The dangers of spoiling children, what are the dangers of spoiling children

What are the serious consequences of spoiling children?

The tendency of self-centeredness is serious, only pursuing self-satisfaction, treating others without sincerity, not distinguishing between right and wrong, and lacking a sense of responsibility. It is easy to lose the ability to be independent, the ability to deal with setbacks is poor, the slightest disappointment will lose the courage to live, and it is easy to form bad habits.

1.Egocentric tendencies.

Some parents think that they have given all their love to their children, and that their children have been satisfied with love and do not need to socialize with their peers; Some parents love their children so much that when their children are wronged in their interactions with their peers, they indiscriminately step forward to protect them without understanding the reason. For a long time, the children who have been educated only pursue the satisfaction of their own perception, lack sincerity, rarely consider the feelings of others, cannot distinguish between right and wrong, and lack a sense of responsibility.

2.Loss of independence.

Surveys have shown that children from doting families are more likely to develop sensory integration disorder than children from strict and democratic families. Because caregivers (parents, grandparents or maternal grandparents) are overly doting and protective, they are always afraid that the child will be injured or bullied, and they will be protected for a long time, depriving all children of the opportunity to be independent, and in the long run, the child will lose the ability to be independent.

3.Poor frustration tolerance.

Whatever the child asks, parents will immediately meet the child's needs, which will make the child feel that everything is easy to get and lack the experience of struggling for life. In addition, some parents mistakenly think that as long as they create the best conditions for their children and spend tens of thousands of yuan to enter a good school, they can become talents. Long-term indulgence leads to poor frustration tolerance in children.

A little bit of life can cause big fluctuations, and a little setback will lose the courage to live and the desire to improve and develop yourself.

4.Forming bad habits.

Some parents spoil their children too much, and they are used to their children by their children's temperament. Only the child likes to go with him. For example:

When eating, the child does not eat, uses snacks to serve as a substitute meal, and the parents do not stop him much, always getting used to him. Long-term indulgence leads to the formation of bad habits in the child.

5.It is not conducive to the normal conduct of school education.

When children who have developed moral defects due to doting enter kindergarten, they are often criticized by teachers because they cannot be willful and do whatever they want as they are at home, so they turn to seeking help from their parents. Spoiling parents are generally very disgusted by criticism from others, and constantly find more excuses for their own doting behavior in order to achieve psychological balance, which makes it difficult for teachers to persuade and educate effectively. In the long run, the baby's growth and character formation are harmful and not beneficial.

1. Dote makes the child have no love in his heart Everyone knows that our only child, from the day he was born, attracted the attention of the whole family. Because he is an only child, he will receive attention in all aspects. If we want to use a drawing to represent it, then the arrows on the picture are all pointing to the child, this is the love of the adults around him for the child, and he is surrounded by this doting all day long.

In this case, there is no love in our children's hearts. What does this mean? That is to say, he only accepts love, but does not know how to give love, he receives love from all sides every day, and cannot love others.

Generally speaking, for him to truly love others, he must first establish a connection with others, and then he can generate love for others.

2. Spoiling confuses children's valuesWe found that children who grow up in a doting environment have some confused values in their brains. All children will have to go out into society, if a child grows up in a doting environment, he will not receive the influence of that correct values, then he will go to society, there will be a series of problems. Because he has been living in a doting environment, he can do whatever he wants, and then he will feel that he doesn't need these right values, he will feel that he can be satisfied, and even his mind will be stuck in that feeling.

Such a child is in a state of confusion about many issues, such as questions of principle and values. This is all the result of doting on children.

3. Doting makes children incapacitatedOur parents want their children to have the ability to learn and have excellent grades; I also hope that my children have self-confidence and can do things up to the sky. All parents think like this, but we dote on our children, and the result of such education leads to children's low ability. Spoiling degrades the child's abilities in all aspects.

4. Spoiling makes children disgusted with learning Because we dote on children, many of the children's abilities are covered, so that he cannot develop. Once this kind of low-ability child is put into study and life, he will encounter many problems. Such a child will encounter many obstacles in learning, which means that he is frustrated in every aspect of learning, so the child does not like to study, and finally gets tired of school, or even drops out of school.

