Why is it that the more you are afraid of losing, the easier it is to lose?

When you are with your significant other, the more you are afraid that you will make a mistake and lose the other person, the easier it is for you to make mistakes. Being overly nervous and caring can change your mindset and affect how you behave in front of your significant other. So don't worry, it won't be like this!

This is a manifestation of lack of self-confidence, the more you are afraid of something, the easier it is to lose something, indicating that you are not confident in yourself and lack a sense of security, you need to adjust your state to make yourself strong and excellent, so that you will not be afraid of losing anything, because you have the confidence to believe that you can get better.

Then be confident and keep an objective and cheerful mindset.

I think in fact, the more afraid you are of losing in love, the tighter you may grasp it, but the tighter you grasp it, the easier it will be to lose. If you get along normally, I don't think there will be any problems, but sometimes it's really like this, because I care a lot, so I'm afraid of losing, but because I care too much, the more I want to protect myself this kind of thing or this person, the more I am more and more restrained, but too much restraint will make the situation worse. This may be why a girlfriend in some TV series loves this boyfriend because she really loves her, and then she will shout every day that you are not allowed to abandon me, you can't split your legs and so on.

Later, it became even more intensified.,Boyfriend's mobile phone is basically checked by her when she's with her.,The general chat object as long as it's a woman will keep asking if she likes her.,In the end, it evolved into constant suspicion.,Thinking that the boyfriend going out to do something without her must be looking for other girls.,In the end,The boyfriend really abandoned her.,Broke up with her.,And then found other girls.。

I think most boys may make the same choice as this boy, because love is indeed precious, this girl can really be said to love this boy very deeply, I'm afraid the boy himself knows, but once love becomes a big net, and then keeps binding this boy, and the tighter and tighter it is, I'm afraid that the boy will be out of breath later, this kind of love is too tiring to stick to it, so although I like and give up, but this breakup is also inevitable, So if you love someone, trust this person and give him a little freedom.

There are many reasons why the fear of losing is easier to lose, and in short, there are several reasons:

1.Fear is easy to paralyze the mind: people will have fear because of fear, which will affect people's behavior.

The more frightened a person is, the more unusual his behavior will become, so he often does something unbelievable, even stupid, and wrong, and is in a state of paralysis in his mind, often backfiring.

2.Fear is easy to indulge the other party: the more afraid people are, the easier it is to be caught by others, when they show timidity and fear in front of the other party, at a certain level, they are already in a disadvantageous position, and they are not far from losing.

How to overcome fear and fear?

First of all, we should recognize that fear is a kind of psychological fear, a psychological expectation of what people know and what they don't know. Therefore, to overcome fear, we must first start with psychology. For example: adjust the mentality, calm mind, etc.

Secondly, when a person feels scared, try to take a deep breath to relax and calm down so that you can cope calmly.

Why is it that the more afraid you are of losing someone, the easier it is to lose her?

In a relationship, they are independent of each other, but they can support each other. Loving each other and giving each other enough space, such a relationship should be needed by each other. The process of one party constantly paying is the process of constantly increasing the price for the other party, and in the eyes of the other party, you are less valuable and less worthy of being taken seriously.

The party who pays and sacrifices a lot will complain, be aggrieved, and be angry. And the other party will think very low of you, even unreasonable. Therefore, there must be certain principles and bottom lines for giving and sacrificing. When the other party tramples on your personality, don't blindly accommodate and endure.

Each person is an individual and should not be attached to anyone. If, by now, you are aware of your loss, you have progressed. Well, use your free time to improve yourself and do what you love.

Turn your attention to your body and mind and love yourself. In the near future, you will turn a new page. A good day is beckoning!

"Care" is easy to produce an unwilling psychology.

I have given so much for you, and you should give me back".

"Generally, people with high self-esteem have a very high degree of self-recognition when they encounter problems, but people with low self-esteem often lose their authenticity in their own evaluations, have too low awareness of self-worth, and are extremely sensitive to whatever they encounter."

So they are cautious, they are cautious, they are keen on a feedback from others, if the feedback of others is not good, they will first put all the blame on themselves, and then force themselves to change, so as to please the other party.

In fact, when you don't feel like yourself, you kill yourself, and at the same time, you make the other person lose the interest and attraction that you used to have, because you are no longer you."

However, your low self-esteem feelings make the other party unconsciously improve their status in the relationship, but you are prone to imbalance and unwillingness in your heart.

Then, the "work" begins.

Regarding this kind of mentality, it is most important to correct your own mentality.

Low self-esteem and personality cannot be exchanged for happy feelings.

