What are some jokes that only boys can understand?

Go to the convenience store and buy something for 24 yuan - a message on the China Merchants Bank app, you spend 24 yuan; SMS a message, you spend 24 yuan; WeChat Pay a message, you spend 24 yuan. Stunned me: What did I buy and spend more than 70?

My mother said that I was sent by charging the phone bill, so I would play with my mobile phone every day, because there was a ** card in it. That's the smell of family.

A beggar on the street, who turned out to be a college classmate, was a little embarrassed at first, but when he found out that he had more money in his bowl than in mine, he seemed superior again.

Dad: "What do you want to do when you grow up?" Xiao Ming:

Be a patient" "Who wants to get sick" "Then be a doctor" "It's good to be a doctor, but what if you don't be a doctor" "Repair the pipeline" "What's the good about repairing the pipeline" "Or send the courier" "Are you playing with my computer" Dad beat Xiao Ming fat, Xiao Ming cried and said: Dad, I was wrong, I want to study hard, you can hire a tutor for me. "Dad, what does FBI mean?

Federal Bureau of Investigation. "What does that mean warning?" Then the father beat his son.

There was once a eunuch . . . It's gone below...

13 The Americans couldn't find a toilet in a hurry, so they became Jiang Guoren.

A man was walking on the road, and suddenly he took a big step to the right with his right leg, and then returned to his original walking position.

Boys who go out with their friends and drive out especially like to put their hands out of the car window. Let the wind blow in the palm of your hand.

went to watch a bai movie, and when I was waiting, I heard a sister chattering and hugging Zhi complaining about bangs cutting ugly dao

It's ugly, it's so angry....

The boyfriend finally couldn't hold back the fire and said: "It's endless!?" ”

After a pause, he continued: "Isn't it okay to lower your appearance a little bit and give others a way to live?" ”

It was almost a second of life and death.

I went to buy fruit today, and the checkout was a total of 260 yuan, and I said, "It's all old customers, and I wiped it off with a small amount." The boss was very cheerful: "Okay, then 256". I was in awe, you used to be a programmer at Kuaibo. ”

Went and bought a few boxes of bai today

Fruit, a total of 260 yuan. Du said: "It's all old customers, let's wipe it with zero dao." The boss was also very cheerful: "Okay,."

"Dad, what does FBI mean? FBI, what about the warning, and then the dad beat up his son.

Once upon a time, there was one.

With a height of 2.7 meters, his excessively high height has brought him distress. The witch told him: "There is a frog on the other side of the forest, you go and propose to it, and it rejects you once and your height will be shortened by 30 centimeters."

So the man set out on the road through the forest. Sure enough, he saw a frog, so he knelt down and asked the frog, "Will you marry me?"

The frog refused: "No! ”

Something miraculous happened, the height of this person was really shortened by 30 centimeters, becoming 2.4 meters.

He decided to propose to the frog one more time, so he asked the frog again: "Will you marry me?" ”

The frog said, "No! "The man's height became 2.1 meters. Then he thought "one last time to propose, 1.8 meters tall is the most perfect." ”

So, he knelt down one last time and asked the frog, "Will you marry me?" The frog got angry and cried out impatiently, "How many times have I told you, no! No! No! No! No! No! ”

"I didn't sleep well last night, and my back hurts. "

Don't do such intense exercise at night. ”

Playing a civilized term that is only used in the men's toilet, a small step forward, a big step towards civilization, I think only boys should know the meaning, haha!!

A beautiful woman had an affair with three men, one surnamed Gao, one surnamed Li, and one surnamed Chen. A few months later, the beautiful woman gave birth to a son. But he couldn't determine which was the child's father, and he was worried about the child's name, A smart friend named the child: Guo Chunhai. The beautiful woman is very happy.

In 20xx, an old man was dying, and his lips trembled and he said to his grandson:"The child ......and so on......Stamp duty ......It's lowered, and it must be ......To write ............ on paperBurn it to me, I'm going to invest underneath. "The child said:

Don't worry, grandpa, I will try to live until that day. "After listening to his grandson's words, the grandfather closed his eyes in satisfaction. In 21xx, an old man who was about to die knelt in front of the grave and couldn't help but burst into tears

Grandson, for so many years, I have been waiting, and I have not waited for the stamp duty to be lowered, I am ashamed of my ancestors! "After speaking, he was angry and angry, and he trembled twice and stopped moving. Those eyes are still wide, and they can't be blinded!!

After his grandson died, he went to heaven, and one day he met God, and God said, "I can grant you a wish." He said:

Can you sink the island of Japan? "God said, "It's too difficult, so let's change it."

The grandson said again:"Then I want the stamp duty to be lowered. "God wiped the sweat from his head and said:

What was your last wish? Bring me the globe.

Drag racing On this day, the upstart drove his expensive Porsche Mercedes on the road. Suddenly! A wolf 125 caught up from behind, and the old Abel knight on the locomotive turned to him and said:

Juvenile! Have you ever ridden a Wolf 125? After finishing his words, he whistled by.

