Why do people feel more withdrawn when they get older?

The phrase "getting more and more lonely" became particularly popular in the future, and it seems to be the case. In the process of growing up, our friends are lost all the way, and our true happiness is becoming less and less, and we live every day with the mask that we have carefully prepared for ourselves. There's no way to really peek into people's hearts.

Everyone has many facets, and they show different faces in front of different people. Especially as we become adults, the rules of adulthood are becoming more and more difficult to understand, we lock ourselves in our own world, people on the outside can't get in, and people on the inside can't get out.

It's like Chekov's article "The Man in the Suit", everyone lives carefully, and everything is considered after weighing the pros and cons. For a long time, I couldn't get these things, why are we maturing and there are fewer and fewer people left around. While the times are changing, so are people's hearts.

In this society, loneliness is just a norm, loneliness is inner loneliness, and being unsociable is superficial loneliness. In fact, each of us is in an isolated island, and we are not willing to open our hearts and let others in. New friends are too lazy to make friends, and old friends are not willing to keep them together.

There is naturally no one around, and when there is something, I am also used to facing it alone. Occasional collaborations are just to get the job done.

I used to be very fond of making friends, and I had a lot of friends around me. At that time, we always had endless topics to talk about, and every day with them made me feel happy. I rarely feel sad, I don't feel lonely, and every day is very happy.

It's as if the sky was blue and the water was clear in those years, and each of us was sincere to each other, and it was true that we would never be separated at that time. will leave the best to each other, will be good to each other without hesitation, and will spare no effort to bring happiness to each other. At that time, the children in the compound were like a family, and the classmates and friends at that time were like brothers and sisters.

Later, I don't remember when it started, and I said goodbye and really never saw each other again. Fa Xiao, who grew up together when he was a child, is a little better, and he still has something to say when he meets, but it's just a greeting, and he won't go deeper than half a minute like when he was a child. Classmates in junior high school and high school will basically say hello when they meet each other, even if they used to be close, in college, they don't want to waste their time making new friends, where everyone is an independent small group.

There is no way to tell who is sincere to whom and who is false to whom. When I grow up, what I want to pursue becomes less pure, so I will grow up and become more and more lonely.

Because the older a person grows, the more independent his mind will be, and the more independent his mind will be, the greater the difference between his thoughts and the thoughts of others, and the more isolated and helpless he will be. Most of us are sponsored by our parents to go to college, to be exposed to more knowledge, to keep getting better. While being educated, our minds are becoming more and more trendy and independent.

Our hearts are also getting harder and harder, and we are no longer as weak as before. But as we change, we will find that everyone becomes different, and everyone's own style becomes more and more prominent. The self in the crowd will be different.

And there are fewer and fewer similar people, when we want to find such a person, we will suddenly find that there will be no one who understands us, because no one has experienced exactly the same thing as you, including your own parents. <>

One day, I was very aggrieved, and when I picked up ** to my mother, I found that my mother could no longer give me advice, and the two of them will always be my harbor, but not my life. In this way, we are also becoming more and more selfish, we yearn for someone to share our pain with, we want our misfortunes to be understood, we want our treatment to be noticed, and we carry this heart until we become disappointed, until we begin to realize how special we are, and there is no analogue of it.

So, on this long road, we look forward to and lose, wandering and walking, the more lively the crowd, the more lonely we seem, the more lonely we are, and finally we will be familiar with this feeling, just like the feeling of satiety after a meal, and no longer make people care.

This is very normal, it shouldn't be a person who feels this way, many people will feel more and more lonely when they grow up, because the more they grow up, the more things they experience, then the perspective of looking at things will change, so they may slowly become more and more different from their previous self, so there will be a saying that "this person has changed so much", and I will feel more and more lonely as I grow up.

