What are the most short jokes, to be short, to be classic, to be humorous.

1. A: Why are the fish in the deep sea so ugly?

B: "I don't know. ”

A: "The answer is peacock, because, peacock will open the bottle!" ”

3, Tang Seng: "Wukong, can you turn into a piece of paper?" The kind that wants to be soft and comfortable. ”

Wukong: "Master, what's so difficult about this, the apprentice has 72 changes, and anything can be changed." ”

Tang Seng: "Then change quickly for the teacher." ”

Wukong: "Dare to ask the master why he is in such a hurry." ”

Tang Seng: "Dead monkey, hurry up, I ate the peaches you picked just now, I have a little diarrhea, I can't hold it back, you are fast, fast." ”

4, Xiaoyu made up the exam three times and finally passed, Lao Yu looked at the roll and burst into tears, hugged Xiaoyu and said: "Son, I feel a little relieved (fishy smell)." ”

Xiao Yu blushed and said timidly: "That's ......."So I'm going to spray some cooking wine? ”

The husband complained, "Honey, you gave my name to our puppy, so I would often get it wrong." ”

No, my voice is very kind when I bark a dog. ”

CS. There's a thief who doesn't bury the bag. Rub it to the bag point and throw the bag away, and it's over (the kind that presses g). The whole channel was scolded to death, and we were alone at that time, and we only had helplessness

Once upon a time, there was a man who received a fifteen dollar bill. He went to a small mountain village in the middle of nowhere and bought a lighter for a dollar. The man found two seven-dollar bills for him.

1. After the company gets off work, several computers get together to fight the landlord, and the water dispenser also has to play. He loses every time, but still insists on participating every day. The sofa was very incomprehensible and asked the chair:

The water dispenser loses every day, why is it still so energetic? The chair said, "Ask this kind of question, do you have water in your head?"

2 A gecko got lost in front of a ** company, and at this time a crocodile happened to crawl over and was going to eat it. In desperation, the little gecko stepped forward and hugged the crocodile's leg and shouted, "Mom!

The crocodile was stunned for a moment, and immediately burst into tears: "Son, I have slimmed you like this in just half a month?!" ”

3 Rice and buns fight, rice is overwhelming, and when they see something wrapped, they fight, and sugar buns, meat buns, and steamed dumplings are all spared. Zongzi was forced into a corner, and in a hurry, he tore his clothes and shouted: Look clearly, I am an undercover agent!

4 A patient with indigestion complained to the doctor: I have been very abnormal recently, what to eat and what to pull, cucumber to pull cucumber, eat watermelon to pull watermelon, how can I return to normal? The doctor is silent for a moment, then you can only eat.

Chinese Americans Japan ** fell on a desert island, when the ammunition ran out of food, God appeared, God said: I give you a chance to go home, there are ten watermelons and cherries here, you choose one and stuff it into PP, if you stuff ten and don't laugh, you can go home, if you laugh, you have to die. They agreed, and the Americans chose Pingguo, and the third one couldn't help laughing, and he died; The Chinese shrewdly chose cherries, stuffed to the eighth, suddenly laughed, and also died.

The American saw the Chinese in heaven and asked him why, and the Chinese said: "Yes, I saw the Japanese come with watermelons."

The TV is teaching children what to do when they are in danger. I wanted to test my two-year-old son, so I pretended to faint and see what he could do! The son shouted

Mom, Mom, what's wrong with you? And he broke my eyes with his hand and said, "Mom, are you really dead?" "After waiting for a while, I didn't hear anything from him.

Through my squinted eyes, I saw my son counting the money in my wallet.

The next day, a small blackboard was erected on the second floor: Thank you downstairs for your support! We will work harder to serve our students!

Sentence formation: My mom was tall, short, fat and thin.

Comment: I never knew your mom was a Transformer.

Sentence formation: A female girl came from afar.

Comment: I want to see a boy or a girl.

Sentence formation: What do you see, haven't seen it!

Comments: Haven't seen it.

Sentence formation: The train is coming, and besides, and (use and make a sentence).

Comment: Imagination surpasses earthlings.

A somewhat stupid person, go to the bazaar. When he saw a tomato seller, he thought he was selling blood, and the tomato seller explained it to him. Then he saw the trotters and thought they were feet, so he was given an explanation.

Later, he saw a truck-shaped pencil sharpener in the stationery store, and asked someone to explain to him, and after the explanation, he saw two people arguing, the man scolding the old witch of the woman, and the woman scolding the man's bastard, and finally he saw a man crushing a woman to death with a truck, so he called the police and said, "Hey? Police station?

I just saw a bastard crush an old witch in a pencil sharpener, and she shed a lot of tomatoes and pig's trotters flew far away. ”

The first nature is that it is not located.

On a high-speed train, a woman wanted to change a sanitary napkin, and after she had done it, she threw the used one out of the window. There was a farmer walking beside the railroad tracks, and just as the sanitary napkin snapped into the farmer's face, the farmer touched his face and found that it was stained with blood, and he sighed that the train was fast, and a piece of paper thrown from it broke my face.

A Chinese teacher from Shandong read the poem "Lying Spring" to the students.

The teacher reads aloud: One student dictated the following:

Wo Chun" "I'm Stupid".

Dark plum smells of flowers, I have no culture, lying on the branch and hateful bottom, I have a very low IQ, the shore is like a green, I am a donkey, the shore is like a green A big stupid donkey, I am lying like water from afar, I want to ask who I am, I am a big stupid donkey, the shore is green, I am a donkey, the shore is green, I am a donkey, the shore is green. I'm a stupid donkey.

Once upon a time there was a mountain, and there was a temple on the top, and there was a monk in the temple, and he was telling a story: Once upon a time there was a mountain, and there was a temple on the top, and there was a monk in the temple. He's telling a story: ......