In our room, we can observe this kind of child very well, when their academic performance declines, and then other problems appear, because his motivation to learn is limited by the doting of our parents. It is very obvious that children who are tired of school almost always grow up in doting, and we need to know this.

1. Special treatment: The status of the child in the family is superior, and special care is given everywhere, such as eating "alone", and good food is placed in front of him for him to enjoy alone; To be an "only child", grandparents can not celebrate birthdays, and children have to buy big cakes and give gifts ...... birthdaysSuch children feel special and accustomed to being superior to others, and will inevitably become selfish, unsympathetic, and will not care about others.

Second, the child will give whatever he wants. Some parents also give a lot of pocket money to young children and elementary school students, and the satisfaction of their children is easier. Such children will inevitably develop a bad character of not valuing things, paying attention to material comforts, wasting money, and being inconsiderate of others, and will have no patience and the spirit of enduring hardship.

3. Lazy life allows children to eat, live, play and study irregularly, do what they want, sleep lazy, skip meals, wander during the day, watch TV late at night, etc. When such a child grows up, he lacks self-motivation and curiosity, and he can get by.

Fourth, pray for the central government, for example, begging the child to eat and sleep while coaxing, and promise to tell the child 3 stories before finishing the meal. The child's psychology is that the more you beg him, the more he will behave in a twisted manner, not only will he not be able to distinguish between right and wrong, he will not be able to cultivate a sense of responsibility and a down-to-earth and generous character, but also the prestige of education will be lost.

Fifth, instead of such children, they do not do any housework, do not understand the pleasure of labor and the responsibility of helping parents reduce their burden, and will become lazy and selfish.

Sixth, the fuss is originally "newborn calves are not afraid of tigers", children are not afraid of water, not afraid of the dark, not afraid of wrestling, not afraid of illness. After wrestling, they often get up quietly and continue to play. Later, why did some children be timid and cry?

It is often caused by parents and grandparents, and the child panics when he or she is sick, and the end result of pampering is that the child does not let the parents take a step. These children are branded as cowardice.

Almost every parent loves their child, but many parents can't grasp the degree of love. So when the love is too much, it becomes "doting".

1. Behind the "sense of superiority" is the manifestation of selfishness. Parents who dot on their children will give their children "special treatment" in all aspects. On the one hand, it may be the reason for the only child, and on the other hand, it may also be the idea of "preference for sons".

Children in this environment will have a sense of superiority in the small environment of "home", so much so that they will become "pampered and arrogant", and become selfish and unsympathetic.

When they leave their families or go out into society, they will enjoy being cared for and end up not caring about others. This kind of selfishness can make it difficult for them to get along with others. And the source of children's selfishness is actually the doting of parents.

2. Behind the "responsiveness" is the performance of material. Many parents always meet the various requirements of their children without principle, and there are generally two reasons for supporting parents to make these behaviors: one is that they think that "no matter how poor they are, they can't be poor children", so they will try their best to meet the requirements of their children; The second is that many parents feel that "I wanted to be unconditional when I was a child", so they can't bear to see their children like they did when they were young.

Children who grow up like this usually behave as "materialistic". This kind of doting will make the child lack patience and the spirit of hardship. Once they are away from their parents, they hardly know how to survive.

3. Behind the "overprotectiveness" is a manifestation of cowardice. Parents give their children enough protection on the grounds of "safety", but some parents are "too protective" of their children, not allowing them to go out, not allowing them to play with other children, and so on. It's like the one we know well:

If you put it in your mouth, you are afraid of melting, and when you spit it out, you are afraid of flying. "People can only become serious after experiencing something, and if they don't go through the hardships and hardships, then they will never really grow up. Children who grow up in an environment of "absolute safety" will inevitably become timid and incompetent in the future, and will also develop a strong sense of dependence.

Now we often call "mom bao man", most of them grew up like this. On the surface, it seems to be a kind of "obedience", but it is actually a sign of cowardice.

Generally, spoiling children, when they grow up, they will not only lack the concept of right and wrong, but even easily cause distortion of values. Lack of a sense of right and wrong in their words and deeds. Because they don't realize that their actions are problematic.

Over-spoiling can have the following effects on children:

1. Self-centered tendency: Children who grow up in an overly doting environment are prone to self-centeredness, rarely consider the feelings of others, only pursue self-satisfaction, and lack sincerity and responsibility towards others, resulting in a selfish and selfish character.

