Ask for a joke, thanks! 40

Confucius and Rulai played rock-paper-scissors, Confucius won the first game, played Rulai, and then Confucius won many games, and played Rulai full of bags, Rulai has been waiting for the opportunity to take revenge, and finally a game Rulai won, when he posed and was about to play, Confucius ran, and after that, Rulai has been maintaining the posture of playing people.

Xiao Lin was waiting for the bus at the station, there was a girl who kept staring at him and smiling, Xiao Lin knew that he was very handsome, so he attracted the girl so he paced in place a few times, and the girl on the other side smiled more and more brightly, and the aunt on the side said; Kobayashi: "Little youth, don't step on the shit, okay."

A (female) and B (male) were fighting together, A suddenly bit the back of B's hand, and B smiled and said, "I have never washed my hands since I was born." Then a smug smile said:

I've never brushed my teeth since I was born. After half a minute of silence, A grimaced and said stupidly, "Hehe."

I'm older than you. ”

When we were in college, our professors asked us, "What do you choose between money and wisdom?" "A buddy without thinking:

Money, of course! The professor smiled slightly: "I will choose wisdom."

You know why? Again, the buddy said without thinking, "Of course, people choose what they lack 、、、."

A police dog saw an ordinary dog coming on the road, so he ran to it fiercely and asked: I am a police dog, what are you?

The ordinary dog looked at it disdainfully and said: Fool, look clearly, Lao Tzu is plainclothes!

A man has a showdown with his girlfriend, Woman: Give me a reason to break up. M: We're not suitable. F: What's not right? Male: Gender inappropriate.

A hen was pregnant, and she said to her husband, "I have a stomachache, did the child kick me?" "Her husband gave her a blank look and said"You don't have a stomachache, you know if it hurts!! "

A girl fell out of love, and her friend comforted her and said: "Your ex-boyfriend studied civil engineering, and he looked like 'dirt' and 'wood'. A boy in software engineering next to him was half cold after hearing this.

A father bathes his 4-year-old daughter, and the daughter doesn't want to wash, and when the father puts his daughter in the bathtub, the daughter yells, "Mom, it's not good!" Daddy picks up the girl".

The child kept crying, and the father asked him why, and the child said, "I'm hungry...

Dad said, "Son, whatever you want to eat, just say, even if it's dragon liver and phoenix marrow, Dad will get it for you." ”

The child said, "All I have to eat ...

Dad scolded: "This Diao child, there is nothing you want to eat." ”

The two armies faced each other in the valley, and the guards came in to report the enemy: report to the commander, the enemy reconnaissance plane was taking pictures of us. Sir: Pass my orders - no laughs!

My classmate went to my parents' house on the weekend, I was at school, and I wanted to ask him to help me get some clothes and money, so I texted: "Help me burn some clothes and money." ”

You can join the army at the age of 18, and you can get married at the age of 22, explains. Women are more dangerous than the battlefield = =

I'll tell you a story that's a little suspenseful, a little funny, a little scary, that's. Sadako is pregnant.