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If your mother-in-law refuses to work, it is understandable that you are psychologically uncomfortable.
But as an elder, my mother-in-law is a contribution, and it is natural not to do it. Don't force it, or it's unpleasant.
You and your husband just have to do more.
It's best to find a way to make your mother-in-law happy, and the problem will be solved.
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It's a favor to do it, and it's a part not to do it. If she doesn't come to your house, you don't do all the housework. Adjust your mentality, don't treat the old man as a servant, your parents have worked hard for most of their lives, and it's time for them to enjoy their happiness.
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and the person you love the most are so calculating, a big man can die if he works more, is he so tired?
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When living with my in-laws, if a conflict arises and I find that my husband is more inclined to support my parents, I will take the following measures to deal with the situation:
1.Communication and understanding: First and foremost, I will have an open and honest communication with my husband to understand his views and feelings.
I would try to understand why he was more inclined to support his parents and discuss it in order to find a common understanding and solution. By listening to each other and understanding each other, I hope to be able to find a balanced and just solution.
2.Respect and respect for family values: In-laws are an important part of marriage, and they have their own family values.
I will respect their opinions, decisions, and lifestyles, and I hope they will respect my husband's personal wishes and choices. By respecting family values with each other, a foundation for mutual understanding and harmony can be established.
3.Seek compromises and compromises: If there is a conflict between my in-laws and myself, I will try to find compromises and compromises to meet the needs and expectations of all parties.
This may include setting family rules, distributing responsibilities or resources wisely, etc. Through compromise and compromise, conflicts and disputes can be reduced and a harmonious family environment can be created.
4.Seek a neutral third party: If personal communication and efforts do not resolve the conflict, consider seeking the assistance of a third party.
This can be a family counselor, a psychologist, or a friend or relative, etc. The neutrality and expertise of a third party can help all parties to recognize and understand the problem more objectively and find solutions.
5.Self-growth and inclusion mindset: When dealing with conflicts, I think about my own growth and development.
This includes cultivating an inclusive, tolerant, and understanding mindset, learning to see things from the perspective of others, and seeking self-reflection and improvement. Through self-growth, I can better deal with family conflicts and promote family harmony and personal happiness.
6.Options for independent living: If the above efforts do not resolve the conflict, and there is a clear conflict between my in-laws and my own values, I will discuss with my husband whether to consider the option of independent living.
This needs to take into account a variety of factors, including economic, personal, and emotional aspects. If independent living is the best option, I try to make plans and seek support with my husband.
In general, when living with my in-laws, when conflicts arise, I deal with them through communication, understanding, respect, and compromise. At the same time, I will seek third-party assistance and self-growth to find solutions and build a harmonious family environment. If necessary, I also consider my own life options and make decisions with my husband.
Most importantly, keep an open mind and maintain the stability of your marriage and family through love and care.
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Each of us wants to have a happy married life, but after getting married, we will face a realistic choice, that is, whether we want to live with our parents-in-law after marriage. A satisfactory solution to this problem requires a comprehensive analysis on a case-by-case basis. ......Specifically, whether you can accept living with your parents-in-law after marriage depends on the relationship between yourself and your parents-in-law, whether you can adapt to each other's living habits, and whether you can have a relatively independent living space.
1. The relationship between yourself and your parents-in-law is the key to whether you can accept living with them.
After getting married, whether you can live with your parents-in-law or not-in-law is the emotional state between yourself and them. ......This question is actually very easy to understand. Specifically, if you have a harmonious relationship with your parents-in-law, then there is no obstacle to living with them, and you can get a lot of care from them after marriage, which will be extremely beneficial to your happy life after marriage.
2. Whether the living habits can adapt to each other is an important factor in whether you can live with your parents-in-law after marriage.
An important factor that affects the life of living with my parents-in-law after marriage is whether they can adapt to each other's living habits. ......Because the age gap is very large, there must be a very big difference in the living habits between myself and my parents-in-law. If you don't fit in with each other in this area, it's hard to live together.
Only when they can adapt to each other's living habits and tolerate each other, can it be possible to live with their parents-in-law after marriage.
3. Whether you can have an independent living space is the decisive factor for whether you can live with your parents-in-law after marriage.
