How to skillfully dredge children s emotions and further education?

We all have emotions, and when we do, it's important how we deal with them. Many illnesses are the result of a long-term emotional backlog, so it is important to help children channel their emotions and teach them the ability to deal with their emotions. It can not only develop children's emotional intelligence, but also benefit children's physical and mental growth.

So how can we help children channel their emotions and develop their ability to deal with their own emotions? First, we need to recognize emotions. Many people often can't tell the difference between emotions and behaviors, and they are always confused.

Emotions are often adjectives of feelings, such as irritability, anxiety, helplessness, pleasure, happiness, etc., at the same time, emotions are not good or bad, each is our real emotion, even those so-called negative emotions, there are positive motives. So, when we have negative emotions, we don't suppress them, but express them in an appropriate way, and at the same time see the unmet needs behind those emotions. We need to teach children to recognize their own emotions, for example, when a child cries because a toy is broken, we can say to the child, "Mommy can see that you are sad now because your favorite toy is broken".

Let your child identify his emotions by speaking them so that he or she can express them the next time. When children have emotions, it is important for them to encourage them to express their emotions instead of crying. You can show your child some picture books about emotions, such as "When Emotions Knock on the Door", to help children recognize emotions.

Second, accept your child's emotions. No matter what kind of emotions our children have, we must accept them and respect them. Empathizing with your child will make your child feel supported and understood, which can be a good way to channel your child's emotions.

Many times we will find that when we empathize with our children, their crying will gradually subside.

Finally, we can do an emotional choice wheel with our child. When a child has emotions, we can let him see what ways can make him feel better, of course, these ways are neither hurtful to others nor himself, and at the same time can find an outlet for the child's emotions. For example, a positive pause can help children do something they enjoy to help calm them down.

When the child is emotional, we should help the child to channel, instead of blindly suppressing, scolding them, and telling them not to cry, which may cause trauma to the child and will also have an impact on the child's future life.

There are positive and negative emotions that we usually know. When our children have negative emotions, parents should first understand what are the reasons for their children's negative emotions? In what ways should we guide our children to sort out their negative emotions?

To help children resolve negative psychological emotions, we can try to do the following?

Accept your child's emotions

We all know that both adults and we will have emotions, I have not eaten enough, I have not slept well, etc., will lead to the emergence of emotions, not to mention a child has negative emotions, at this time our acceptance and recognition of children's emotions will make children more secure.

Empathize with your child

Empathy is to understand and accept children from their point of view. "Baby, you're so unhappy today because your mother woke you up and went to school before you woke up today, right? "So you're upset, aren't you?

When parents put themselves in their child's shoes and understand and accept their child's negative emotions, they will know that there is a reason for their child's crying.

3. Spend a lot of time with your children.

When the child has a tantrum and emotions, give her time and space to vent, and in this process, parents can silently stay by the child's side to comfort her.

When negative emotions come, parents need to guide them, and children find ways to deal with and deal with negative emotions, drive away negative emotions, and start a relaxed and happy parenting.

If you want to learn more about parenting, please pay attention to "Mi Ma Talks about Parenting", I am Wei Hua, also Mi Ma, is a practical parent-child education expert, child learning ability improvement research expert, author of parenting books: "Shhh

Don't look at the child, he already knows how to think, has his own ideas, and sometimes he will lose his temper and make emotions because of some things, which will make his parents very anxious and don't know what to do.

There is a baby who is five years old this year, and his mother wants a second child, when his mother is seven months pregnant, one day, Dabao suddenly cried, lying in his mother's arms and saying: "Mom, since you gave birth to Erbao, you don't love me"?

Mom was shocked when she heard it, and suddenly felt that something was wrong with Dabao, but Mom didn't show it, but smiled and hugged Dabao, kissed his face and said, "Dabao, do you think you are boring when you play alone, do you feel lonely?"

Dabao nodded, "Wait until Erbao comes to play with you and be your companion," Dabao stopped crying.

Mom said again: "With Erbao, Erbao also loves you, Mom and Dad love you two, you also love Erbao, we are a family, so we must love each other." Dabao burst into tears and laughed, and happily went to play.

When the child has emotions, parents should not be affected by the child's emotions, but should comfort him first, so that he knows that love must learn to share, learn to love and be loved. Instill in him more good side, and the child will not be cranky.

01 Teach children to vent reasonably.

When children are emotional, parents should teach their children to vent reasonably, just like we need catharsis when we are in a bad mood, but the way of catharsis is not too different.

Parents can tell their children how to vent their emotions, such as: crying, or communicating with others, or they can exercise to let their emotions vent during exercise, and negative emotions need to be evacuated and not held back, which is not conducive to children's physical and mental health.

02 Distract your child.

When parents encounter children who can't control their emotions, they should try to divert their children's attention and guide the topic to the events that the child is interested in, such as: how does the protagonist in the story he (she) are interested in behave after encountering such a thing, so that the child can learn from the role model, learn to control his emotions, and gradually grow up.

03 Communication.

After the child is unable to control his emotions, we should wait for the child to calm down and talk to the child about the cause of the emotion.

Try to communicate with the baby in a language that the child can understand, so that the baby understands what the consequences of this are, what the results will be, and let the baby choose the result independently, which will help the baby establish good communication habits.

04 Correctly recognize and value children's emotions.

Parents must pay attention to their children's emotions in order to have a correct understanding of their children's emotions. Let your baby understand that emotions are not cathartic, but that they need to find the right and effective way to transform them into positive emotions.

5. Teach children some small ways to control their emotions.

When children are not able to control their emotions, parents should teach children how to control their emotions.

Parents should teach their children to take deep breaths, or to stay in a quiet place for a while, or to count the numbers themselves, and wait for their emotions to calm down before solving the problems they are facing.

In fact, the way to solve children's bad emotions and help children control their emotions can be solved through emotional picture books. Through my experiments, I have shown that emotional picture books can indeed teach children some effective ways to manage emotions. Not only can you use it yourself, but you can also use it for others.

But the premise is to choose your own picture book. Only when children feel that picture books can resonate with them, will they be willing to read such picture books and be willing to "listen" to the content of picture books.

Sometimes, the descriptions in picture books are very useful to us adults. For example, there is a passage in "My Feeling Series: I'm Sad" that describes children like this:

It's normal to be sad, but when I'm sad, there are still many ways to make myself feel better. I can tell people I'm sad. They'll say, "You are ok, you'll be fine."

And sitting next to me, when I'm sad, I can do it to them, and I feel a lot better."

After reading this passage, in fact, sometimes parents can also discuss with their children: see what other ways can be used to face sadness. For example, when the baby says:"Mom I'm sad, hug". Because hugs can give love and strength.

When the baby receives a loving hug, he will feel less sad. Then, kiss the child gently, or let the child lie on our lap, etc.