Parents and the elderly have different educational philosophies, how to reconcile them?

Don't have a head-on conflict with the elderly, and then communicate well with the elderly, and take the initiative to take responsibility for educating children. Parents are the guardians of their children, and it is the parents who play a decision-making role, and the old man just gives you some advice.

in homeschooling.

When children make mistakes, elders cannot always be separated. Parents can't just ask their elders to use our methods. Elders want to be with our educational philosophy.

Unanimous. Only in this way can the child's education be successful. Choose the right time to communicate, avoid pointing out problems in person, and don't directly criticize the elderly's practices.

If anyone finds fault, the direct reaction is negation and **, which is not good for solving the problem. Moreover, this kind of face-to-face accusation is not respectful enough for the elderly, and it also demonstrates a very bad behavior for the child, so he should wait for the matter to pass before talking to the elderly. This kind of communication will make the elderly understand that we are on the side, working together to help the children, and no one is paying for anyone.

Both parents and elders should be relaxed about their children's problems. As parents, we should not make decisions for our children, so that our children can grow up in a relaxed family atmosphere with principles and rules. In a family, the education of parents can be the focus.

When parents are at home and can take care of their children, the elders can take care of their children, do not interfere too much, do not interfere with the parents' education of their children. It is important to start from a common goal for the good of the child. When you want to give advice, start by putting yourself in a different position, not blaming, and use persuasive communication skills.

As young parents, we should be grateful to our elders. Parents should be worried about us and our children when they grow up. Therefore, while educating children, it is also necessary to let children know that it is difficult for their elders to take care of themselves. We should all be grateful and respectful of our elders.

Imagine taking care of children like a parenting expert, do everything scientifically, not to mention the elderly, we ourselves dare not guarantee that we are doing everything right. Therefore, it is better to grasp the big and let go of the small, do casually in some things that are harmless and do not have much impact on the child, and keep and do not make concessions on issues of principle.

When educating children, it should still be handed over to parents to educate children, and the elderly can play games with children when educating children.

Be sure to strengthen communication, don't be impulsive when you encounter anything, you must communicate first, and get the understanding of your parents.

I think the best way to do this is to absorb the opinions of both parties, so that we can educate our children together.

Parental education philosophy.

What to do if there is inconsistency

Sometimes parents may find that the little one seems to have recently learned to "read words and looks" and "see the wind and steer", why is this so? Most likely homeschooling.

Inconsistencies are caused by inconsistencies in family members' attitudes, attitudes, or methods towards the child's parenting. Next, I sorted out the relevant content of what to do if the parents' educational concepts are inconsistent, and I hope you like the article!

Serious consequences of inconsistent homeschooling

1. The baby has no sense of security.

Because the rules are constantly changing, what works for mom but not for dad often leaves the baby at a loss.

2. Babies are easy to learn to exploit loopholes. Like the example mentioned at the beginning of the article, the baby watches someone put down the dishes.

What he learned was not to obey the rules and obey the reason, but to deal with the different'People have to make different tricks.

3. The baby's psychology is affected. When family members are not in line with the concept of education, it is easy to quarrel, affecting family harmony, and for a long time in this environment, the baby can not feel the nourishment of love, which is the worst for him.

How to deal with inconsistencies in educational philosophies

1. Find a balance.

The two of them each took a step back to the middle, discussed it privately together, and then faced the child with the same principle, even if they did not agree with each other's practices, they could not show it in front of the child, first express their agreement with each other, and then communicate calmly when the child is not there, and the child will find that the parents are ironclad, there is no loophole to drill, and it will be easier to agree with the rules you set.

2. Take "children's reactions" as a weather vane for whether to take further action.

If the child does not have an abnormal situation due to certain behaviors of adults, it means that the child can adapt to different parenting styles and can find a state that makes him feel comfortable on his own, and we do not need to take further action. Sometimes, it's not that children don't fit in, it's that adults have opinions about each other and want to change each other, and children are just a mirror for us to see our own problems.

3. Don't lose control of your emotions in front of your children.

No matter how big the disagreement is, don't show it in front of your child.

