How to eliminate self blame in your heart How to overcome self blame?

What should I do if I feel guilty in my heart?

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How to eliminate the self-blame mentality in our hearts, around our lives, there is such a group of people, they are easy to blame themselves, as long as they make a small mistake, they will take medicine for self-examination. Even what happened many years ago is deeply etched in their minds. So, how did this overly self-blaming mentality come about, let's find out together.

When almost everyone is young, how to eliminate the self-blame mentality in their hearts, they will be blamed by their parents for doing something wrong. But sometimes, parents blame their children for not separating things from others, for example, by saying, "You broke the vase again, you're such a bad boy!"

In this way, the child will associate things with his own value and feel that he has done something wrong and is no longer valuable. Some parents don't say this, but the child will be very sensitive and can feel the harm caused to others by what they do, so they start to blame themselves. When such a child grows up, he will especially want to be flawless in everything he does.

How to eliminate the self-blame mentality in your heart and learn to find more reasons for your mistakes. Stop being accustomed to thinking that if something goes wrong, it must be your own problem. For example, the manager did not respond to Xiaolu's jokes, maybe because the manager didn't hear clearly, or misheard, or even the manager didn't have a sense of humor at all.

If Xiaolu could think like this, he would no longer be so easy to blame himself for all the problems. How to eliminate the self-blame mentality in your heart, allow yourself to make mistakes, and allow yourself to do a thing less than perfectly. Everyone has something they are not good at, give yourself a time to learn.

If you look at life as a process, compare yourself with others and not with others, make a little progress today compared to yesterday, and make a little progress tomorrow compared to today, then you will be successful. Even if you are not good enough for the time being, even if you are far behind others, it doesn't matter, because learning takes time.

Whenever people make a mistake, do something stupid, or bring about a terrible consequence that negatively affects others, they blame themselves.

If they can't stop blaming themselves, it may be because they have developed an emotional attachment to memories of the past. They can't let go.

Maybe you already know that you need to let go of your blame, but you can't do it easily. Part of you wants to take responsibility because that's how you don't get yourself out of trouble. If what you do causes some bad consequences, you are responsible for yourself.

Self-blame makes you accountable.

However, reminding yourself that blame is also a visceral anger can help. When we don't let go of anger and forgive ourselves, we erode our spirit. Our energy levels drop, and as mentioned earlier, it can lead to harmful behaviors. We end up destroying ourselves.

A waiver of self-blame does not mean that we absolve ourselves of responsibility. In fact, it is more important to learn lessons so that we do not repeat the mistakes of the past. It is in our highest interest to be able to move forward.

The reason behind the self-blame mentality is the sense of personal omnipotence, just like the sense of omnipotence in childhood, always thinking that they are omnipotent, children think that everything in the world is because of themselves, so, parents quarrel, etc., are also caused by their own not good enough, so self-blame, if, adulthood, and step-friends regret to continue to have this sense of omnipotence, that is, the growth is not strong enough, real maturity, is to recognize that they are not omnipotent, they are limited in ability, There are many things that you don't need to be responsible for, so if you want to change your cognition and grow up, you will gradually learn not to blame yourself! Learned? Kiss!

Your question has been received. Ways to overcome self-blame:1

If there is a situation, after a calm analysis, use the attribution method to decompose, that is, rationally and objectively analyze which problems are your own causes, which problems are the reasons of others, and which are uncontrollable unexpected reasons. 2.If it is your own part, then seriously reflect on the reasons for your mistakes, such as less experience, insufficient preparation or lack of knowledge, etc., take different correction methods for different situations, and tell yourself that "a wise man must make a mistake in a thousand thoughts", do not be too harsh on yourself, and know how to tolerate yourself is to know how to tolerate others and the world.

3.If you have an awareness of your core beliefs, you are capable and can do a lot of things, but your energy is limited, and it is impossible to do everything foolproof. So it's good to do your best, and it's worth encouraging to do your best.

Some people have higher requirements for themselves. Once you don't meet your expectations, it's easy to feel self-blame.

For example, I originally set a plan to go for a run, but due to various reasons, I couldn't complete it. Sometimes I just want to lie on the sofa and watch dramas, and do nothing.

And so, time passed. When I look back, I start to blame myself. I know that good health is important. I know that exercise is good for your health. Why can't you open your legs?

However, self-blame is not good for us. Because it will keep us in low air pressure and become less and less confident.

Even so, for many people, self-blame is not something that can be achieved without self-blame.

Better yet, reflect but not blame yourself. As soon as feelings of self-blame appear, immediately turn your thinking to solving the problem. Psychologists say that this can quickly get rid of self-blame.

So, when you blame yourself, you might as well ask yourself, what's the problem? What can be done?

Thinking is a question, and doing is the answer.