Mother in law and daughter in law are difficult to get along with, if the mother in law can carry it

After getting married, many women start to maintain a good relationship with their mother-in-law. After all, she is the mother of their favorite person. But later, after getting along, I realized that the truth is not as simple as I imagined.

Many families are in conflict. In the final analysis, this is due to the mother-in-law relationship. So, how can a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law get along comfortably?

A neighbor's eldest sister who has become a mother-in-law, after a day of trouble with my mother-in-law, taught me some heartfelt words, I think, she knows best.

After I got married, my mother-in-law always said in front of outsiders from time to time that she regarded me as her own daughter. At first, I was so moved that I secretly vowed to treat her as my mother. But after getting along, it got worse and worse, and even angry:

Do you treat your daughter like this? My neighbor's sister told me that, in fact, my idea was wrong from the start.

The mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are not related by blood. Whether she subjectively intentionally or spoke, she could not treat her daughter-in-law as her own daughter. A daughter-in-law doesn't have to have such expectations.

After all, the greater the hope, the greater the disappointment. Again, there is no need to treat your mother-in-law as your own mother. After all, there are twenty or thirty years between you and her.

Think about it. They didn't know each other until their daughter-in-law entered her mother-in-law's house. As soon as they got married, they demanded that they be as good as family to each other.

This is unrealistic.

The neighbor's sister said that the best relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is not "as close as mother and daughter", but "polite and polite". You must know that "as close as a mother and daughter" is fake when you hear it, and it takes years of running-in and bumps to get it, and you have to go through countless compromises and concessions in the middle. Once you can't be evenly matched, it's not "as close as a mother and daughter", but "the same as water and fire", such a comparison is still "polite and polite" is more worry-free.

The neighbor's sister and mother-in-law were like that. The children take care of them themselves. Their father-in-law and mother-in-law don't live here.

Usually, she and her husband make decisions at home. Her father-in-law and mother-in-law never intervene. A family of three went on a trip.

When they see souvenirs, they buy some souvenirs to send to their in-laws' homes. When their in-laws grow some produce in their hometown, they also send them in. The two sides get along very well, and the taste of "courtesy and exchange" tastes really polite.

But the neighbor's sister said it was good. She was cold. She is not jealous, nor does she bother to deal with the sticky relationship between her mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.

She thinks it's a good day.

I have to say that the neighbor's sister lives a very smart life. Currently, how many conflicts between mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law are caused by sticky relationships and unclear boundaries. When a woman gets married for the first time, it is the bottom line between her mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.

Whether expressed verbally or through deeds, it should be clear to both parties at this time.

If you want to keep clear boundaries, the best way to do this is "distance produces beauty". If you have to live together, make an appointment in advance about the responsibilities of both parties. If the other party crosses the line on something, it needs to be reminded many times, and even appropriately reminded the other person.

Tear the skin of the face" to get the other party's attention.

In terms of life, money, interests, getting along, and emotions. If you can respect your daughter-in-law in these aspects, then your daughter-in-law should know how to be content.

It is to care more about your daughter-in-law, treat her as your own daughter, and don't treat her as an outsider.

If your mother-in-law treats you very well after you are pregnant, takes very good care of you, always cooks you very good food, and gives you money, it shows that this mother-in-law is very good.

Everyone has their own way of getting along, mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are the same, and some mothers-in-law and daughter-in-law get along like each otherMother and daughter alikeThe relationship between the two people is particularly good, but some get alongIt's not closeBut it's okay, and it's even moreLook at each other like enemies and don't like each other, every marriage is the first thing that some people think about isMother-in-law and daughter-in-law relationship, I wonder if I will be embarrassed by my mother-in-law in the future, whether I will be bullied by my mother-in-law's family, a woman most hopes to find a other half who loves her and loves herself, and then has a small home of her own, a warm home, which is what most women want, but,It often backfires, Many contradictions appear in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and the most difficult thing when the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law fight is the middlemanThe character is the one who is the husband's son, I don't know who to help, I can't help, one is my wife, I want to accompany himA wife who spent the rest of his life with,One is my motherThe mother who gave birth to him and raised him,Therefore, he could only watch painfully to see who could hold on to the end, but in the end, he couldn't stand it anymore and could only end up with a divorce.

In the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, it cannot be said that the daughter-in-law always tolerates it, nor can it often let the mother-in-law tolerate it, in fact, this is both sides, whether it is marriage or dealing with the relationship, you must remember to take a step back, and the days will beFor a long timeAs long as you remember that you have one man in common, that person isA son of man is also a husband, you have a conflict that will only make this man embarrassed, and the best way is to live in peace.