Many people should have heard such a song called "I Don't Want to Grow Up", and the lyrics of this song strongly express the idea that I don't want to grow up, because the more I grow up, the more lonely I feel. I'm not a big extrovert, but I like to join in the fun, and I like to go to various parties with my good friends, and my favorite is the Chinese New Year. When I was a child, I liked the Chinese New Year the most, because every New Year, I would play all night with my friends, and after eating Chinese New Year's Eve dinner, I would immediately run without a trace with my friends, I was afraid that there would not be enough time to play.

But now that I've grown up, I don't like to participate in this kind of gathering between friends anymore, and I'd rather sit alone in a corner and play with my mobile phone; During the Chinese New Year, I am no longer willing to go out with my friends to play all night, and would rather watch the Spring Festival Gala and then sleep. I don't think it's just me, I guess most people are like that. This is a manifestation of a person's loneliness as he grows up!

In fact, there is no need to worry too much, after all, this is also a manifestation of a person's growth, how can a person not grow up, although it is becoming more and more withdrawn, but it may also be more and more mature. Since we have grown up, we should change, but we must not be too withdrawn, people cannot live without friends, nor can we always live at home, we must also go out often to exercise, and gather with friends.

When people grow up and become withdrawn, in fact, not only the environment in which they grew up has changed, but also their own state of mind. Combined, you can feel withdrawn.

Let's start with the influence of the environment in which I grew up. When we were young, we always lived under the protection of our families, who loved us for fear of being hurt in the slightest. We are like living in a honey pot, with clothes to reach out and food to open our mouths.

But when we grow up, it's different, first, because we have to leave home to go to school and work, and our family can't "reach" us, and second, we are exposed to the black and white of society. I remember reading a sentence that says that there is no darkness in this world, but that someone keeps the darkness out of your sight.

I think sometimes family members are like this.

In addition, as I get older, my state of mind is also changing. When I was young, my mind was not fully mature, and I couldn't see many things clearly, but when I grew up, I saw through many things. I don't know if you're like this, anyway, after I took classes in college, I found that I was very emotional, and I liked to write down my "hypocritical" thoughts, and I felt that I was starting to become a person with a "story".

Sometimes I miss high school a lot and feel that college is tiring, more tiring than the third year of high school. There are also times when I feel that no one understands me, and many things about myself are unknown to others, that is, you have become withdrawn. That's how it grows.

In response to your question, here, I would like to make two suggestions: one is to communicate more with friends, chat, you will become much happier, and the other is to go out more, do not be bored at home or in the dormitory alone, go outside and walk around, and hang out with friends.

The more we grow up, the more lonely we become, we can no longer play as unscrupulously as before, we can no longer be like before, we can no longer accept a little hurt, and run to the arms of our parents to complain and cry, we can't stand a little criticism from others, so we quarrel with others. Gradually, we learned to be patient and strong. I learned to do my own thing, and try not to trouble others.

Like plum blossoms withstand the cold. <>

The older we get, the more lonely we get, and we start to think, we start to plan for the future, we have to find a job, in this day and age, jobs are so hard to find, and college students are everywhere every year. We have to work hard to find a job, in the company, we have to put away our little nature, learn to compromise, we have to get along with colleagues, and walk in the workplace every day.

The more we grow up, the more lonely we are, our growth means that our parents get older, we gradually look at our parents, begin to grow old, the parents who have worked hard for us all their lives begin to grow older, we also have changes in our hearts, we have to learn to adopt our parents, we want our parents not to worry about us, we want them to have a happy old age, the more they grow up, the more lonely they are, when they grow up. Our thinking has changed. We begin to think a lot, we start to have a certain degree of defense against the people around us, and we will disguise ourselves more and more, we are not willing to tell others what is on our minds, we are not willing to tell others our secrets.

That's the price that growth brings us, and if we want to grow, we have to pay the price, so there are many times when we don't want to grow up, we don't want to go into the world of adults, the world of unhappiness and pain.