Even if you and your parents-in-law have a harmonious relationship and can adapt to each other's living habits, it cannot ensure the harmony and happiness of living together after marriage. ......There is also a decisive factor in this, that is, whether you can have a relatively independent living space, so as to avoid your life being disturbed, and you can have a life that truly belongs to you. ......The ideal state is to live in the same building with your parents-in-law, but each of them lives in an independent house, so that you can take care of each other and maintain a relatively independent life, which is the most ideal state, and you can definitely accept this kind of living with your parents-in-law.
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In the eyes of the in-laws, children are their food and clothing, representing the continuation and inheritance of the family. Therefore, in the concept of in-laws, the son is one of the important people responsible for the continuation of the family. For the in-laws:
Raising children to prevent old age", I'm just such a son, he was raised by me with hard work, what will I do if I'm not with him. As daughters-in-law, we should be aware of what we should do if we live with our in-laws.
1. Don't care too much about your in-laws' opinions. What your in-laws say about you depends on the other person's cognition. Whether it's praise or denial, but I just want you to listen to her, remember"I am the mistress of the house"Mental method, if the in-laws are right, just listen, if they are not right, they will pull it, and you don't have to be too serious.
2. The best boundary to have a sense of boundary in life is not to meddle in things, and if it does not belong to your own small family, you will not ask. Because, people don't necessarily think of you, after all, you are an outsider made of socks in their big family, otherwise you will be gossiped about, and the gains outweigh the losses.
3. Be sure to tell Jianheng to refuse her in-laws to clarify their bottom line, and they will resolutely refuse to cross the line, so you don't have to wronged yourself. If you blindly compromise and suppress yourself, you will only slowly force yourself into a resentful woman, lose the authority of the hostess, and refuse to live a better life for your in-laws and let your in-laws have clear boundaries.
After all, there is a generation gap between the two generations, and their living habits and ways of thinking are very different or very different, and living together for a long time will inevitably lead to contradictions, and these contradictions are difficult to run into.
It is true that raising one's own biological children should be filial, but there is no need to hang on to them, because I feel that I have no spiritual trust without my children.
The elderly can also have their own lives, rather than having to get involved with their children. Any relationship needs to maintain a certain distance, and this is true for parents and children, as well as between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
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Dealing with conflicts with your in-laws is a challenging task that requires a combination of family relationships, communication skills, and problem-solving skills. Here are some suggestions, but keep in mind that every family and situation is unique, and it's up to you to decide how to handle it on a case-by-case basis.
1.Be open and open and open in communication: Talk openly and honestly with your husband about your feelings and concerns, and share your perspective on the current situation. Try to understand his position on his parents and express your desire to find a solution with him.
2.Respect and understanding: Try to be respectful and understanding, including with your husband and his family. Try to see all sides of the problem, including the needs and concerns of both parties. Respect each other's views and feelings, and strive to reach a compromise.
3.Look for compromises: Look for compromises that are acceptable to both parties. This may involve setting common rules, assigning responsibilities, dividing personal space and time, and maintaining open lines of communication to resolve potential conflicts.
4.Seek help from a third party: If you are unable to resolve conflicts on your own, you may want to consider seeking help and assistance from a third party, such as a family counselor, marriage counselor, or other professional.
They can provide neutral advice and tips to help you find better solutions.
5.Self-Adjustment and Finding Support: When dealing with this challenge, it is important to maintain balance and self-adjustment. People looking for support, such as friends, loved ones, or other social support systems, can provide emotional support and advice.
In the end, resolving the conflict with the in-laws requires the cooperation and efforts of both parties. By communicating openly and respectfully, finding common solutions, and maintaining the goal of a good family relationship, you can better handle this challenge and gradually improve and improve the family atmosphere.
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I think it's not unfilial that juniors don't want to live with the elderly. It's about the need for separate spaces for both sides. After all, there is a generational gap between the old and the young.
Work and rest time, living habits. Eating habits and so on are not the same. So barely living together.
It's also very tiring. Older people like to wake up early every day. Young people like to sleep in the morning.
Older people like to eat a light diet. And young people like to eat big fish and meat. There are a lot of different places.
So you put these two kinds of people together. Definitely uncomfortable on both sides. It's better to separate than both of you are uncomfortable.