2. Poor independence: Children who are overly spoiled will have poor independence and autonomy due to long-term overprotection.

3. Arrogant personality: Spoiling children too much will make children not know how to be tolerant and tolerant, will not respect their parents, and will not be polite to other elders.

4. Poor frustration resistance: because they have been spoiled for a long time, some children will be more cowardly, and when they encounter difficulties, they will rely on their parents to solve them, and they will not be able to bear setbacks and difficulties, and they will lose the courage to live and improve their desire to develop themselves if they are not in order.

5. Develop bad habits: Parents' excessive spoiling will lead to the development of bad habits by the child's temperament and habitual children, and long-term indulgence will lead to the development of bad habits by children.

1. Spoiling will make children self-centered and will not take into account the feelings of others.

Children who grow up with doting parents are often very self-conscious, do not consider the ideas of others, and do not listen to the opinions of others. So there is no organizational discipline, no team spirit. In this way, in life, they will feel lonely, form a withdrawn character, sometimes self-shackles, unwilling to contact society, produce melancholy emotions, and even suffer from depression.

Second, children will demand too much from others in life and take it for granted.

Because under the doting of parents, children's requirements are often met, so in society, he often feels that others should let him and do what he wants. Such behavior will naturally make him unsociable and unpopular.

3. Selfishness and egoism will be ingrained in the child's mind.

Once the other party can't meet their own requirements, they will lose control of their emotions, complain, anger, vicious persecution, nonsense, and even fight and do things out of line.

Make the child selfish and self-righteous.

Makes the child lose the ability to be independent.

There is no respect for the elders, no big or small, and they don't know etiquette.

Character is delicate and willful.

Over-indulgence can cause the following harms to children:

1. Selfish tendency: Children who grow up in an overly doting environment are prone to self-centeredness, rarely consider the feelings of others, only pursue self-satisfaction, and lack sincerity and responsibility towards others, resulting in a selfish character.

2. Poor independence: Children who are over-spoiled will have low independence due to long-term overprotection.

3. Arrogant personality: Excessive spoiling of children will make children do things without knowing how to be tolerant and tolerant, disrespecting their parents, and being impolite to other elders.

4. Poor tolerance: Because children have been spoiled for a long time, some children will become more cowardly, and when they encounter difficulties, they will rely on their parents to solve them, and they will not be able to bear setbacks and difficulties, and they will not be willing to give up the courage of life and the desire to improve their own development.

5. Cultivate bad habits: Excessive spoiling by parents will be indulged by children and accustomed to children, which will lead to bad habits in children over time.

Nowadays, parents are almost more doting on their children.

Everyone thinks that if you give your child more love, your child will be able to get more and better resources everywhere. This is the reason why many children have an unusually domineering personality, and it is also the reason why the social atmosphere has deteriorated and people are psychologically numb.

The parents who carry the schoolbag on behalf of the person mentioned in the question are only considered to be a form of doting. Even more poisonous than this is the thinking imposed by coddling.

Many parents always think that they have suffered losses everywhere, so they want their children not to suffer losses or even take advantage of them. Instill wrong thinking at all costs. For example, the child has made a big mistake, but he finds shortcomings in the injured party, so that the child mistakenly thinks that he has done a good job and never reflects on the wrong behavior; For example, instilling crooked thinking, using improper means to plunder public resources that should be fair; For example, teaching children to absorb other people's funds in the name of their children and be greedy for money; For example, indulging in children's violent personality and instilling the thinking that violence will not suffer; For example, instilling a dark perspective on life and misunderstanding the well-intentioned ...... of others

Therefore, parents who do not control their behavior and spoil their children excessively are just seeking an outlet for their dark side and evil thoughts.

Therefore, the essence of doting is not love at all, but just the evil thoughts of letting children charge on behalf of their parents.

Knowing that you can't do it, but letting your child do it, this is the biggest harm of spoiling to children.

Spoiled children do seem to be able to take advantage of some small areas. But Heaven is fair, and what awaits is a terrible and inhuman environment. The "wolf entrepreneurial spirit" that some people have advocated before is somewhat similar to spoiled children.

Civilization begins with every tiny word or deed. Human civilization is the guide to human behavior.