Please send me the joke you think is the funniest and most classic, thank you

One day, a little white rabbit came to a shop and asked the owner, "Boss, are there any carrots?" The boss shook his head: "No." After hearing this, the little white rabbit ran away with a "whoosh".

The next day, the little white rabbit came to the store again and asked, "Boss, are there any carrots?" The boss shook his head angrily: "No." After hearing this, the little white rabbit ran away with a "whoosh".

On the third day, the little white rabbit came to the store again and asked, "Boss, do you have any carrots?" The boss angrily shouted, "No, no! Ask me again and I'll pull your teeth out with pliers! After hearing this, the little white rabbit ran away with a "whoosh".

On the fourth day, the little white rabbit came to the store again and timidly asked, "Boss, do you have pliers?" The boss said, "No." The white rabbit then asked, "Are there any carrots?" Nope.

I know how many days have passed, a little black rabbit came to the store and asked the owner: "Boss, are there any carrots?" The boss shook his head angrily: "No." After hearing this, the little black rabbit "swished" and ran away.

The next day, the little black rabbit came to the store again and asked, "Boss, do you have any carrots?" The boss was very angry: "No, no, no! Ask me again and I'll pull your teeth out with pliers! After hearing this, the little black rabbit "swished" and ran away.

On the third day, the little black rabbit came to the store again and asked timidly, "Boss, do you have pliers?" The boss said angrily

No. The little black rabbit then asked, "Are there any carrots?"

The boss was furious, grabbed the little black rabbit, took out a small hammer, and knocked out the little black rabbit's teeth.

On the fourth day, the little black rabbit came to the store again and asked vaguely, "Boss, is there carrot juice?" ”

Classic joke: play from memory.

Song's eyes are highly myopic and he wears glasses as thick as the bottom of a beer bottle, but he often likes to get into trouble.

One day, he came home with a swollen nose and no glasses on his nose, and his grandmother hurriedly asked, "What's going on?" ”

I got into a fight. ”

What about glasses? "It's in the bag. ”

If you don't wear glasses, how can you fight with others? ”

That's right, before I fight, I take a good look at my opponent, then take off my glasses and fight from memory! ”

Five Students Became Addicted to Smoking One day, he was smoking in the toilet and was seen by the head teacher, who told his head teacher that the head teacher talked to the five of them the next day.

Teacher: "Do you smoke?" ”

Student A: "Suck ......."”

Teacher: "Suck?" You're glorious! Go home and call your parents! "I was also beaten and demerited.

When Student A went back, he said to the other four, "When the teacher asks you if you smoke, you don't admit it, you don't even admit it, you don't smoke, I'll take care of it myself."

After a while. Teacher: "Do you smoke?" ”

Student B: "No. ”

Then eat a french fries bureau shouting chop. As he spoke, the teacher handed over the fries.

Student B naturally stretched out two fingers ......

Teacher: "Don't suck?" Go home and call your parents! ”

Teacher: "Do you smoke?" ”

Student C: "Don't suck." ”

Let's have a french fries. ”

Student C carefully took the fries and was secretly grateful to Student B (fortunately, he had been prepared).

Teacher: "Why don't you dip some ketchup?" ”

Student C didn't pay attention to dipping the sauce too much and began to flick ...... into the bowlTeacher: "Don't suck?" Soot is very skillful, ......Call the parents! ”

Teacher: "Do you smoke?" ”

Student D: "No......Suck ......”

Student D was already sweating after eating the fries and felt like walking on thin ice).

Student D: "Thank you......Teacher ......If it's okay, I'll go back first. ”

Teacher: "Won't you bring a root for your classmates to eat?" ”

Student D: "Thank you, teacher. He put the fries to his ear ......Teacher: "You know what I'm supposed to say, don't call the parents."

Teacher: "Do you smoke?" ”

Student E: "Don't suck".

I finally put the fries in my pocket ...... safely）

Student E turned around and wanted to leave, but the teacher suddenly shouted, "The principal is here!" ”

I saw that student E hurriedly took the fries out of his pocket and put them on the ground, and stepped on ...... vigorously

What animals can be attached to the wall? Answer: Seals.

The phrase "Japanese are human" belongs to: a metaphor b exaggeration c borrowing danthropomorphism.

Poop and pee are good brothers. One day, I was hit by a car while crossing the road, and I said, "I want to poop."

One day, Cao Cao and Liu Bei cooked wine and talked about heroes. Outside, there were dark clouds, lightning and thunder, wind and rain. The two drank a few glasses, and Liu Bei suddenly let out a fart, very embarrassed.