When the upstart heard it, he was quite angry: "The little 1 Wild Wolf 125 also dares to grab it from my Porsche?!" So, with a step on the accelerator, he surpassed the old man ...... with full horsepowerUnexpectedly, within 3 minutes, the old man caught up with ...... againJuvenile!

Have you ever ridden a Wolf 125? In the same way, when he finished speaking, he whistled by. "Wow!

Provocations again and again?! The upstart stepped up his horsepower again and quickly left the old Abel behind. It didn't take long for the old Abel to catch up again!

But this time, just when Old Uncle was about to overtake the upstart, he fell! And slipped out. The upstart saw it and quickly got out of the car to see the ...... of the old man's conditionI saw the old Abel sit up slowly, and said to the upstart with a bloody and helpless expression:

Boy! Have you ever ridden a Wolf 125?? Can't you tell me where the brakes are......”

I have a joke, it's super funny, but there are so many people like you who publish it, you can't tolerate me.

One day. The ant said a word to the elephant. After hearing this, the elephant fainted directly. This phrase that the ant said to the elephant. It is. I'm pregnant with your child.

The joy of Beijing ** radio is very good, you can listen to it.

I was born in a very poor family, I remember when I was a child, my father's life was very boring, I could only count money all day long, and my mother too, I was sweeping money all day long; My family lives in the mountains, and every time I want to go out to buy something, it is quite troublesome, it takes 5 hours to drive a Porsche, and it takes 4 hours to drive a Mercedes-Benz; Although there is *** at home, it is difficult to find a parking space when driving there, which is quite inconvenient; I would occasionally go shopping, and my parents were afraid that I would be kidnapped, so I was protected by more than 20 bodyguards, and everyone was scared away when they saw me, so I was ostracized from ...... since I was a child

Because the family is deep in the mountains, it is very cold every winter, and my father also said that it is very troublesome to go out to buy things, so there is no stove ...... in winterNo quilt ......I can only accompany my parents to burn money for heating ...... every dayAnd when I sleep, I can only sleep with money (I definitely have a warmer pound).

I remember when I was a child, once, because the room was too big, I didn't rush out of the room, so I peed my pants, so my father put a little sheep locomotive in my room, so that I could rush out of the room of 1000 square meters within 10 minutes, cross the corridor of 5 kilometers, and reach the toilet of 800 square meters (I often get lost in the corridor); Dad asked someone to build 20 600 square meters with 250 square meters of small toilets in the broken room, said: If the urine is wet in the future, directly change the room, if the room is not enough or too small, then tell Dad, Dad will call someone to build a few more rooms, our life is very hard, you have to endure it! Now that I think about it, Dad is such a kind person!

I remember one time when the house was burglarized by a thief who used a de-tona-tor to blow up my dad's safe, causing the gold coins to roll out of the house, and as a result, the thief was crushed to ...... deathI think that thief is so pitiful......It hurts to crush people to death with gold coins! He wasn't as lucky as the thief who had been smothered by the banknotes before. My mother also used to tell me that our family was very difficult ......I want to learn to endure hardships ......So I have developed a hard-working spirit since I was a child, and my future volunteer is to find 200 monsters who can only eat money, so that I can eat up all the money in my family and avenge those poor thieves!

After reading it, take it

1. The little girl in kindergarten asked the teacher: Can my grandmother get pregnant at the age of 80? Teacher:

No. And what about my sister who is eighteen years old? Teacher:

Yes. And what about me being eight years old? Teacher:

No. The little boy next to me: Hehe, I said it's okay!

Second, the African black girl traveled to Shanghai and lived in a hotel. A fire broke out in the middle of the night. The African woman ran out as fast as she could. A firefighter saw it and said in surprise: My mother, alas, she is scorched and still running so fast!

Third, the wolf cubs from the snack vegetarian. The wolf father and the wolf mother racked their brains to train it to hunt. Finally, one day, the wolf father and the wolf mother were pleased to watch their son chase a rabbit. The wolf cub grabbed the rabbit and said fiercely: Boy, hand over the carrots.

4. Before the wedding, the groom asks the officiant: How much does it cost to officiate at a wedding? The officiant said: The more beautiful the wife, the more money. The bridegroom was embarrassed to give a dollar. The officiant was stunned, glanced back at the bride, and then looked for 5 cents ......

5. The prisoner was executed. Due to the poor quality of the bullets, the first shot did not go off ......Then a second shot was fired......The third shot ......This is, the prisoner cried, hugged the bailiff's thigh and said: Big brother, you strangle me, it's so scary.

6. Yesterday I dreamed that God would grant me a wish. I took out the globe and said let the world be peaceful. He said it was too hard to change it! I took out your picture and said make this person pretty. God thought about it for a moment, let's talk about world peace!

Seventh, a woman is ugly and can't get married. I want to be trafficked. Finally, one day a dream will come true. But it didn't sell for half a month. The kidnappers sent it back. She was adamant. The kidnapper gritted his teeth and stomped his feet: go, the car is gone.