If Becky and the elderly don't live together. You can choose between a community or a building. Buy two houses to live in. Once there is a problem, the junior can arrive in time to take care of the elderly. That's fine, there's no need to huddle under one roof all day.
Whether the juniors are filial or not. It's not about living under one roof or not. Many juniors live under the same roof with the elderly.
I didn't see how filial they were. The same old man, serving them all day long. Cook for them, do laundry, take care of the kids.
In the end, I was still not satisfied. I always pick three or four. So.
The elderly themselves should also take the initiative to separate from the younger generations and not be with them. Isn't it nice for the elderly to live independently on their own? If.
I lost my wife. Then find another one. Two elderly people take care of each other together.
It's a good lifestyle, and the diet is the same. So whenever I feel like I can take care of myself as long as I can live on my own. Don't live with juniors.
This is not a question of filial piety or filial piety. An old man who is about 60 years old now. Most of them are only children.
He had a child. After the child gets married. Gave birth to another child.
They are a family of three. To take care of four elderly people. Who do you want to live with?
It's inconvenient to live with anyone. I live with my in-laws. Maybe the daughter-in-law and her in-laws still have conflicts and quarrels.
On the contrary, it was unpleasant. People don't often say that distance produces beauty. So the two generations don't live together.
Occasionally, we get together and it feels fresh. Isn't that a great thing? There is no need.
Don't kidnap younger generations with morality. If you don't live with the elderly, you are unfilial. This is all the concept of when.
How do I feel like this concept in the Qing Dynasty? Now the concept has been completely changed, and there is no such thing as filial piety or non-filial piety. They all live independently.
And the elderly also have pensions. There are also many nursing homes available in the community. can solve the problems of the elderly.
Why not tie young people together?
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Living with her mother-in-law is such a trouble, she also treats her son as a big baby and is willing to serve him, but the daughter-in-law is not born to her, of course, the mother-in-law will not be willing to wash the daughter-in-law's clothes, but will train the daughter-in-law as a nanny, so that in the future she is not there, you can take over her class to serve her son, as for whether you marry a wife or give someone a free nanny, it is not her problem.
And your husband feels very comfortable, on the one hand, he feels that his mother has done part of the housework and done the part of "he should do" for him, and on the other hand, he thinks that you should respect the old man (he will not think that he is not filial and let his mother be a cow and a horse), and should do the housework. In this way, he will never grow up, you are just married to a big baby.
There is nothing unreasonable in the family, the key is to see how you deal with it, it is best to move out as soon as possible, so that your husband can really understand that he is married, and he will be a father in the future, he is an adult with family responsibilities, not a giant baby who is cared for and served.
When you live with your in-laws when you don't have children after marriage, it won't affect your married life at all, you both have jobs, go out early and return late, when, or what time you go home at night, someone will open the door for you, and in the morning you will sleep until you have to go to work before you get up, at this time, or your father-in-law has already prepared breakfast for you, you can go away after breakfast, and your family doesn't have to care about anything, you don't have to worry about anything, You don't have to worry about any water, electricity, and gas bills, if you want to go out to play, you will leave for three or five days, ten days and a half months, and your home will be safe and sound, and thieves will never dare to patronize it.
The daughter-in-law lives with her in-laws, and some of the harmonious coexistence is that it requires two generations to tolerate each other, respect each other, understand each other, trust each other, and pay a lot. In fact, it is best for the two generations to live separately, which will reduce a lot of depression and friction, maintain their own living habits, will not cause friction because of the habits between the two generations, maintain their own life independence, the relationship may be better, I hope that all families can coexist peacefully, and create a harmonious and stable harmonious and happy family!
Some people are obedient and angry with their in-laws, but they still have to swallow their anger. Some people's in-laws know well, so they get along well like a family.
Everyone's life experience is different, and the habits they develop are different. Different habits, there are many contradictions when living together! The elderly are generally very thrifty, thrifty, a lot of useless things are reluctant to throw, occupy a lot of space, a lot of things are still repetitive things, but also like to pull ropes in the building, smash nails, these habits are different from young people, young people like electronic products, like to give up. >>>More
Of course, it is to bring it yourself, what kind of parents bring out what kind of children, now education is very important, especially education from an early age, when you grow up, you can see the shadow of your parents from a person, and give your child the best way you think.