How to tactfully tell someone that you don t fit in?

The most tactful way is to distance yourself from them and tell them with the most authentic actions - you are not social. It's not a shame to be unsociable, sometimes because of the disagreement of the three views, it is easy to cause misfit.

I once joined an Internet company, and the consumption concept of the people in that department was more unaccustomed to me, they were all there to apply for credit cards, online loans, all kinds of demolition of the east wall to make up the west wall, to the middle of the month, I asked my colleagues to borrow money, not even the money for breakfast. At the beginning, I would go out to eat with them, but then because of this situation, I slowly stayed away from them, because their consumption concept did not match mine, and I couldn't imagine that a person with a salary of only 5,000 yuan could buy clothes for two or three thousand yuan, four or five thousand yuan for various credit cards, and more than 1,000 lipsticks.

Although in their statement, this is a kind of advanced consumption, but in my thoughts, do they have some misunderstanding of advanced consumption? This is clearly a kind of behavior that does not recognize one's own spending power, commonly known as unclear. So, I slowly broke away from their group, slowly returned to my life, a perfect motion sickness as an excuse, I could completely avoid many of their activities, I picked myself up from them, and then had a better development, and left that company.

There is no need to say it if you don't fit in, and someone will naturally understand it when you make it, because being unsocial is a way of saying that you don't play with others, so there is no need to find something to do for yourself, and tell them specifically, as long as you alienate them, they will understand. After all, they are all adults who know how to analyze.

If you want to tell people tactfully, "I'm not social", as long as you don't talk to them, they will naturally feel it, and you don't need to say anything to know that you are not social.

Language can be divided into symbolic language and body language, and it is not necessary to say everything so that others can feel it. Sometimes a look, a movement, will also make people feel what you want to express.

For example, in the above photo taken by the actors after acting, some characters seem to be unsocial, such as the man in black played by Tony Leung, his eyes did not look at the camera, but looked into the distance with sharp eyes, and the expression on his face also looked more gloomy. Others are either looking at the camera or smiling. In such a comparison, who is gregarious and who is not gregarious, is naturally very obvious.

This is to use body language to show that you don't fit in. In the crowd, if there are individual people who leave the group and wander outside the group, regardless of whether the other party is small and transparent, they are basically unsociables. This is to show the psychological distance from others by narrowing the physical distance between each other through interpersonal distance.

Exhibit an unsociable attitude.

And there are some ways to tell others that you don't fit in, which is by giving advice and suggestions. Just like when all the adults say that the emperor's new clothes are very good-looking, the unsocial children say that the emperor has no clothes at all.

In real life, we often encounter occasions where we need to express our attitude, in addition to our attitude at work, there may be some more private and private topics, such as when talking about the gossip of colleagues, we take the initiative to withdraw from talking about it. Or when there is a group activity, it cannot be shirked for various reasons. In this way, visible and invisible, people will perceive you as unsociable.

This is to respond to the team's opinions with their own true attitude, so as to show their own unsociability.

Take Stephen Chow, for example, he is a very controversial person. Many actors who worked with him, even the "old man" (old partner) who did not become a "star master", did not have a very good evaluation of him, and even stopped working with him, and his emotions were broken.

In a sense, he was an unsociable person. He shows that he is not social, that is, he uses his true attitude to face the people around him. With a demanding and changeable directorial style, the actors are at a loss, because a shot may have to be repeated many times.

Use your own mind to control the whole team. Even, ignoring other people's opinions and attitudes ......

This method is not a tactful, but because of a strong personal attitude, it makes people feel intimidated and stop. But this thing is not social, because I don't want to deliberately have too many other people's opinions, I just want to respect my own true thoughts, even if it is tactful, in the eyes of others, it must be tough, so it is better to do it with your own ideas, and others will naturally know what kind of person they are.

What do you think? Do you want to follow other people's circles and become a part of them, or do you want to be your true self?