Just like the sand in your hand, the tighter you hold it, the faster it will drain, don't have too much hope for anything, sometimes going with the flow is the best result, even if something is fought for, it will slowly leave you in the end.

Unexpected encounters are the best attitude, the heart does not expect too many things, but will get more things, sometimes the same is true of feelings, I hope to have a normal attitude towards love, because in the end it is always the best left for you.

This is a sign of a lack of self-confidence and security.

A very confident person, no matter what he has or what he has, can maintain self-confidence, he may be prepared for danger in times of peace, have a sense of crisis, but will not be afraid of losing. And people who lack self-confidence will also feel uneasy, afraid of losing, or even willing to give up after having it.

The so-called sense of security is a more technical statement, which refers to the fact that people's subconscious always feels insecure, and people themselves may not be completely aware of what causes this, but only feel worried, afraid, or need to be satisfied in various ways.

It's because you have it, no matter how good or bad it is, at least you have it, others may not have it, and you get more feelings than others.

But if you lose it, you just don't have it, and even if you lose all the previous feelings, you will feel very uncomfortable, so you are afraid of losing.

Insecurity The heart is not strong enough.

I am a person who suffers from gains and losses, and I am extremely insecure, and I used to be, and now I am relieved. But in fact, people who suffer from gains and losses and lack a sense of security are completely due to their personality, and it is difficult for a person's personality to change completely.

When I wasn't in love, but when I was in love, I was worried that no one would love me, and I was an old girl all my life. Later, when I got married, I began to worry about what would happen in the future, worried that the relationship was not strong, and missed the freedom of being single. I went to the hospital for a check-up, worried that I was afraid to see a doctor because of something, and I was worried that I would go to the hospital again and misdiagnose me as another disease.

In short, almost everything is worrying and fearful for me, and I rarely feel satisfied. I am always pessimistic, and I always look at problems from the perspective of pessimistic reality.

Frankly, it's hard to change this pessimistic and disappointed personality, but I've alleviated it. Because my husband is a positive and optimistic person, one of the mantras he often tells me is: nothing is wrong with JB.

Some time ago I was very unhappy at work, I left my job more than a month ago, and now I am still staying at home, I said to him: husband, I am unemployed, and I want you to support the family alone, and the burden is very heavy. He said to me, "It's okay!"

I said that meeting him gave me a sense of satisfaction and steadiness, even though I would still worry about the future, but because of him, I finally had a solid backing and armor to fight all my troubles. Because of the mentality of "nothing to do" that he passed on to me, I gradually alleviated my lack of security, and I became more positive and optimistic, and I became more smiling.

So how to alleviate the situation of loss and lack of security?

You can positively change your mindset and tell yourself: everything is not a big deal, just like my husband's wise saying, "It's okay." Have a positive mindset and always remind yourself that your worries are not a problem, and you can handle it!

In addition to self-adjustment, another way to alleviate your emotions of gaining and losing is to complain to your friends, let them explain you, and help you mediate. This is also to tell **, you can often talk to your friends, find some trustworthy friends with a good attitude to tell your troubles, see how they look at the problem, in the process of they persuade you to explain you, you will also feel a lot better.

You know the saying that "a crying child has milk to eat", so if one day you are suffering from gains and losses and lack of security, you should find your friends as trash cans, and I believe they will give you positive guidance.

In short, it is not terrible to suffer from gains and losses, and it is not a big deal to lack a sense of security, learn to change your pessimistic mood and mentality, learn to seek help from friends around you, and believe that one day, you will be positive and optimistic and laugh at life!

Don't let your abilities be less than what you have.

The reason for the gains and losses is simply here, without exception.

What you lack, you should find corresponding ways to improve yourself, improve your ability, and change must be taken seriously, not empty talk. When you move, it will always get better, at least not worse than it is now.

Suffering from gains and losses is actually wanting everything, not wanting to give up anything, focusing too much on the result and ignoring its process and significance.

As for how to overcome it, there are two lessons.

1.If something has already happened, no matter what, it can't change the outcome, then don't waste time thinking about it, and think about what if it was in the beginning, then hit yourself or pinch yourself, quickly divert your attention to do something else, no matter what method you use, you must force yourself not to think about it again.

2.When something needs to be decided, but the decision is difficult to make, and its pros and cons are not very clear, you might as well give yourself a time limit to think about. Once you have made your decision, refer to the first point.

Train yourself in this way, because life is originally one trouble after another, gains and losses are often quietly transformed into each other, and you can't think too much, and new changes may happen.