Liu Bei was embarrassed, only to hear Guan Yu behind him say calmly: "Don't be surprised, the fart comes from the feather (rain)!" ”

As soon as Guan Yu's voice fell, Zhao Yun on the side took a step forward and said, "Don't be surprised, farts come from the clouds!" ”

As soon as Zhao Yun finished speaking, Zhang Fei, who had a loud voice, then shouted: "The fart is flying!" ”

Everyone burst into laughter. Liu Bei has also returned to normal.

Cao Cao didn't laugh, he was deeply touched by this matter. After sending Liu Bei and the others away, Cao Cao said to his subordinates: "Liu Bei's subordinates, when they saw that the lord had a mistake, they all rushed to take responsibility and make up for their mistakes, which can really be described as loyal. If it's your turn, will it be possible? ”

Everyone was indignant and said in unison: "Prime Minister, isn't it just a, what's so difficult about this!" You'll see next time. ”

A few days later, Cao Cao invited Liu Bei to drink again, and during the banquet he wanted to fart to see how his subordinates reacted. After holding it for a long time, I finally held back a little fart. Everyone had been waiting for a long time, and when they heard the sound of "goo", the general Xu Chu was anxious, and hurriedly shouted first:

The fart was put by Chu (pig)! ”

Wang Lang followed closely and said: "The fart was put by Lang (wolf)!" ”

Gou An said: This is Gou (dog) fart.

Cai Mao said: This is a Mao (cat) fart.

Cao Cao's eyes widened when he heard this, and the others thought that Cao Cao thought he was slow, so they rushed to him.

Niu Jin said: "This is a golden fart!" ”

Xun Yu said: "This is Yu (jade) fart!" ”

Cao Hong said: "The fart is Hong (red)!" ”

Gao Ran said: "The fart is Lan (blue)!" ”

Jiang Gan said: "The fart is dry!" ”

Sima Shi said: "The fart is Shi (wet)!" ”

Xiahou Yuan said: "The fart is Yuan (round)!" ”

Cao Fang said: "The fart is square! ”

He is worthy of being my No. 1 military advisor. Cao Cao thought secretly. Let's hear what he has to say.

I only heard Guo Jia say: "This is Jia (fake) fart!" ”

Cao Zhen grabbed again: "This is a real fart!" ”

Guo Huai said: "This is Huai (bad) fart!" ”

Zhang He said: "The fart is (drinking)!" ”

Sima Yan said: "The fart is Yan (pharyngeal)!" ”

Xu Huang said: "The fart is dangling!" ”

Xiahou Dun said: "The fart is Dun (jumping)!" ”

Guo Tu said: "The fart is (spit out)!"

Xiahou Ba said: "The fart is out of the tyrant".

Xun You said: "The fart is from You! ”

Full pet said: "The fart is a pet (rush)!" ”

Jiang Ji said: "The fart is squeezed (squeezed)!" ”

Zhong Xuan said: "The fart is from the fart (shake)!" ”

Finally, Cao Cao couldn't hold back any longer, and said angrily: "Nonsense, farts are out." ”

Liu Bei and the others were already smiling.

Police: What the hell, wandering the streets so late!

Miss: Prostitute!

The police were in awe and worshipped!

Police: Which newspaper is it?

Miss: Late hugs!

Police: Which evening newspaper?

Miss: Hug the man at night!

Police: Henan Evening News is good!

Miss: This is something that can only be done at night!

Police: It's really hard to rush the manuscript at night! Pay more attention to your body!

Police: Okay. Manuscript by all means! Manuscript by all means!

A student climbed over a wall to enter the school and was caught by the principal.

Principal: Why don't you go through the school gates?

The student pointed to the clothes: Metersbonwe, don't take the usual path!

Headmaster: How did you climb over such a high wall?

The student patted his pants: Li Ning, everything is possible!

Principal: How does it feel to climb over the wall?

The student points to the shoe: Xtep, the feeling of flying!

The next day, the students came in through the front door.

Principal: Why didn't you climb over the wall today?

The student pointed to the shoes: ANTA, I choose what I like!

Principal: Why aren't you wearing a school uniform?

The student lifted his pants: Semar, you can wear whatever you want.

Principal: Aren't you afraid that I won't let you into the school?

The student patted the clothes on his body: the noble bird, no one can stop it.

The principal was furious: I want to make a big mistake for you!

Student Dissatisfaction: Why?

The principal sneered: Dynamic Zone, I am in charge of my territory!