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This is a very complex issue that needs to be decided on a case-by-case basis. Here are some factors to consider:
1.If you think you and your boyfriend have a deep bond and that you're having a good time, then this could be a great reason to stay together. However, if you find that your values, lifestyle, or goals do not align, then this can be an obstacle in your future life.
2.If you think that poverty and shabby are only temporary, and that your boyfriend has the potential to make a difference, then consider giving him more support and encouragement. However, if your boyfriend lacks the desire to pursue a better life, or if he is not clear about his plans for the future, then this can become a problem.
3.You can consider whether there is a basis for mutual respect and understanding between you and your boyfriend. If you find that you are often resentful of his poverty and shabbyness, or that he is often unresponsive to your expectations and needs, then it could mean that there is an unhealthy relationship dynamic between you.
In the end, it is a personal decision that takes into account your own values, goals, and aspirations. If you think that getting married is an important choice for you, then you may need to learn more about the relationship between you and your boyfriend, as well as his plans and attitudes for the future.
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If you are a woman who is content with the status quo, marry him, because such a man is where you belong. But if you're a more active girl, find a new one, but only if you have the capital
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What you want is to motivate him, no matter who a man is for, he needs to pay more attention to fame and fortune. Love you can't be bread.
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When we look at whether a person is worthy of being with him for a lifetime, we need to consider the whole of a person, such as looking at a person's financial ability; understand the qualities of a person's personality; whether they are responsible and self-motivated; whether the external image is in line with one's own vision; whether they are comfortable and filial piety, that is, how the other party's emotional intelligence is; Whether the other party is good to themselves or not, etc.
Therefore, you can think about it first, although the other party has a "relatively poor" such a shortcoming, is there any shining point in the other party that can attract you?
The other party is poor, and the remorse should have lasted for a long time, maybe when the other party was with you, it may be a relatively poor state, so why do you choose to be with the other party? What are some of the things about the other party that attract you and allow you to tolerate the other party's "poorer" shortcomings?
Therefore, to judge whether a person is worthy of being together for a long time, we need to evaluate the overall value of a person, understand the overall value of the other party, and finally make a choice to continue or give up through the overall understanding of this person.
For example, although the other party is relatively poor, but very motivated, it is very promising to bring you a good material foundation in the future, plus he is very good to you at the moment, takes care of your emotional feelings, and treats feelings loyally and dedicatedly, and his external image is also passable, then he is completely a potential stock.
Of course, if the other party is not only poor, but also useless in other conditions, then it is natural for him to choose to break up because of this. After all, one's youth is also precious, and there is no reason to waste one's youth on someone who is almost impossible to bring happiness to oneself.
In addition, when choosing a mate, you also need to sort the value of your mate selection criteria. For example, some people care most about whether their partner is rich or not; Some people are Yan Kong; Some people are more insecure, so they care most about whether their partner can understand them and so on.
So I also need to look at what conditions I care more about when choosing my other half, and which conditions are relatively less important to me?
If for yourself, your boyfriend's money is the most important thing, and in comparison, other conditions are not very important, then you can naturally choose to break up because your boyfriend is poorer, and then find a richer boyfriend, even if the other conditions of the new boyfriend are not as good as the current one.
Secondly, you can choose to break up because your boyfriend's conditions are not good, and then find a partner with better conditions. It's just that relatively speaking, if you want to find a better object, you also need a high enough value condition. Otherwise, if you look down on others, others may not look down on you!
Therefore, you can choose to break up because your boyfriend is poor. It's just that if you want to find a better object than your current one, you may also need to improve yourself and make yourself have higher value conditions, so that you can finally have a better object.
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The boyfriend is poor and not motivated, and it is recommended to break up.
Poverty is not terrible, but if he is poor, but he is poor and justifiable, living a poor life, but he does not want to make progress, and just lives with the mentality of having something to eat, this problem is very serious, and it is recommended to break up; Another is that although he is poor, he has a plan for himself and is enterprising. At this time, we should see the huge potential behind him. This kind of boy is worth waiting for, and it is worth the girl to pay for him.
Jack Ma was also poor back then. I don't know how poor your boyfriend is, it doesn't matter if you want to break up with him or not, it's just that your values are different, and he can't meet the daily expenses you think. It has nothing to do with whether he is poor or not.
As the saying goes, poor couples mourn everything. I also agree that all spirits are based on material foundations, and no matter how similar values are, they cannot be worthless. If it's for your own happiness, it's better to break up with him.