4. Don't assume that your own ideas are necessarily right.

There is no unified answer to education, whether there is training and sleep, children will sleep well when they grow up; There is no chase to feed, there is no adult who does not like good food; Various parenting theories will help you make the process of raising children easier and happier, but if you sacrifice family harmony in order to adhere to a certain theory, you will undoubtedly pick up sesame seeds and throw away watermelon. If we notice some bad behaviour in our child, we can intervene, but only if we don't blame other family members.

Who should children listen to? How to communicate effectively when there is a disagreement with the education concept of the elderly?

When there is a deviation between the old man and his own concept in educating children, don't blame the old man in person, let alone blame the old man in front of the child, you should choose to communicate with the old man, and analyze it to the old man if he doesn't agree with your statement in person, he will also think about whether your statement is correct in his heart, and he will not blindly reject it.

If you want to solve the conflict of parenting, you must remember not to hurt the heart of the elderly, and do not hurt anyone in the family who helps to take care of the child, which is the premise of resolving the conflict. And then there's the tactful communication. Where you can't get used to it, you can do it yourself, and you don't care about the things of the raider's Zen, just let it go to the old man.

There are many ways and methods to educate children, not one-size-fits-all, not single and sloppy, the most important point is to teach by word and deed, lead by example, parents in the family are the role models of their children, teachers in the school are children's dust masters, strict teachers produce high apprentices, strict fathers produce filial piety, the power of example is infinite, the methods of education are diverse, and the road to success is difficult.

Sit down with your family, have a small family meeting, confirm the theme, talk about your child's education ideas, express your opinions, and suggest that you must be harmonious, and if there are elderly people, avoid hurting the self-esteem of the elderly. Let's plan calmly and confirm the "job responsibilities" of each family member. Reach a consensus and ask for the family's understanding and cooperation.

If you need to educate your children, try to avoid the presence of family members who have different educational concepts than you, and you must pay attention to your emotions and take care of each other's emotions between family members. Don't blame in person, you can choose the right time after the fact and communicate in the form of suggestions.

For example, use some interesting examples around you to inspire the other party, and it is important to control emotions when communicating to avoid causing conflict.

After reaching a consensus on the concept of education, it is necessary to take active actions to let the other party see the results and strive to win the recognition of the other party. At the very least, let the other person see that you are thinking about this issue carefully.

Educate children should listen to their mother's nonsense, because many mothers will tease the girl before the girl education is very good, and there are good education methods, and the concept of the elderly must be told to the old man about the importance of education, to tell the old man that this kind of education is very good for children.

When the educational concepts are inconsistent, you should imitate the world to tell the old man about his own thoughts, and he also needs to tell the old man about the interesting things of life, so that the old man is willing to listen to himself.

Parents and teachers should be listened to. I think parents should communicate with the elderly, tell the elderly not to spoil their children, and educate their children to be scientific.

Listen to the party that makes sense. Be sure to let the other person know what you really think, but also pay attention to your attitude, and don't get too excited.

Even if life is a piece of chicken feathers, you have to be patient to find a few pieces of chicken from the chicken feathers.

Jane and her husband have always had differences in the concept of education, and after communicating with each other, it is still difficult to reach an agreement after all. Jane thought that maybe she should compromise, after all, it was her child who was caught in the middle. But after thinking about it again, I felt that it was wrong, it was precisely because he was her child that she could not compromise.

How much of an impact will her momentary compromise have on the child?

Jane often felt helpless and powerless. One night, the child was writing an essay in the room with the door closed, and the husband suddenly rushed in, saying that he was sorting out the garbage and cleaning up the garbage. The son's writing train was interrupted and he sighed lightly.

At this time, Jane happened to pass by the door, and stood at the door and said, "It's okay to sort out the garbage now, interrupt other people's writing ideas!"

My husband walked out of the room without saying a word, and complained to Jane, Jane didn't want to quarrel with him, so she took the initiative to disarm and surrender, half joking and half saying, I was wrong, wrong! After that, he took a shower. Jane thought that this was the end of the matter.

After a while, I heard the sound of the door opening, followed by a roar: I'm your father, what's wrong with me entering your room? Am I wrong?

