Ask for a few funny text messages that can make girls laugh, with a little connotation, don t be too

1.After watching the Romance of the Three Kingdoms, the tiger went to catch a wild boar, and when he saw that there was no pig in the pig's nest, he touched his beard and said: Empty city plan! When he turned around, he saw a dead pig on the beast clip, and exclaimed: Bitter meat plan! Suddenly I saw you, and I was overjoyed: Ouch, there is also a beauty plan!

2.Smart women are not cute, women who are too stupid are not loved, capable women dare not love, beautiful women do not let love, the woman who received this text message is an exception, smart and beautiful and cuter!

3.Oh my God, it's too blue! Ocean! It's too salty! Life is too difficult! Work, too annoying! and you, fate; Miss you, insomnia; It's too hard to see you; Alas, what can I do! I think you can think of me, I can't eat chopsticks, I can't swallow the bowl!

A cow saw that the kangaroo had a bag, and was very envious, so she pressed one on her body and put her calf in it. I went home and asked her husband: Does my husband see any changes in me? My husband replied very well and learned to pretend calves.

Send you a text message, and then you can't see me, you can't see me,,, I hope you can be happy every day, and always love me to see you laugh.

The only thing I can do now is chopsticks.

Attachment +10% Missing +10% Jealousy +10% Suspicion +10% Sweetness.

10% distress + 10% happiness + 10% jealousy + 10% blush + 10% coquettishness.

100% love.

2.If you love me, you can kiss me, if you don't love me, I'll kiss you, okay

Reading this message, you owe me a hug; Delete this letter.

Breath, owe me a kiss; Save this information, owe me a date; Want.

It's a reply, you owe me everything; If you don't reply, you're me.

Target. 4,9.If there were only 10 minutes left in the world, I would reminisce with you about the ups and downs; If there were only 3 minutes left in the world, I would kiss you affectionately; If there was only 1 minute left in the world, I would say I love you 60 times.

1.The son did not study well and was scolded by his mother, and after being scolded, the son looked at his father with complaining eyes and said: Why did you marry her? Dad also said with a complaining look: It's not because of you!

A woman gets off the night shift, and a man follows in a bad way.

The woman was afraid, passed by the cemetery, and with an idea, she said to the grave"Daddy, I'm back, open the door.

The man fled in fear.

The woman was at peace and was about to leave, when suddenly a gloomy voice came from the grave, girl, did you forget to bring the key again?

The woman panicked and ran away.

A tomb robber came out of the grave and said, "Delay my work and scare you to death." ”

As soon as the words of tomb robbery fell, I found an old man next to him, who was carving a tombstone with a chisel, and asked curiously, and the old man said angrily: "They have carved my name wrong." ”

The great fear of robbing the tomb rushed away.

The old man sneered:"Dare to grab business with me, and be tender... As he was talking, the chisel accidentally fell to the ground, and the old man was about to pick it up, when he bent down and found that the chisel was held in one hand in the grass, the old man was surprised, and a voice said: "You are looking for death, change my house number!" ”

The old man rolled down the hill in fright, and a scavenger crawled out of the grass

Ay! It takes so much effort to make a piece of scrap metal these days. ”

A: How much do you earn a year?

B: 9 million.

A: There were 800,000 that month!

B: Yes, it's a base salary.

A: Yes, what do you do?

B: The ...... of dreaming

A girl was accidentally sliding, but the wound was small and didn't bleed much, and her boyfriend saw it. M: Why did you slip on your hand?

Why are you so careless, go, I'll take you to the doctor. F: It's just a small injury, there's no need to go to the hospital.

M: No, it hurts my heart if I cut it on your hand! Then I went to the hospital, and when the doctor saw it, he took a band-aid directly.

The man asked: How is it, doctor? Doctor:

If you're any later......Man: (The man says) That's it? Doctor:

It'll do it on its own.

1.Xiao Ming got a haircut, and when he came to school the next day, his classmates saw his new hairstyle and said with a smile: "Xiao Ming! Your hair is good for a kite! Xiao Ming felt very aggrieved, so he ran outside to cry. Crying and crying and flying!

2.The difference between classical and modern: In classical, a man kisses a woman at least after a hundred pages, and in modern **, there is already an illegitimate child on the second page. It can be seen that what society is pursuing now is "efficiency"!

3.A buddy wrote in the graduation guest book at the same table that the best brothers are: the brother who sleeps on the top bunk; The favorite person is: You at the same table: The most memorable thing: The brother who slept on the top bunk took you away from the tablemate.

4.Sometimes, when I was working on a language paper, I always wished I was a foreigner. And when I was doing the English papers, I felt like I had become Chinese again. And when I was working on the math papers, I suddenly realized that I was an alien.

5.You know? People who often say "good" are kind-hearted and often say "yes.""People who are bold in temperament and who often accept the advice of others are modest and courteous. I have a suggestion: I haven't seen you for a long time, come out for dinner, okay? You're in for a treat, is that okay?

6.My girlfriend asked me, "What gift do you give me for my birthday?" I smiled and pointed to the other side: "See that red Mercedes?" "See! She was happy. "I bought you a toothbrush of the same color. ”

It's not painful to go to work, it's painful to go to work every day. It's not painful to go to work every day, but the most painful thing is to work overtime. Overtime is not the most painful, the most painful is overtime every day. Working overtime every day is not the most painful, the most painful thing is to work overtime for free every day!

The head that was squeezed by the door.

One day I rummaged through the cabinet and couldn't find my phone, sat there in frustration, took out my phone, **Phone: I lost my phone.

Personally, I recommend not to do this, because first, the current information is not absolutely new, and it is guaranteed that you have not heard it, and the same is true for your girlfriend, and secondly, you will be more stressed in the future. It's better to be sincere, such as having time to go out on the weekend and do outdoor sports.