I have a friend, she is 33 years old this year, she just got married two years ago, she also had that concern before she got married, and when she was a week away from getting married, she was still thinking about the futureWill there be problems with the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law?, once asked me, "".Will my future mother-in-law embarrass me in the future, and if so, wouldn't it be a leap into the fire pit to get married?"I just asked her rhetorically".Do you love that man"She says love, and then I tell her".Since you love, since you have chosen, then don't have any worries, that man is not you alone, he is also the son of your mother-in-law, treat your mother-in-law with heart in the future, people's hearts will change people's hearts, and time will prove it"It's been two years now, and the relationship between her and her mother-in-law has not had any conflicts to be honest, and the relationship with her husband is stillIt's still the same.

As long as two people live together, it is impossible to have no contradictions, even mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are the same truth, and they should also tolerate each other, understand each other, care for each other, even if they can't treat each other as their own mother or daughter, as their own relatives, they should do it. In life, there are also many mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law who live well together and are as close as a family.

To be honest, it is impossible to get along well, so my understanding is not to have too many illusions about the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, let alone think too much, the reason is: mother-in-law is not a mother, daughter-in-law is not her own child, too hard to mother-in-law's family looks down on, too far away and you will not come, then simply treat as a stranger, respect and stay away, do not hold out hope, do what you should do, well, calmly live a good life with your husband, and take care of your baby!

This could be written in a book that is divided into dozens of situations.

The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is the most complex relationship between people. and subject to the relationship between the mother-in-law and the son.

To deal with it well, it must be handled according to the different situations of the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.

For example, a housekeeper-type mother-in-law. You need a daughter-in-law who is obedient to everything.

A career-oriented mother-in-law needs an almighty housekeeper-type daughter-in-law.

I don't mind if my son is good to my daughter-in-law.

Some unreasonable mothers-in-law can't see that their sons are good to their daughters-in-law, and she will even be jealous of her daughter-in-law and deliberately sow discord in front of her son, just to let her son alienate her daughter-in-law.

The mother-in-law with high emotional intelligence hopes that her son and daughter-in-law are good, she understands that her son has grown up and is married, not only her son, but also the husband of her daughter-in-law, the father of her grandson (granddaughter), the pillar of the family, and the support of her later life.

She wants her son to be happy, and her son's happiness comes from her daughter-in-law. Only when the two of them love each other and support each other can a family prosper and be happy. She not only supports her son to be good to her daughter-in-law, but she will also be good to her daughter-in-law, which is actually helping her son build a happy family.

People's hearts are made of meat, and the daughter-in-law will remember the good of the mother-in-law.

Don't have a confinement feud with your daughter-in-law.

A woman has just given birth to a child, and her body and spirit are the most fragile and sensitive, and if her mother-in-law does not serve well or deliberately makes things difficult, then this month's hatred, the daughter-in-law will remember it for a lifetime.

A mother-in-law with low emotional intelligence will provoke her daughter-in-law during confinement, and by doing so, she is undoubtedly declaring war on her daughter-in-law, without considering the consequences at all. That's why there are so many evil mothers-in-law who have a bleak night, and they are all to blame.

The first choice for the family is to be honest with each other, and then the daughter-in-law should regard the mother-in-law as her own mother, and the mother-in-law should treat the daughter-in-law as her own daughter and communicate more.

Don't interfere too much in the emotional life of your son and daughter-in-law, don't manage and ask about your son's salary, don't care about your daughter-in-law's family affairs, don't always interfere with your daughter-in-law's spare work and rest time, if you can do these 4 points, you will be able to have a harmonious environment with your daughter-in-law, and there will be no many conflicts between you.

Don't take care of your son's wild pants and your daughter-in-law's housework, don't care about what your daughter-in-law buys, don't speak ill of your daughter-in-law, and don't live with your daughter-in-law's socks, these 4 bottom lines will not be touched.

Do not interfere in the son's family affairs, let the daughter-in-law have her own opinions, do not speak ill of the daughter-in-law, and do not prevent the daughter-in-law from disciplining the child.

The mother-in-law should pay special attention to her daughter-in-law, tolerate her daughter-in-law, be very good to her daughter-in-law, and it is best for the mother-in-law to be less involved in the affairs between their husband and wife, so that the daughter-in-law can treat her mother-in-law well.

I think first of all, the mother-in-law must learn to let go, the mother-in-law must respect some choices of the daughter-in-law, the mother-in-law must keep pace with the times, and the mother-in-law must love her daughter-in-law.

Learn to let go; Keep pace with the times; Respect your daughter-in-law; When the daughter-in-law is confined, the mother-in-law should take good care of her.