I don't recommend those moral kidnapping behaviors, such as sharing weal and woe, starting a business together, interdependence, etc. Even if you are married, you can still divorce him without any reason, happiness is in your own hands, and freedom is the same, but divorce comes at a price.
Finally, I will say this poor man, if you can only see poverty in him and no hope, either he is too incompetent, or you are too snobbish. Whatever the reason, since you are hesitant to break up, I suggest that you break up first, at least you won't look for a poorer one.
As for whether you will regret it later, it depends on whether this poor man fights or not. None of this matters, because you are going to start a new relationship, and the good and the bad will not be in your hands.
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It doesn't matter if a man doesn't have money, look at him if he doesn't work hard, don't bully the young man to be poor, but you, a man, can't see how hard he works, and he doesn't even want to study, and his shortcomings are obvious and he doesn't know it. And your conditions are very good, you can estimate what kind of husband you can find within the normal range with your conditions, and what life with such a husband will be like.
On the other hand, if you marry him with enthusiasm after getting along for half a year, then think about what kind of life he can give you, even if you have all the materials after marriage, even if you can do food and clothing, but what to do with psychological boredom and grievances, as well as your guilt towards your parents, they will also worry about you.
In fact, the feelings of the right people are more matched, without the excessive sensitivity brought by anger and self-esteem, without the consumption friction of material concepts, there is no need to be careful to observe words and looks, the three views of the two sides are similar and actually equivalent, and it is not possible to compare who has been whom, who let whom, and the rest of the energy is just to talk about love and everyone is happy. This kind of love is pure.
Personally, I prioritize myself, in terms of family, my parents will not agree to me marrying his family is far away and poor, and in terms of money, I want to get married and have a house to settle down. His father doesn't worry about it, he doesn't think about his future, and his sister can't help him, he works for three days to fish and dry nets for two days, and his work is unstable.
Pick and choose, I can't stay here or there, the boss here is not good, the company there doesn't want people, don't give money, this year, basically I raised him, with the money my brother gave me, and the money I earned myself to spend on two people.
My family is also rural, the family is very bad, I do this, I really feel sorry for them, I feel very guilty, but I have no savings, and I can't help the family, I have persevered for so long, and after saying so much, I really thought about breaking up many times, but I felt reluctant, I didn't feel sorry for him, and even wasted more than two years of youth on him.
He has no dreams, no stable job, will scold me, will murder me, and will be good to me, but really we can't get by, who can understand the pain of no money, since being with him, I feel tired every day, I feel a lot older all of a sudden.
I think there are a few girls like me who live so tired, and no one tells me about being wronged every day. So it's better to find a boyfriend who has financial means.
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If your boyfriend is poor, but he is talented and self-motivated, then it is recommended that you do not break up, because with his talent and self-motivation, he will definitely give you the life you want.
Faced with the question of whether to break up with a poor boyfriend, different people naturally have different choices. Some people are full of love and feel that as long as two people love each other, everything is naturally OK; There are also some people who would rather cry in a BMW, or laugh on a bicycle, as long as they have money; Of course, the above two ideas are more extreme, and more people may be more rational, and feel that the focus still depends on the boyfriend's personality, ability to deal with people, ability to work, whether he is self-motivated, etc.
People are not poor, even if the boyfriend's family is very poor, but as long as he is self-motivated and not poor in thought, why break up? When you were together, you should have learned a little about his family, since you chose to be together, it was definitely not because of his family reasons, but because of his personal charm that attracted you.
People can find a job to make up for poverty, after all, they were born without a golden spoon, and the poverty of your parents is not something you can change, but parents are working hard for their children, so it is not terrible. Only a small part of the rich are rich, most of the family is not rich, and the criterion for a girl to choose a mate is not to see whether his family is poor or rich, but to see whether the person is self-motivated and promising. Poverty is only temporary, not a lifetime, and it is good to cherish when you meet a true hobby.
Because your boyfriend is poor, you are struggling with whether you should break up, at this time, it is recommended that you think carefully about what is the purpose when you choose to get along with each other at the beginning, if you simply want to find someone to rely on, want to find an economic support, but after contact, you find that your expectations are not met, in this case, personal advice can be broken up, after all, when you are together, your purpose is not pure, and you do not have a good view of love, such love will be separated sooner or later.
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Don't break up.
Whether to break up or not, you need to make a judgment: whether this man is worth your follow. How valuable is this man.
Does this man really want to give you happiness. To measure a person's worth, we can start from multiple dimensions, from the dimension of money alone, what we need to measure is whether he will continue to be poor.
