly enrich your inner world to make yourself stronger and stronger.

If you want to get rid of the people-pleasing personality, you must first learn to say no to others. Refuse unreasonable and inappropriate requests from others. Improve your self-confidence so that you can get rid of this type of personality.

Don't just give, improve your self-confidence, and make yourself more important.

To build self-confidence, you need to be strong, to constantly hint that you need to be independent, and to remind yourself that you don't need to get false friendships by pleasing others.

Mr. Li Shiqing, the lecturer of the Jingshi Boren Sahu Tanfantia course, said in the course that the pleasing type in the Satya model values others and the environment, and ignores oneself, trying to stay away from the people who put pressure on them or reduce the pressure caused by some people, hiding a lot of suppressed anger, because they feel that their anger is wrong and should not be, and when they find themselves angry, they often suppress their anger. Focusing on one's own expectations is also far from life force and low self-worth, but people who are people-pleasers are generally very good at caring for others and nourishing others, and are more intelligent and observant.

When it comes to change, first of all, we must look at our communication mode correctly, don't look at it as a bad aspect, it is ** in your own family, accompanied by yourself along the way, has been helping you maintain interpersonal relationships, if you want to improve, get used to pleasing friends, the key is not to rush to please others, but to pay attention to yourself first, pay attention to your own feelings, listen to your inner voice, and have the courage to say your true feelings. Therefore, the key to flattering communication is to be aware of and express one's feelings. While it can be difficult, practice can start with something simple and trusting.