When people are small, they will always get angry about a small thing. But the good is very fast, as soon as you give him a candy, he will immediately smile at you and think you are a good person. It's not that there used to be a saying that when you were a child, you laughed when you cried, and when you grew up, you cried when you laughed.

I remember when I was a kid when I was in elementary school. I had a little argument with a girl at the table next to me. At that time, I was still young, and maybe I didn't know how to hide my emotions or anything, so I told the story of my anger.

But I don't know what happened later, maybe after saying it, this matter passed, and we continued to reconcile and became good friends. <>

It's also very interesting to think about it now. When you grow up, you may hide your emotions or something, and even if you are angry, you won't say it. This may be the reason why people become more withdrawn as they grow older.

Our ideas are becoming more and more mature, and we are thinking more and more things, and they will not be as simple as when we were children, good is good, and bad is bad. And when you grow up, your ideas or dreams are different from others. People can't always be gregarious.

Everyone's life trajectory is different, and everyone's thoughts are different. That's why people grow up and become more and more withdrawn, and there are few like-minded people. Survival is a difficult thing.

When we were young, our parents helped us with everything. You don't have to think about anything, it's more about how to play and how to play with your friends. And the pressure we are facing now is also increasing, such as car loans, housing loans, the greater the pressure on people, the worse their mood, and don't be reluctant to communicate with the outside world.

I feel happy when I'm alone every day, and I have nothing to do to find a hobby, and there are so many fun things in this era, and you still feel withdrawn.

When people grow up, they have more ideas, that is, people often say that when they grow up, they are not simple. There are many ideas, the standard of judging the outside world has also been improved, the relationship between people has a sense of distance from the psychological aspect, and there are also some variables between the ideal and the reality, and these changes will inevitably bring anxiety, irritability, exclusivity, and self-centered reactions, feeling that the world is not so beautiful, people are not so selfless, and dreams are difficult to come true, these are very normal phenomena. However, there is a saying that "happiness" is a feeling, the proportion of psychology is higher than the proportion of matter, and the relationship between people is the same, abandoning utilitarianism, you will also find the truth, goodness, and beauty of human nature.

This is a stage that people must go through in the process of growing up, feeling lonely and lonely, which means that you should have a friend, go and fall in love.

The bigger the person; The more complex the thought, the more needs there are, and reality cannot be satisfied; The more things a man carries; And only bear it yourself; Others can't share it; It is still yourself who knows yourself best; their own minds; Soul; Idea; Therefore, people need confidants at this time; Friend; And often many times these conditions cannot be met.

Because when you were young, you didn't know anything, and the adults coaxed you. When you grow up and become sensible, adults will not be like when you were a child. So you feel lonely.

The vigilance is upgraded, there was no one when I was born, but I slowly had it when I grew up, and when I was working [you should understand], everyone was not frank enough.

It is possible to think too much and ask too much.

It may also be that you understand too much, or maybe you are disappointed too much.

Maybe it's because you're too smart.

Maybe it's because you're afraid to communicate.

It is impossible for a man to live alone.

So you also try to see the world in a different way.

Don't ask what society gives you, you just have to look at what you bring to the people around you.

Because of the people around you.

Slowly, they all got married, and there were fewer and fewer people who could play.

Loneliness is not a good model, it is only the feeling of modern people. Loneliness is perhaps an innate feeling in human beings. The baby's first cry after birth is because he feels lonely.

Loneliness has its own reasons and ways. People who are not good at talking feel lonely; Sociable people who are left and right can also feel lonely; Adults feel lonely, and so do small children. In fact, the real reason why I feel lonely is because people can't communicate well with each other, and they are wary and don't understand each other.

I can't talk about my innermost thoughts and feelings, and I have nowhere to express them.

The ancients have not been seen before.

I didn't see the comer afterward.

Thinking of heaven and earth.

Alone and weeping.

Chen Ziang's loneliness hurts to the bone marrow!

There are also different ways to get rid of loneliness, find friends to talk to, read, work or do things that interest you.

In short, enrich yourself.