Especially for recent college graduates, when they first graduate, everyone is very poor, and it is difficult to become rich without a few years of precipitation. There are many big bosses and business executives who have had successful careers and have experienced poverty. A lot of stupid women stay with them in the first two years of graduation and then give up in the third year, but often when you work for three years is when the income starts to explode, it's like digging a well, the well is about to come out, and then you dig another well.
And people are different from wells, no matter how well is dug in some wells, there will really be no water in the ground, but people are different, as long as this person is self-motivated, has been working hard, has been working very hard, digging the well of work, his life will not be bad all the time, it will slowly get better, you have to give him a little confidence, but also give yourself a little confidence in love. How many people's love is lost to the word "persistence".
I had a boyfriend in college, and we had just graduated and we didn't have much money. But he is very good and loves me very much, and we support each other and encourage each other. Later, he finally had a successful career, but we also broke up.
In this world, there are destined to be some people who can share weal and woe, but they cannot share wealth and prosperity. Although we didn't end up together, I'm glad that I was the one who was there for him when he was at his most depressed and discouraged.
If you have a boyfriend who is very poor but is very good to you, please cherish him. Because poverty is only temporary, how can you guarantee that he will not become rich in the future.
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There is no way to decide a person's original family, so he cannot be deprived of the right to marry because he is poor. If your boyfriend loves you very much and treats you very well, then no matter how poor he is, he will be self-motivated and work hard to earn money for you, because he will definitely not want you to live a hard life with him.
On the other hand, if you marry a rich husband, but he doesn't care about you, then even if you have a lot of money in your hand, you will eventually miss something.
I still remember watching a TV series before, starring Rene Liu. She is a native of Beijing, and her family conditions are relatively superior, but she married a Phoenix man from the countryside despite the resistance of her parents. Because the difference between the two family concepts is too great, two people who love each other after marriage gradually have a lot of contradictions, and finally end in divorce.
Marriage is not only a matter of two people, but also a matter of two families, if the concepts of the two families are too different, then your small family will also be affected in the future.
So, before marrying him, you have to think about what your boyfriend is, how poor is he? Is it spiritual or material?
Does the past matter? The past doesn't matter! It really doesn't matter! >>>More
I understand you very well Because I also came from that time In fact, the key to this matter depends on how deep the relationship between the two of you is Whether you plan to live together sincerely First of all, put aside the opinions of your parents, relatives, and friends No matter how difficult it is, even if you have nothing, are you willing to go on like this with him, then change positions, is he willing to die with you If both of you are willing, then you can try to convince your parents to look at your own conditions first, not very good, the job is not stable, and no one wants to find a husband who has no money and no house But if you find someone who has money and a house, will he be able to look down on you Even if he really feels sorry for you When two people are angry (there is no husband and wife who don't quarrel) he says that this one is not as good as him and that is not as good as him Will you be happy in your heart But people are telling the truth People are not born poor all their lives If you really love each other, go and persuade your parents and then work hard together for the future You are still young Success will not be far from you (when I married my husband, I didn't even have money to take a wedding photo, my mother's conditions were not very good, and I didn't hire anything.) But now we're not doing well.)
It should be that he is afraid, such a boy should also be a person who has been hurt in his relationship. Be optimistic, he should be a responsible person, my boyfriend is the same, we have been together for almost a year, and I haven't made any promises to me again, and we don't talk about the future, because he always says that no one knows what will happen in the future, in fact, such boys are very lonely in their hearts, they need a girl to be able to enter their hearts, but their protective psychology will also be strengthened, such boys, maybe think about what they say in the literal sense, seemingly without a sense of responsibility, In fact, it is precisely because they want to be responsible for us, so they say this. You can consider whether he is a responsible person from the small details he usually takes care of you, instead of being entangled in whether he gives you promises, feelings come from life, and a man who can live is a good man. >>>More
If it's just when you're frugal in life, it's right, after all, "money is earned when it's money" is just poisonous chicken soup, most people's salaries are fixed, it's really hard to keep money if you don't save money, if he is to save money and get married, be considerate of him. >>>More
I'm in the same situation as you now, but your boyfriend has been to your house, and I haven't been there, because her parents think I don't have a stable job and house, and I'm also struggling now, but I'll give you a suggestion, continue to talk with your boyfriend, everything takes time to solve, after a long time, your parents will slowly understand and soften, and then they will agree with you naturally, it's not easy for two people to be together, life is only a few decades in the world, It's not easy to find what you really like in the vast sea of people, don't give up, come on.