Jane had no way of hearing the child. Then there was another sentence, what do you sigh when I enter your room? I'm bothering you with your homework.

What about others still doing their homework and reading on the road? ......

Jane wanted to rush out and reason about it at the time, but in the end she held back, what if she quarreled this time? At most, let the child see one more quarrel.

Jane and her husband started a cold war, and they couldn't tell why, they just had nothing to say, they didn't want to say it, and they were tired. At this moment, she thought of divorce, she really didn't want to live together, she was too tired. I just want to grow up quietly with my children by myself.

Jane couldn't understand why adults should vent their emotions on children. The child is already a little timid and unconfident, and he is still very weak, and he does not dare to express his thoughts. Many times, indiscriminately splitting the head and covering the face is a scolding, and the child is stunned.

Wouldn't children make mistakes? Do you make mistakes by scolding to solve the problem?

Jane hoped that his children would be confident and generous, and had been doing their best to remedy it, but in the end, it was still unsuccessful. No matter how long the encouragement and praise are, it can't be compared to a roar.

Jane's educational philosophy is to respect children, understand children, analyze problems with children, face them together, and understand the truth together. Jane's husband is patriarchal, and his father's majesty is sacrosanct, as long as he makes a mistake, he is simple and rude, beaten or scolded.

Jane was already beginning to doubt herself, she felt that she was not a good mother to make her child what she is. She is helpless and powerless. At this moment, Jane was in a depressed mood and kept blaming herself and blaming herself.

Looking at Jane like this, I don't know what to say?

If there is some disagreement between parents and the elderly about the concept of educating their children, parents cannot confront the elderly head-on. First of all, the elderly are their own elders, and as juniors, they should respect their elders, even if they have ideas about their elders, they must communicate well; Secondly, it is human nature for the elderly to love their grandchildren, and there is nothing wrong with the elderly, as parents of children, they should understand the love that the elderly pour into their children, but the elderly do not grasp the scale of love, and turn love into doting, which will hurt children. Therefore, parents cannot stop the elderly from caring for their children, let alone reprimand them for their behavior.

Especially in front of children, parents can not quarrel with the elderly, so that children can see that there are conflicts between adults, and they can take advantage of the loopholes, and the education of children will be more difficult.

If there is a difference of opinion between parents and the elderly on educating their children, they should not confront the elderly face to face, but should find another opportunity to communicate patiently with the elderly and try to persuade the elderly. First of all, parents should affirm and thank the elderly for their children's dedication, because the elderly who dot on their children usually pour a lot of manpower and material resources into their children, and parents can warm the hearts of the elderly by expressing their gratitude for this, so that the two sides can better communicate; Secondly, parents should say what harm the current practices of the elderly will bring to the growth of their children, because all the elderly hope that their children can have a better future, and if parents say the impact of doting on their children's future parents, the elderly will take the initiative to change their practices; Thirdly, parents should give some reasonable suggestions to the elderly, which can not only allow the elderly to express their love for their children, but also avoid spoiling their children, which can make the elderly feel more comfortable. Of course, parents can't expect a communication to completely change the elderly, every time they encounter something specific in life, parents can communicate with the elderly, and slowly the elderly will make changes.

Touch the hearts of the elderly with true feelingsUse the truth to make the old people understand the correct concept of education! Thanks to the elderly for their dedication to the children, admit that they are all for us and for the good of the children, let them feel sincerely grateful and thankful, in order for the children to be more perfect and keep up with the progress of society, our educational concepts must also change. Nowadays, children will learn one or more specialties from an early age, and some old people feel that this is not a bad job, and they also delay their children's learning in vain, which is particularly unnecessary!

Children with special skills will be more confident, especially the children's skills laid since childhood, the hardships they endured when they were young, and the hardships they endured when they were young are all valuable assets when they grow up! It can be said to the old man that children in the past could endure hardships, but now children, several adults look at one, clothes come to reach out for food to open their mouths, what hardship can they eat? If you don't learn a specialty, find some "hard" to eat, and when you grow up, you can bear hardships and stand hard work, we can't help him for a lifetime!

The old man will be able to accept this concept!