Sometimes I see others playing happily together, chatting very happily, chatting about all kinds of interesting things in the north and south, and I am very embarrassed in the corner, I don't know how to talk to them, what to talk about, how to tell others tactfully that you are not social, instead of being arrogant and arrogant and so on, let others misunderstand you, we need to learn slowly, neither let others hate you, but you don't have to find a way to chat with others to solve the embarrassment.

When you go out with your colleagues or classmates, you can tell them from time to time that you are more inward, don't like to talk much, and don't usually like to go out to play, so you don't know how to play, and I hope everyone can be tolerant and tolerant. If you've known each other for a long time, you know each other well, and they know what kind of person you are, then you don't care what they think of you.

For when you play or work together once, you will be unsociable for various reasons, you don't like a lot of people, more people means more opinions, and everyone has more differences, which will cause a lot of contradictions, and because you don't like a person, you don't like to do activities with everyone, maybe because some things affect your mood, some environmental influences, you can tell them in the process of getting along with them, you are in a bad mood, or your personality is a little weird, not very gregarious, I hope you understand, there is something offended, I hope you don't blame me, forgive me, let's be humble, everyone can understand each other.

Sometimes when you tell others something in a tactful way, you can also use a more direct method, you don't have to hide it, you can still achieve the same effect directly, and you can also make others feel that you are a more direct and refreshing person.

Tell that you have your own ideas that can be expressed, even if they are different from others, you don't need to be afraid of being isolated by others, you need your own grand opinions.

The difficulties and troubles in the world will always wipe out our original hearts and make our hearts dusty. You don't enjoy solitude, so it's easy to go with the flow. The higher the level, the more people like to be alone. Being good at solitude is a kind of wisdom and a state, and the more peaceful you are with your heart, the happier your life will be.

In today's society, in order to integrate into the so-called circle and the so-called gregarious, people force themselves to enter some circles that do not belong to them, so that they lose themselves and make themselves unable to see the truth of life. And those who seem to be out of place are diving in, focusing on themselves, doing what they want to do, and constantly improving themselves.

After reading those replies, it was really ...... sweatingIn particular, there is a drop of use value, speechless......

The landlord wants to make friends, but it also depends on what kind of friends you need. If you need a close friend, then you need to be anxious about what the person needs, and you must remember what she said, know how to communicate with each other, understand the beauty of distance, and don't consider the use value; If you just need a friend who drinks and meat, then it's simple, just do what he likes, just listen to what he says, don't take it seriously, just make an appearance to help when you need help, don't take it too seriously (serious is hurting yourself), and think more about the use value (don't help if you don't have the use value).

But no matter what kind of friends you make, you need to do the following:1Don't be too enthusiastic about helping others or treating others, people are cheap animals, if you are too enthusiastic, he will take it for granted, but he doesn't know how to be grateful, it's best if he asks you for help or don't mention it to him before or after you help; 2.

Eloquence, it is impossible for friends to just say that they are friends, there must be many common topics and common hobbies, of course, this aspect depends on you to exercise; 3.Don't be too stingy, be generous, although you may not have so much money, but you have to do your best, a very simple truth, you go to a well-off home to borrow 10w and a billionaire to borrow 100w The concept is different, if it is a friend, he will consider your situation, and people who do not consider your situation are not worthy of being your friend; 4.Remember that charcoal in the snow is always a hundred times stronger than icing on the cake; 5.

Although don't think too much about the use value, you must have some of the same experience or not far from each other in society, and a doctor can never be friends with an illiterate person for too long, so you have to work hard to improve yourself.

I think it's a matter of character, but also of the environment, of mood: be yourself and don't care what others say.

It's easy! Try to say hello to strangers first and have a chat. Why it's a stranger, because it doesn't matter if it's wrong.

Just to connect how to talk to people, after a long time, you will get used to talking to people, whether they are acquaintances or strangers. The more you talk to others, the more you will slowly gain experience and tell yourself what to say and what not to say. In this way, you will improve your language skills, and gradually everyone will think that you are kind, cute, and well-behaved.

There is a book, The Weakness of Human Nature, that I recommend to you.